Keep in touch with her, and help her cope with a very emotional and serious decision she has made to break your heart. You can't really undo it, but do you try to keep things friendly so her phsycotic or deviant behavior only paralizes her, and you take the high road and be a perfect gentleman? It's a hard task, but so much easier than being mean and emotionally vacant, or distraught.

She ripped your heart out. Did you deserve it? Either way, you have promised her until death do you part to keep supporting her in good times and bad, in sickness and in health. Are you a promise keeper? Try to be, at least until the Divorce and then still try afterward. Show her kindness and friendship...the kind she will be sorry she missed out on, but you'll always be happy you gave.

Yes, I've had my heart ripped out and my lungs slashed twice, once after 28 years. It's not any easier with less time pm the second marriage, 2.8 years. It hurts the same, but the hurt can only go away when you realease it's hold on you, and you be determined that love can't be this bad. Not always and not forever. Make up your mind what you can change about yourself, and move forward. I still keep in touch every day and try to lift her spirit...at least for now.

Be happy and be blessed.


LW2



LW2

VERY AWESOME MY FRIEND !
Well said ..
One of the few
BRAVO !

Very wise. I'd say you're a good man. It isn't easy watching the one you loved and lost reach back out into the world. Tougher still to support her when she experiences grief from that journey. Very admirable.

Every situation is unique & the only ones who make out in a bitter divorce are the lawyers! My wife & I still get along, we do things together, and help each other out. I'll say we have a relationship like Alan & his ex wife from 2 1/2 men with all the sarcasm, digs, & guilt trips. Otherwise it's good that we came to the mutual descision to dissolve our relationship as a couple in an adult & amicable way. "Happily Separated" I would call it!

Honestly when I got my divorce the first few years was tough. I only spoke to my ex when I had to due to we had two kids together...But I was invited by his mom every Thanksgiving to come over which I did in order to be there with my kids..And made sure that they were able to see her anytime she wanted too.. Actually to this day I'm still very close to my ex-mother in law.

Now it has been 21 years since then and we get along great.. We don't call each other all the time nor go places together.. But within the last few weeks due to some issues my grand daughter is staying with me and he picks her up from school each day takes her to his house till I get off work...

What happen in the past is in the past my kids have seen that we made a effort to get along therefore they don't understand when others can not... Which has turned out to be a good thing...

She broke it off with me, so she's on her own with her new husband...I don't want to give her ideas she can come back...

he can never come back, but if he is in need i will help him out of humanity.

Lols waiting for a divorce lyk u being so sure its goina happen dats crazy! Me gat no feelings for my ex's let the past stay put nat going bk or hanging around hoping we get bk together

I keep hoping my ex will walk off a cliff. I tried helping out, being a friend. As I found out, it was all lies, and B.S. My helping hand got slapped, or bitten, unless she could benefit from it.

My sole enjoyment is that she's now with an overbearing, controling jackass, who checks on her constantly. She can't make a move without his knowing about it. Tough nouggies!

My ex is the MVP of WTF

My ex-husband is actually one of my best friends. We do much better in a friendship configuration than we did as a couple.

I have an ex-boyfriend or two with whom I have the same kind of relationship. Sometimes two people will fail to work as a couple, but can be great friends, and I don't believe in discarding people just because they didn't fit into my life (or I into theirs) in one certain way.

There are myriad ways to love others, and only some of those ways are romantic. All of them, however, are meaningful and important.

I agree viamusica. things don;t have be totally negative.

there is a lot of bitterness in the comments in here. There are things about exes that are unpleasant for us, maybe some unpleasant memories or experiences - things they put us through. but mostly if we are honest with ourselves we realize that we had a hand in it too...

doesn't mean that we deserve some of the things that happen, and some of us were prolly victimized to some extent

but wishing ill toward someone who was once an integral part of your life is not healthy and it is also a sure sign to potential partners that you are not ready for a new, mature adult relatiosnhip

I can't say my ex husband and I will ever be friends, but I certainly wish no ill will. I have an ex boyfriend who I would prolly still be friends with if we lived closer as we parted on reasonable terms. I don;t know if he was mad, upset, or relieved when I called it off. I just don;'t think our relationship was in his best interests. but I seriously doubt he'd ever wish ill toward me - just wasn't evil minded like that. & neither am I

I kinda feel sorry for some of the people on here commenting but also see some of what 's been said as red flag territory too.

Don't look back. Don't let someone else's decision to be miserable seduce you into being manipulated and drained after absorbing the energy of her miserable life and problems.

Get even.

BE HAPPY!!!

Live your life like you want to actually enjoy it.

If you would rather be in misery and live with all that drama, its your choice. You are in charge of where you place your attention.

I recently got in touch with my ex girlfriend after five years to find out if she still wants to be friends and it's been alright. She even apologised for things that she did when we were in a relationship. It is a bit difficult though because we always seem to end up talking about the relationship and how we feel about each other and it's hard to move on from that, especially when it was an on and off relationship, with those sorts of conversations usually tending to rekindle the flames.

She made her decision five years ago though and she's still with him and seems to be happy, so I'm not entertaining ideas about trying to get back with her and yeah, I don't have to put up with all of her drama now that we are only friends and that was what was wrong with the relationship and why that didn't work.