A few years ago on another dating site, a pay site as well, I contacted a lady who said that she lived in France. (I live in the UK) We started to exchange emails and I learnt that she had been adopted by a church minister as a child because she had been given over for adoption by her natural mother at birth. After finishing school she had worked as a helper for the church,she gave me the name of the church funded organisation she worked for, and I checked it out on the internet, and most recently she had taken up training to teach English to children in school. After spending some time in college, the church had sent her to teach in a church funded school in Senegal, West Africa, as a trainee teacher receiving a small income. Which is where she lived now in the teachers accommodation at the school. French is the official language of Senegal inherited from the French Colonial era, and the church in France funds this school in Senegal, where she was sent to teach English. After this period of training she would, hopefully, proceed from there as a teacher within the church funded schools on a better income, which was her goal. Her command of written English was very good, but not perfect, we never spoke on the telephone. We exchanged emails on a daily basis for nearly a month, where I learnt the above, and we discussed what we had done during the day, and our likes and dislikes. We agreed that when her training was complete later in the year we would meet for a holiday somewhere, yet to be decided, and if all went well she would like me to meet her adoptive parents in France, where she would return to. In the meantime, we would continue to exchange emails daily, learning more about each other. Then sometime after, she asked me to send her some money, 100 USD, (65GBP) to enable her to give the children in her class a party at the end of school term, since her small income could not provide this.I had suffered scammers before, my world collapsed as I suddenly thought this is a scam, and I saw red, I replied and said what I thought. That she was not who she said she was, and that I was shocked, and would not send any money. Her reply was brief and to the point, that all I needed to have said was no, but I was clearly of hot temper and was not someone she wanted to be with. I never heard from her again, even though I did try to regain contact, had I just blown what could have been? I never checked her authenticity with the church organisation she said she worked for, pointless if she would not reply to my emails.

I would be interested to know your thoughts, was she real, or was it a scam, or is it impossible to know for sure?

Oh dear,oh dear.....
If she was real,she wouldnt have ran away when you explained the scam issue to her-i mean,you had built something together!
No,i dont think shes was what she said she was! And,am sure she would have volunteered to talk with you on phone-while in France and then later in Senegal!
But,had you tried to trace her IP address-to know where she really is?

Dear Sir, when yu get an email, the Moment yu See 'Church' 'Senegal' 'Refugee/Orphan', delete and Move On; SCAM!

And of course, if yu neva Talk on Phone, nor Chat on Webcam and when they Request Money; Goodbye!

I did not know then how to trace an IP address, and I no longer have the emails, it was years ago. In retropect, I should have got in contact by telephone, but we emailed for only a month in some ways it was early days. Thanks for your thoughts.

So you were looking to have a long distance relationship? Idk, but if you date someone closer to home, there is less of a risk of scamming going on.

I am looking to date closer to home these days, thanks for your thoughts.

I'm surprised she didn't ask for money earlier.

Everything about this reads scammer.

You wasted some time but no doubt saved yourself a bunch of cash.

for ¨ be honest I consider the woman to be a fraud
and a scam person, it seemed like she just wanted the most information about you, I have even been subjected to such a person
but the person fik clear message,
You ask about the money you say your bank
can not give out money they do not accept us your card
but you see, I'm not your bank account, so I said no thank you, and I do not want to hear more from you mr scame

Obviously, this was a scam....
But I would like to say this: if a person doesn't want to move to telephone or chat very soon it doesn't mean they are necessarily scammers. Some people just need some more time and a good reason (ie. a feeling of greater mutual knowledge, trust, interest ) to move to next stages of closer and more direct communication... I am such a person and I am totally honest in my intentions.....

It ia simply amazing what 25 or so dollars will do for you and your tax-free income if you purchase a certificate of Ministry and register your own church and religion, then apply to the Govt. for tax-exempt status and you too can start raking in the money for your particular cause. Many Bible schools and various church ministries advertise in various religious magazines(except Catholic) with Minister/Reverend/Pastor credentials for sale that are fully recognized by most Protestant denominational organizations. Some even send you a collar that you can wear...Every person their own religion with their very own church(at least in name).Truly, the Church of Humankind....

I suspect that it was a scam.

Thanks everyone for your thoughts, and advice for avoiding scams in future online dating. Yes, I agree I think it was a scam, but I still have a little bit of doubt.

I feel for people who get their hearts broken over these criminals.

Its probably safest to meet people close to home

http://youtu.be/T8Ya7DF7Rco

Thanks for the youtube address, interesting viewing, which shows that there are a lot of online scams.
As you say, it is safer to stay closer to home when online dating.

the $100.00 USD would be only the first request. Anything in Africa should be immediately suspect - especially if they claim they are from somewhere else and are only there temporarily.

The first clue I picked up on was her teaching English. She was French, she was (supposedly) teaching in a French-speaking country. Why would she be teaching English? Any other language background I might not have been quite so suspicious, but the French are awfully proud of their language.

Anyway, I agree that you were very wise to question her and her reaction was highly suspicious. Sorry you got burned but it could have been much worse.

Edited to correct multiple typo!

Ken,
AM am orphan,been one all my life,BUT,i dont spin it! Well,maybe i should start-better late than never!

NOT ANYTHING in Africa!! Some-most will be in Europe and are Europeans and Asians,with ties in Africa and US!! Dig deeper,you'll know what and where!

You shouldn't have any doubt...if they ask for money they are a scam. Harsh, I know.