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| Topic: How should I get back into dating? | |
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I hate dating and the idea of dating. It just not a fun experience for me. However I have to get back out there. So how do I do it?
I’m not good at it. I never know when I’m seen as a friend or more. Women I’m not interested in give me attention but the women I’m into aren’t interested in me. The dating games/rules are difficult. Like people will ghost you when I’m more direct. Getting used for dates. I’m not able to deal with women and kids right now and so far it’s like every women I meet around my age has kids. Is this something I should just settle with? I don’t even know where to go to meet other women ALL of my friends are home busy bodies so going out with others won’t work. Two of my ex’s found out I am single and are trying to get back together. Because of my feelings towards dating I’ve actually been considering it. But excuse my German, That’s ****ing stupid! Has anyone ever had negative feelings towards dating? How do I make them positive? |
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I've never been a fan of dating unless I've already found someone with potential. THEN I enjoy it.
It does help if you change the way the deal with it. For instance start seeing it as meeting someone new and having a nice time over cappuccinos. Don't make a first date (meet & greet) too long. An hour to see if there's potential is enough. And a non-alcoholic beverage is enough too, no need for more for a meet & greet. A meet & greet shouldn't cost much, not financially and not in time & energy. Also... a man calling himself a pushover is not attractive. People that have self-confidence & carry themselves well are. If you have problems here then work on it. Women want a strong man by their side, not a pushover. And strong means having self-confidence, knowing your worth, yet being sensitive and caring. And when going on a meet & greet, remember you don't owe anything. It's 30 - 60 mins in and then out. It's only testing the waters, chatting a bit, and if there is potential a real date, if not, polite & friendly goodbyes. |
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Edited by
Unknow
on
Mon 06/07/21 04:04 AM
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I hate dating and the idea of dating. It just not a fun experience for me. However I have to get back out there. So how do I do it? I’m not good at it. I never know when I’m seen as a friend or more. Women I’m not interested in give me attention but the women I’m into aren’t interested in me. The dating games/rules are difficult. Like people will ghost you when I’m more direct. Getting used for dates. I’m not able to deal with women and kids right now and so far it’s like every women I meet around my age has kids. Is this something I should just settle with? I don’t even know where to go to meet other women ALL of my friends are home busy bodies so going out with others won’t work. Two of my ex’s found out I am single and are trying to get back together. Because of my feelings towards dating I’ve actually been considering it. But excuse my German, That’s ****ing stupid! Has anyone ever had negative feelings towards dating? How do I make them positive? Yes, I have negative feelings towards dating, in fact starting any type of relationship does my head in, I gather I am not 'there' yet and will sabotage any interest because it serves my interest. I dont trust, I dont need a man and I am happy, so why change that? About you.... Good luck, not a good idea to go back to what never worked in the past. Just know...you are not the only one out there. Perhaps you need to meet that special someone in real life where you can see their smile, gage their personality, look into their eyes, feel if there is chemistry and see if they 'get' you and you 'get' them ...  . |
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I've never been a fan of dating unless I've already found someone with potential. THEN I enjoy it. It does help if you change the way the deal with it. For instance start seeing it as meeting someone new and having a nice time over cappuccinos. Don't make a first date (meet & greet) too long. An hour to see if there's potential is enough. And a non-alcoholic beverage is enough too, no need for more for a meet & greet. A meet & greet shouldn't cost much, not financially and not in time & energy. Also... a man calling himself a pushover is not attractive. People that have self-confidence & carry themselves well are. If you have problems here then work on it. Women want a strong man by their side, not a pushover. And strong means having self-confidence, knowing your worth, yet being sensitive and caring. And when going on a meet & greet, remember you don't owe anything. It's 30 - 60 mins in and then out. It's only testing the waters, chatting a bit, and if there is potential a real date, if not, polite & friendly goodbyes. Same. If I know someone then it’s different. Dating a stranger is difficult but that where I am right now. And don’t worry about the pushover stuff. I’m not meeting anyone on here. That’s why my stuff isn’t updated. My pic is from like 2008. (Mostly spam bots here). Don’t worry I’m very confident I really couldn’t say that 10 plus years ago. I’m good on that aspect of dating. It’s the starting fresh, people not being direct, time wasting, dishonesty and disappointing personalities. |
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It can be a pain separating the wheat from the chaff.
Especially, when the same chaff keeps showing up. Getting back into dating, should be done at your pace. It's your game plan to make. |
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I hate dating and the idea of dating. It just not a fun experience for me. However I have to get back out there. So how do I do it? I’m not good at it. I never know when I’m seen as a friend or more. Women I’m not interested in give me attention but the women I’m into aren’t interested in me. The dating games/rules are difficult. Like people will ghost you when I’m more direct. Getting used for dates. I’m not able to deal with women and kids right now and so far it’s like every women I meet around my age has kids. Is this something I should just settle with? I don’t even know where to go to meet other women ALL of my friends are home busy bodies so going out with others won’t work. Two of my ex’s found out I am single and are trying to get back together. Because of my feelings towards dating I’ve actually been considering it. But excuse my German, That’s ****ing stupid! Has anyone ever had negative feelings towards dating? How do I make them positive? I believe in meeting someone you first met online as soon as possible, more of a meet and greet than a first date, but it maybe better for you to spend a little more time in messaging before meeting each other. That way you will discover more about them first, and if you both really do want to meet up, and if and when you do meet they will not feel quite the stranger. Good luck in your search. |
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I hate dating and the idea of dating. It just not a fun experience for me. However I have to get back out there. So how do I do it? I’m not good at it. I never know when I’m seen as a friend or more. Women I’m not interested in give me attention but the women I’m into aren’t interested in me. The dating games/rules are difficult. Like people will ghost you when I’m more direct. Getting used for dates. I’m not able to deal with women and kids right now and so far it’s like every women I meet around my age has kids. Is this something I should just settle with? I don’t even know where to go to meet other women ALL of my friends are home busy bodies so going out with others won’t work. Two of my ex’s found out I am single and are trying to get back together. Because of my feelings towards dating I’ve actually been considering it. But excuse my German, That’s ****ing stupid! Has anyone ever had negative feelings towards dating? How do I make them positive? I believe in meeting someone you first met online as soon as possible, more of a meet and greet than a first date, but it maybe better for you to spend a little more time in messaging before meeting each other. That way you will discover more about them first, and if you both really do want to meet up, and if and when you do meet they will not feel quite the stranger. Good luck in your search. Good advice. But I think I’m done with the online dating stuff in general. I’ll focus on trying to do things live for a while before I become a hermit in the Alaskan mountains. I’ll make passionate love to the trees and polar bears such is the way of our world. |
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It can be a pain separating the wheat from the chaff. Especially, when the same chaff keeps showing up. Getting back into dating, should be done at your pace. It's your game plan to make. It almost feels like groundhogs day. Sitting across a table listening to someone thinking man I’ve think I’ve met you already. I’ll get back to it when I can. I don’t want to be rude but I’m thinking about long term relationships. I know when certain things won’t work and I refuse to waste any woman’s time simply because there is a physical attraction. |
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if you wanna get back into dating it's easy, women are always right. go into it with that mindset you're fine. I can't because I don't believe that claptrap.
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