I have not been on this site for nearly two years because I have been seeing an older man for 19 months.
Today was his birthday...he had already made plans without me and I could tell he did not want me to be there...I just feel like such a fool...I am crying and crying i just can't write everything that has happened on here

you are not a fool but your choice may not have been the best one but without more input i can only suggest you speak with a counselor and tease out your issues and resolve so that future choices will not repeat,, getting help with these issues will make your healing progress much faster and provide you with much needed empathy and support in this vulnerable time..

Just try to move on in your life, it was his loss....

This sounds like excellent advice.

Sorry this happen to you. Sure it doesn't feel good. This is why I don't recommend relationships across wide age frames. Someone usually gets hurt once the novelty wears off.

Be who you are, try to put it behind you! I am sure that there is a man out there that's willing to be committed to you. It's ok to cry sometimes, it doesn't mean that your weak it shows that you care and have a good heart...Love will find a way to your heart again Smile and out the pass behind you.

Well regardless of what the age difference, this could have happened even if you did everything exactly right by all standards. All relationships are a risk. In life, this kind of thing will happen to all of us male female all cultures and ages. Remember to stay strong and it is ok to cry just keep your dignity. Keep the drama out of your life especially in public. He does not deserve you but someone sweet strong and secure will come along and that is who deserves you, not him so do not waste your time going back and forth.

I agree you should seek counseling and keep it moving.

Sorry to hear that you got your heart broken. I think the worse part is when they don't tell you why it's over and I know only to well how that feels. As other posters have said have a good cry but also spend some time with friends and family to help you through this rough time. I know from experience that my friends and family will always be there for me no matter what happens which is why I treasure them.

The best therapy I found if you were head over heels is... SHOP:) I did this when it happened to me. Is also topped being a pushover and settling for anything less than what I need. Took a long trip. Then I got rid of anything she ever gave me. Bought new sheets, pillow cases, and comforters. Worked like a charm

Omg you trashed my red satin sheets and leather comforter?????




Just playing...sorry...

Look at it this way he's obviously someone that does not deserve you I suggest taking syberiticguys advice and get some counselling or be around friends, take the time to heal then find someone who does deserve you, hugs for you

I think he's an arse, for not at least telling you why. That's the least he could have done. As per usual, a coward gets it his way and backs off. Your family and friends will always be there for you ;) Don't trust ANY guy, until you know him well. If it's of any comfort to you, your family and friends will hate him for doing this to you. He has managed to now paint a bad image of himself, and they will think less of him.

Just a guess but it could be that he didn't want you at his birthday party because he didn't want his friends or family making comments about your age.

I was seeing a girl half my age recently and although she did want to meet my mother, she said that she didn't want her making "age jokes" because she tends to date older guys and has had that before.

I don't think that you need counceling but you could certainly ask the guy what his problem is. Sometimes younger women can be a bit subserviant and don't like to start arguments with older guys because they feel that they are wiser than they are.

My heart goes out to you, I know exactly how you feel, hugs

There's two years of history here and without knowing more (and you shouldn't have to feel you need to share more) it's hard to tell why this happened or what he is also feeling.

I'm sad for you at this moment and hope that there was maybe a misunderstanding that has happened and that he will be able to come to you and explain. This doesn't fix the hurt but maybe it will help to bring closure or maybe even heal.

One thing for sure is try not to carry the load of his choices. You may already know so much more than you have mentioned that allows you to think it through or maybe in time it will be made more clear but this is all a part of finding "the one" or "a one" that is even more suited to you.

Also though I do hope that you get a clear understanding for why, and maybe by chance it will even come from him unless his intentions really were hurtful or so selfish on his part which I hope that wasn't the case.

May both of your hearts find the truth.

so nothing was said in advance?
did you just show up?
seems like there are a lot of missing details here...
are you his only friend?
he has to spend his whole birthday with you?
doesn't sound like you listen to his plans very well... maybe he had plans with other friends and plans for you later... not enough details, but the way it's written sounds like you making judgement calls....

If someone doesn't want to spend important time with you, why would you want to be with them at all? You have to look deep within yourself and know that you are more valuable then that.
Good luck and I hope you can make the most of this!!!

I feel for you we all get hurt by love and the pain cuts deep.Take a deep breath, regroup, love yourself,invite a friend to stay with you or visit family. Stay busy, don't be alone and look in the mirror and ask why? Time heals all wounds soon another will be interested in you. God loves us all!

Yep, if a person doesn't want to be with you there's nothing you can do but accept it and move on.