of course

but in regards to being a 'good' guy

a woman will probably initially be attracted to the 'confident' bad guy than the insecure good one

and an insecure bad guy,, probably not gonna get the time of day,,lol

the confident good guy,, wont be able to beat them off with a stick,,,

,,just my observation

Again, ... what studies?

If a woman knows that the confident guy is also a bad guy, then why would she settle for a bad guy?

no partly because he is a bad guy
and partly because with a true "bad guy" confidence is arrogance

genuine bad guys are not confident

they actually lack self worth

and wimmen need to realize that YOU CAN'T FIX HIM !!! GIVE IT UP!!!

BTW I know what Ima talkin' 'bout

as van halen says

think ur tough?

I seen the toughest around...


(and they are not worth the trubble IMO)

this is why I said 'initially' once character is revealed it can either make or break that 'attraction'

you are sharing a open-secret of a female.


good guys does not have teeth and bad guys bits..so both are illusory situation in present era.

I don't think its just the confidence that attracts women to bad boys. I think the thrill of being with someone who is a little edgy or dangerous is what really gets them.

Confidence and indifference are quite different, so I'd have to disagree with you there.

I think msharmony is pretty safe generalizing on this topic. I don't know any woman who doesn't find confidence attractive.

I think that's more arrogance than confidence.

I feel that everyone has good points and MOST are likely based off of experiences they, or a friend/relative/etc., have had.

The truth of the matter is, even with all of the studies, everyone is as unique as their fingerprint, and what makes you vroom vroom will vary with age, time, menstrual calendar, lunar calendar, and an almost infinite number of other factors.

What I have seen in my short time on this planet is some decent looking guys who are confident as all get-out, that treated ladies well, but not great, and they were able to "run through" many of them.

I guess what I am trying to say is to be yourself, and that lady or guy will either dig you, or dig a hole for you. The difficulty comes from a lack of communication. Get THAT art down, and you'll have a happy life with minimal worries.

Just my two cents, now I'm broke, and good seeing all the familiar faces!

I agree with you about arrogance versus confidence...I don't think anyone is totally confident all the time or confident in all areas...Healthy self-esteem involves being honest about who we are. And honest (and in touch with reality) when it comes to our (present) skills and abilities...This is how I feel anyway...Arrogant people seem to be "masking" their insecurities by "puffing" themselves "up."

we are usually attracted to the values we subconsciously hold!
Not those we profess,but those real ones,we might not even realize we hold!
Our Sense Of Life!

I have found that we can also be attracted to people who have attributes we would like to have or that we need. That is why sometimes it appears that opposites attract. Opposites don't attract, like attracts like. But people are attracted to others that have a trait they are trying to develop in themselves.

Through the relationship, they then learn to grow and be more like the person they admire. Often when they have learned all they can, the relationship is over as it has served its purpose.

I agree. The attraction to bad boys is definitely in the mystery/excitement factor. A guy doesn't have to be a bad boy to be confident, though. I always say 2 things:

Confidence can make up for a thousand ills

and

What a woman wants is a man who isn't going to put up with her bullsh*t.

The last one is totally tongue-in-cheek so don't flame me! The point though is that being insecure or passive is totally a turn-off and this is what a lot of so-called "nice" guys don't get.

The first thing women notice is whether or not you are attractive, just like guys do. But, if you are not confident in yourself and continually ask her to make the decisions, then you turn her off and there is no going back. Hint...If a woman looks at you and smiles, and you think she is hot, talk to her. She will be waiting. If you don't.....no confidence and you go to the back of the line. No if her smile is a laugh... that's not a good thing. Unless you told a joke. Just don't be overconfident and act like an ***. It is a fine line, you just have to learn how to walk it.

I see very good looking bad boy types all the time here in the 'hood and I am not at all attracted to them. not even a little bit

I think we're all attracted to different things.

Personally, I'm uncomfortable with extremes, so tend to look for balance.

I find it hard to HAVE confidence in a man who has little to no confidence in himself. But my own experience with overly confident men has been that some aren't only confident in running his own life, but confident that he knows best how to run mine too. Step back!

The way he smiles at me usually tells me he's confident enough to approach me, but by not trying a "Hey baby, I know you wanna piece of THIS" move, I know that he's not so full of himself that he will be trying to control my decision by forcing all his greatness on me.

If someone is confident enough with themselves, then they won't feel any actual need to say that they're this or that. Anyway, when a guy usually says he is, I believe him way less than a guy who didn't say it. Bad guys will never turn me on, just like what Cynderella was saying. Arrogance will never win me over. And I can sniff it out like a police dog searching for drugs.