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Topic: Marriage is Outdated
no photo
Sun 09/08/13 08:29 PM
Nobody takes marriage seriously anymore. So I reckon we should revert back to our old pagan ways. For example, back then women were not ashamed to run about naked in fields. This is probably where the legend of the nymph came from. Because they were so at peace with their sexuality that if some unsuspecting man were to come passing through at that precise moment in time he would most likely get seduced by them. Imagine that, women seducing the men...

no photo
Sun 09/08/13 08:50 PM
So you think the answer to the decay of marriage is everybody running around naked? rofl

TawtStrat's photo
Mon 09/09/13 04:30 AM
Be careful what you wish for mate. I've had women seducing me and it can be a bit scarey when they go after you like that. I think that you mentioned the movie Fatal attraction in another one of your posts. Well, I've been there and got the t-shirt.

unsure's photo
Mon 09/09/13 04:40 AM
I don't think marriage is outdated. I just think people need to get their morals right. Once you are married you have to get a mindset that you are no longer free to get out and do what you want. If you can not stick with one person then, don't get married.
I don't think it will ever come to the point to where all the women will be running around naked. I don't think I could really ever pursue a man. I have yet to make the first move on someone so why would I start now?
Marriage can be good IF you are with the right person and you both agree to the same thing. Everyone acts like being married is a bad thing..its not if you are IN love with that person.
UGGG I am frustrated so I am out of here!

misswright's photo
Mon 09/09/13 05:43 AM
Traditional marriage died many moons ago. It's been replaced with companionship marriage now. The former involved the union between a man and woman for life, hence the traditional vow:

I,_____ take you, _____, to be my wife (or husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part. (obey for women was/is an option)

Today's vows should be more like: I love you 'til you piss me off and I don't anymore or something better comes along. whoa

Divorce is not only acceptable now, it's expected at the first sign of trouble because we have become an increasingly individualistic soceity (in the US at least). If either party is unhappy, they just go their separate ways and seek happiness elsewhere. Too many options available now, thanks in large part to technology, for people to try and work on issues and stay the course, honor the commitment made. It's easier to just move along, and we're all for easy these days. We've become not only individualistic but also enamored with instant gratification. We expect to get what we want when we want it.

Marriage then..."till death do US part". :angel:
Marriage today..."what have you done for ME lately?" slaphead

This is why I've never been married, nor will I ever be married. You are correct in that MOST people don't take marriage seriously anymore, at least not the traditional kind. Sad, really. sad2


sparkyae5's photo
Mon 09/09/13 07:02 AM
hang in there,i see marriage as a commitment between a man and a woman.....women have to stand up to the men. ...why invest of yourself if you can BS the woman to get what you want. ....its not just guys fault. two my sisters picked jerks family and there friends tried to talk sense into the them. they would just say but i love him.but i love him. it has taken a long time to figure it out,,,,,ATTRACTION IS NOT A CHOICE !!! its a image of caregiver from childhood, the one that helped form our favorite feelings.yes we do have favorite feelings........enough i have to go....commitment is not dead!!!!!!

willing2's photo
Mon 09/09/13 07:10 AM
I don't got nuthin agin' gittin married.

Hell I liked it so much, I dun it four times.

venator's photo
Mon 09/09/13 07:10 AM
lol what's wrong with that

venator's photo
Mon 09/09/13 07:14 AM
i agree, mariages like my grandparents lasted cos they were from a generation where if you're rockin chair broke you fixed it you didn't just throw it out and get another one! i been marrried twice and got my heart broke and lost everything i owned in the process both times. twice is enough for me not looking for mariage, just someone to love and be loved by

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Mon 09/09/13 07:42 AM
Edited by SparklingCrystal 💖💎 on Mon 09/09/13 07:45 AM
I do believe in marriage, but not the way it is construed. I think the "till death do us part" bit is out of date. And I'd never ever go for the "obey" part either.
I also prefer the old pagan way, not cos I wanna walk around stark naked by the way, lol. What a world that would be! At least we wouldn't have to ask anyone's size no more :laughing:

Personally think monogamy is one of the problems. Having to love only the one person for half a century or more, only be intimate with that one person, I get depressed even thinking about it. Is it fair, natural, logical to demand this of people?

We've all been reared to feel hurt, upset, rejected if a partner strays. If you think about that: we HAVE BEEN reared ... meaning drilled, brainwashed. Who the h*ck done that to us???

As this subject has come up several times here, I'm currently re-assessing my vision. It ain't easy, as I also have been reared to get hurt and upset if my partner strays. But logical brain asks: Why????
If he (or I for that matter) share a physical moment, does that mean I love my partner any less? Not necessarily ...

Maybe if this bit was somewhat more pagan, marriages wouldn't fall apart so easily either ...

Food for thought, this subject

TawtStrat's photo
Mon 09/09/13 08:23 AM
Whether you want to call it cheating or not people get hurt and you shouldn't do that to someone that you supposedly love. I had a girlfriend that met someone on a so-called "break" and it ruined our relationship. She was playing two men and wanted to have her cake and eat it. It wasn't because I had been brainwashed that I finished it. There was nothing wrong with our sex life but she wanted a lifestyle that she thought that I couldn't give her and that the other guy could. I told her to just get on with it with him then and that I didn't think that we should see each other anymore. I had even put up with it for a while though and I wasn't jealous or insecure because she was having sex with him. It was the fact that they were in an actual relationship and they were doing things like going to parties and on holiday together, while I was sitting on my own alone at home.

msharmony's photo
Mon 09/09/13 08:40 AM
Edited by msharmony on Mon 09/09/13 08:57 AM
the commitment that is marriage will never be outdated

but the priorities and values of a culture do change

so. culturally, marriage has become a joke that's about personal ego and government perks

but spiritually, a true commitment to each other and God , can be a beautiful treasure that will never be outdated,,,

misswright's photo
Mon 09/09/13 08:54 AM

I do believe in marriage, but not the way it is construed. I think the "till death do us part" bit is out of date. And I'd never ever go for the "obey" part either.
I also prefer the old pagan way, not cos I wanna walk around stark naked by the way, lol. What a world that would be! At least we wouldn't have to ask anyone's size no more :laughing:

Personally think monogamy is one of the problems. Having to love only the one person for half a century or more, only be intimate with that one person, I get depressed even thinking about it. Is it fair, natural, logical to demand this of people?

We've all been reared to feel hurt, upset, rejected if a partner strays. If you think about that: we HAVE BEEN reared ... meaning drilled, brainwashed. Who the h*ck done that to us???

As this subject has come up several times here, I'm currently re-assessing my vision. It ain't easy, as I also have been reared to get hurt and upset if my partner strays. But logical brain asks: Why????
If he (or I for that matter) share a physical moment, does that mean I love my partner any less? Not necessarily ...

Maybe if this bit was somewhat more pagan, marriages wouldn't fall apart so easily either ...

Food for thought, this subject


I think you're correct on the point of monogamy being an issue for many now. That's why we see such a dramatic increase in the swinger population. If that works for ya, so be it. Judge not, lest ye be judged. :thumbsup:

I couldn't share my man with other women sexually though, nor could I be intimate with another man if I was in love with my man. For me sex is about more than reaching orgasm or experiencing pleasure. It IS all that of course, (if things go right anyways :wink: laugh ) but shared exclusively with my man, an expression of love and a chance to unite in body as we have in heart. smitten

I used to get freaked out about the thought of having sex with the same person for the rest of my life. Hell, I might live to be 100 or some ridiculous age! scared But then I realized that as long as your willing to explore wants and desires with your forever partner, a boring sex life will never be an issue. If you really love each other, you can keep things interesting and learn to please each other by doing what feels best to your partner, and vice versa. Variety may be the spice of life but it doesn't necessarily mean you have to have multiple partners. You just have to be willing to be innovative in the bedroom with the one you love. think drool smokin

I'm old fashioned I guess. And an anomalie these days it seems. ohwell


KinBarrie's photo
Mon 09/09/13 09:30 AM

the commitment that is marriage will never be outdated

but the priorities and values of a culture do change

so. culturally, marriage has become a joke that's about personal ego and government perks

but spiritually, a true commitment to each other and God , can be a beautiful treasure that will never be outdated,,,


Absolutely 100% agree with you here, MsHarmony!happy

massiel's photo
Mon 09/09/13 09:35 AM

the commitment that is marriage will never be outdated

but the priorities and values of a culture do change

so. culturally, marriage has become a joke that's about personal ego and government perks

but spiritually, a true commitment to each other and God , can be a beautiful treasure that will never be outdated,,,


Well said!drinker

Dodo_David's photo
Mon 09/09/13 10:02 AM

Nobody takes marriage seriously anymore. So I reckon we should revert back to our old pagan ways. For example, back then women were not ashamed to run about naked in fields. This is probably where the legend of the nymph came from. Because they were so at peace with their sexuality that if some unsuspecting man were to come passing through at that precise moment in time he would most likely get seduced by them. Imagine that, women seducing the men...


"Those grapes are sour anyway," said the fox.

navygirl's photo
Mon 09/09/13 10:06 AM
I don't know if marriage is outdated; I think more its how people treat marriage. I have never been married but my friend's that are married treat it differently and seem to be happy. These couples give each other a lot more freedom and don't spend time 24/7 with each other which seems to make them appreciate each other that much more as they don't feel suffocated. I think these people have learned how to balance time together and time away from each other which has made their marriages quite successful and happy.

Goofball73's photo
Mon 09/09/13 11:56 AM
To heck with marriage. I say live single, have many partners (safely of course), keep all your money, pay your taxes and create a good retirement fun. You do all that and you do not run the risk of some chick (or dude) taking your crap. Live in the now. :thumbsup: tongue2 :laughing:

KinBarrie's photo
Mon 09/09/13 12:04 PM
Redmist6, are you into satanism or devil worship
by any chance? The bophamet goat with the satanic
hand sign. It indicates you are into the occult.

Times have changed, and for the worst. People now
are selfish, lustful or just don't have the patience
to stay married anymore. Divorce rates I'm sure are
the highest they've ever been.

If someone is just getting married until something
better comes along,they really have no business
getting married in the first place.


SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Mon 09/09/13 12:19 PM

Times have changed, and for the worst. People now
are selfish, lustful or just don't have the patience
to stay married anymore. Divorce rates I'm sure are
the highest they've ever been.

Sorry, but I think that's absolute BS! Have you ever read anything about the new times, the New Golden Age and so on? Then you'd understand it's not at all for the worst. It only seems that way if you're stuck in the old ways and/or fear the new and/or haven't really read anything about what's going on with mankind.
This is the dawning of the age of Aquarius and we're going through times of change, big changes at that!
We've had centuries of being told how to live, what to do, when to do it and so on. Now we get more and more responsibility ourselves and the freedom to choose. Meaning we have to learn how to deal with this new responsibility and freedom. It's a huge step, happened quite fast as well. Look back 2 generations and this freedom wasn't there at all. Well, not really anyways.
So quite understandably we are simply fumbling our way through, learning and trying to find a new balance. And this is for the better, not the worst!!

These things will take time, it's a major learning curve, not just of the individual, but of mankind.

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