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Topic: Trust
Suresh Gupta's photo
Thu 11/08/18 10:05 PM
I think the best way to preserve a relationship is honesty... If you are honest, there are chances of fights but tge bond would become stronger.

Easttowest72's photo
Thu 11/08/18 11:12 PM
I agree. The biggest liars I've ever met want blind trust.

Suresh Gupta's photo
Thu 11/08/18 11:49 PM
Yaa

no photo
Fri 11/09/18 12:08 AM
Great relationship relies on truest. People who lie to others makke a bad impression on other people, first impression is most important. If you cheat once, it' s possible for other folks never truest you anymore.

Tom4Uhere's photo
Fri 11/09/18 12:12 AM
Trust is vital in a loving relationship.
Once trust has been broken, its extremely difficult to overcome.

Honesty is important to a relationship but will not preserve a relationship once the trust is broken.

Dedication and Commitment are also important in a relationship but will not preserve it once trust is broken.

Its possible to trust someone even tho they do bad things as long as they are honest, show dedication and commitment.

The lie violates trust and betrays the relationship.
There are few things that break a relationship as much as betrayal of trust.

A LIE is something that is done on purpose.
An ERROR is something that is done by accident due to some type of ignorance.

IgorFrankensteen's photo
Fri 11/09/18 03:37 AM
One of the ways I think of this, is that trust is one of the three legs of a solid three-legged stool. The other two are faith, and dedication.

The most successful relationships must have all three. Trust, based on willingness and belief in honesty; faith, which is the overall belief in love and in the rightness of loving; and dedication, as in the true commitment to BE in the relationship with each other.

Collectively, this could be A definition of Real Love.

As with a stool, take any of those three away, and the stool will fall, no matter how solid the other two are.

no photo
Fri 11/09/18 03:57 AM

One of the ways I think of this, is that trust is one of the three legs of a solid three-legged stool. The other two are faith, and dedication.

The most successful relationships must have all three. Trust, based on willingness and belief in honesty; faith, which is the overall belief in love and in the rightness of loving; and dedication, as in the true commitment to BE in the relationship with each other.

Collectively, this could be A definition of Real Love.

As with a stool, take any of those three away, and the stool will fall, no matter how solid the other two are.


True, but finding a woman with 3 legs is hard

JustBeHonest's photo
Fri 11/09/18 07:07 AM


One of the ways I think of this, is that trust is one of the three legs of a solid three-legged stool. The other two are faith, and dedication.

The most successful relationships must have all three. Trust, based on willingness and belief in honesty; faith, which is the overall belief in love and in the rightness of loving; and dedication, as in the true commitment to BE in the relationship with each other.

Collectively, this could be A definition of Real Love.

As with a stool, take any of those three away, and the stool will fall, no matter how solid the other two are.


True, but finding a woman with 3 legs is hard


Lots of women have 3 legs, have you not visited other planets?

Toodygirl5's photo
Fri 11/09/18 07:46 AM
Edited by Toodygirl5 on Fri 11/09/18 07:47 AM
Trust is very important to those who want a committed relationship.

ONLINE dating you. Have to private message and then move to meet in person, .other thsn that, You don't know that person Personally.

My Opinion .



Up2youandme's photo
Fri 11/09/18 08:09 AM
Trust is over rated ... it's the tool we use to shoot down anyone that come close to our bowl of cereal ....
It's delusional to think we can quantify it with parameters we set .

JustBeHonest's photo
Fri 11/09/18 08:34 AM

Trust is over rated ... it's the tool we use to shoot down anyone that come close to our bowl of cereal ....
It's delusional to think we can quantify it with parameters we set .


It is not overrated! Without trust in a relationship, you have Nothing,

Once you earn trust, it’s a beautiful thing.

Up2youandme's photo
Fri 11/09/18 08:47 AM
That's a misguided concept but that's your opinion and I can understand that.

But to me you earn that thru a marathon not by sprint to filling in the forms you set.

JustBeHonest's photo
Fri 11/09/18 08:50 AM





I don’t sprint!

no photo
Fri 11/09/18 09:58 AM

Trust is over rated ...



This has to be one of the silliest statements I've ever read on this website. It's especially noteworthy coming from a person who seems, based on writing skills, to be reasonably intelligent.

I do believe trust is not a factor when you first start dating someone. However, once you enter into a grownup relationship, trust is a crucial factor in the ultimate success or failure of the relationship.

Rock's photo
Fri 11/09/18 10:08 AM

I think the best way to preserve a relationship is honesty... If you are honest, there are chances of fights but tge bond would become stronger.


If you're dishonest, those 'fights' will be much worse.

no photo
Sat 11/10/18 07:36 AM
I think the best way to preserve a relationship is honesty... If you are honest, there are chances of fights but tge bond would become stronger.

That's kind of vague.

What kind of "honesty" are you referring to?

The kind that is a willful conscious choice based on biased opinion of what is "honest?"

Some kind of hypothetical third person objective observation where "honest" is simply consistent communication or something that can be compared to objective reality?

I mean there is a huge difference between someone who is knowingly dishonest about their emotions but are completely transparent and consistently react in the same way when they're hiding what they're truly feeling, and someone who can convince themselves, rationalized, that they feel something they don't.

IOW is it better if someone is dishonest with you with their words but you can see through their behavior? Or if someone believes their words are absolutely honest but either their behavior is dishonest (so they'll never believe you if you point it out, or argue with you that you're wrong) or their behavior neither definitively supports or negate their words (you just can't tell)?

Or do you believe in some sort of magic fairy land where people can be absolutely honest in both word and deed and it's also absolutely true and easy for you to determine the difference, and both are catered to your communication, understanding, and sensibilities?

Please feel free to share your magic formula for discerning the difference between behavior that is chosen to support what they want to be true (especially if it's ritualized behavior so not consciously realized to be dishonest), and behavior that is an organic extension and expression of how they really feel/believe. And if the latter, please share your ability to value and accept all behavior that is a natural extension/expression that you may not like but is "honest."


"Honesty" in a relationship is primarily your responsibility to determine and enforce through direct communication, not theirs to live up to your subjective ideological beliefs, as most "dishonesty" (or lack of transparency) isn't really cogitated upon and chosen.


I think the best way to preserve a relationship is honesty

IMO the people that cry about/idealize honesty don't really want honesty, they just want to shortcut the learning to communicate process.
"I don't want to learn how to determine if/when you're being honest and then face potential conflict trying to figure out, I just want you to guarantee me that you will never make me have to work at it and just be honest all the time."

Other than that, IMO people like to put forth things like "honesty" and "trust" and "loyalty" as "best" or "most" important things in a relationship as a means of virtue signalling. It's about their own ego rather than any true desire for mutual honesty in a relationship.

calista29's photo
Sat 11/10/18 08:58 AM
HONESTY is a core component in any given relationships.

Up2youandme's photo
Sat 11/10/18 09:21 AM

HONESTY is a core component in any given relationships.



And 9 out of 10 men will vehemently disagree with that if they don't want to spend the night on the couch. ...

Honey does my butt look big on this pants is the dreaded question most men cannot answer truthfully lol

MsLeeHM's photo
Sat 11/10/18 09:29 AM
In this kind of interaction on the internet building trust starts with what you put in your profile and your photo. How can anyone learn to trust me if I give a photo that is misleading because it is old or in some way hides what I really look like? People who post a photo from years earlier, of someone else, such as posting a photo of a woman instead of the man you say you are are lying, well unless they are trying to show they are across-dresser or transitioning. Or wearing hats or sunglasses.

We build trust by what we say and matching it with what we do. Lies or half-truths made simply to make a good impression will eventually be found out. Then any trust a person has started to have in you is broken. Yes some people might overlook it but is still done.

Either a person likes what they see and read or they don’t. Finding the right person for you starts from that first impression and has to be earned from that point on. Be honest. Be consistent. And not only be honest with others but be honest with yourself as well

calista29's photo
Sat 11/10/18 09:44 AM


HONESTY is a core component in any given relationships.



And 9 out of 10 men will vehemently disagree with that if they don't want to spend the night on the couch. ...

Honey does my butt look big on this pants is the dreaded question most men cannot answer truthfully lol


From the way i viewed it.Your head is bigger than your butt,honey!tongue2

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