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| Topic: Tell me a joke. 😅😂 | |
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The teacher gives the student a letter. teacher: definitely do not read this letter. and give to your father. /// The father reads the letter.
In the letter writes: Your child speaks a lot to the class. please tell your child something about it. /// and the father writes a letter. give the letter to the child. father: give this to the teacher. /// The child gives the teacher the letter the next day. writes in the letter: You have not seen her mother. he speaks more. |
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a guy decides to bring his new philipino girlfriend to a football game. after the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game. she replies: "oh it was great, i loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing i don't understand.""what did you not understand ?"and the philipino says: "well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. so i thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!" Hhhhmmm   you'd have to understand football and philipino culture to get the joke. |
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a guy decides to bring his new philipino girlfriend to a football game. after the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game. she replies: "oh it was great, i loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing i don't understand.""what did you not understand ?"and the philipino says: "well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. so i thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!" Hhhhmmm you'd have to understand football and philipino culture to get the joke. 
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My last girlfriend had conjunctivitis, she was a sight for sore eyes.
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Shopping Woes...Guys, beware..
A ‘heads up’ for those men who may be regular Home Depot customers. This one caught me by surprise. I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don’t be naive enough to think it couldn’t happen to you or your friends. Here’s how the scam works: Two seriously good-looking 20-21 year-old girls come over to your car as you are packing your shopping into the trunk. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, practically falling out of their skimpy tops. It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say ‘no’ and instead ask you for a ride to McDonalds. You agree and they get into the back seat. On the way, they start undressing. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and starts crawling all over you, while the other one steals your wallet. I had my wallet stolen August 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th, 17th, 20th, 24th & 29th. Also September 1st & 4th, twice on the 8th, 16th, 23rd, 26th, three times last Monday and very likely again this upcoming weekend. So tell your friends to be careful. P.S. Wal-Mart has wallets on sale for 2.99 each. I found cheaper ones for $1.99 at K-Mart and bought them out. Also, you never will get to eat at McDonalds. I’ve already lost 11 pounds just running back and forth to Home Depot. |
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how do you know a chinaman has robbed your house?
your homework is done, your computer has been upgraded and two hours later the ****er is still sitting in his car in the your driveway trying to figure out how to back out. |
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why did the philipino chick tiptoe past the medicine cabinent?
because she didn't want to wake the sleeping pills |
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I’ve been taking viagra for sunburn, it doesn’t cure it, but it keeps the bedsheets off my legs at night
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A person is blood pressure and diabetes. /// People A and B go to the doctor. doctor: I prohibit you from dessert, meat, fatty foods. A: Okay, doctor. .... one week later... /// People A and B go to the restaurant. A person was sweet, greasy and meaty with all the dishes. B: The doctor banned you these meals. why are you eating? A: It does not matter. doctor does not know. |
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Lol what's a hot dog with no legs
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hahahahha,,maybe because he had a loooooong day!!
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I gave up masturbating 3 years ago, I’ve never quite felt myself since.
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I went to a karaoke bar last night that didn’t play any 70’s music, first I was afraid
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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decide to go on a camping trip. After dinner and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend. "Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see." Watson replied, "I see millions of stars." "What does that tell you?" Watson pondered for a minute. "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. What does it tell you, Holmes? Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: "Watson, you idi*t. Someone has stolen our tent!" |
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What do you call a hen staring at a lettuce?
Chicken sees a salad |
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I bought the ex a fridge for her birthday, I wasn’t sure if she’d like it but when she opened it her face lit up.
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What's it take to circumsize a Blue Whale?
 4 Skin Divers.. 
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black dog
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JOKE.
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