Topic: another Joke - part 2
 Ꮢ Ꭷ Ᏸ ɨ Ꮑ's photo
Sun 03/05/23 05:19 AM
The mother-in-law, comes home and finds her son-in-law Johnny furiously packing his
suitcase.

"What happened?"

"What happened? I'll tell you what happened! I sent an email to my wife saying
that I was coming home from my trip today.

"I got home and guess what I found? Your daughter yes,your Rachel, with a naked guy
in our marital bed! This is the end of our marriage, I will leave forever!"

"Calm down!" says the mother-in-law. "There is something odd about this story.
Rachel would never do such a thing! Wait a minute while I check what happened."

Moments later, the mother-in-law comes back with a big smile. "You see, I said there
must be a simple explanation ... Rachel didn't receive your Email.🤣

F:smile:U:smile:N:smile:N:smile:Y

surely Rachel is using mingle2..... 🤣

Vibes's photo
Sun 03/05/23 07:13 AM
Network problem :grin:

Apple of Your EYES's photo
Sun 03/05/23 11:04 AM
A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a doctor who was retiring.
The older doctor suggested that the young one accompany him on his rounds, so the community could become used to a new doctor.
At the first house a woman complains, "I've been a little sick to my stomach."
The older doctor says, "Well, you've probably been overdoing the fresh fruit. Cut back on the amount you've been eating and see if that does the trick?"
As they left, the younger man said, "You didn't even examine that woman? How'd you come to the diagnosis so quickly?"
"I didn't have to. You noticed I dropped my stethoscope on the floor in there? When I bent over to pick it up, I noticed a half dozen banana peels in the trash. That was what probably was making her sick."
The younger doctor said "Pretty clever. If you don't mind, I think I'll try that at the next house."
Arriving at the next house, they spent several minutes talking with a younger woman. She said that she just didn't have the energy she once did and said, "I'm feeling terribly run down lately."
"You've probably been doing too much for the Church," the younger doctor told her. "Perhaps you should cut back a bit and see if that helps."
As they left, the elder doctor said, "I know that woman well. Your diagnosis is almost certainly correct, she's very active in the church, but how did you arrive at it?"
"I did what you did at the last house. I dropped my stethoscope and, when I bent down to retrieve it, I noticed the vicar under the bed.🤣

 Ꮢ Ꭷ Ᏸ ɨ Ꮑ's photo
Sun 03/05/23 11:51 AM
:smile::smile::smile:

JulieABush's photo
Sun 03/05/23 12:19 PM
Funny Apple Lovelaugh .

Apple of Your EYES's photo
Mon 03/06/23 03:07 PM
🤣WOMEN TOO LIKE MONEY🤣🤣:writing_hand:

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings.:bell:

:woman:The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs,:runner:‍♀️ when she opens the door, she saw Dennis, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Dennis says:speaking_head:" I’ll give you 500,000 naira to drop that towel.”:yen::smirk:
After thinking for a moment:thinking:, the woman drops her towel and stands nakéd in front of Dennis.🧔:eyes::peach:

After a few seconds, Dennis hands her 500,000 naira and leaves.:walking:‍♂️
The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks :speaking_head:“Who was that?”
:woman::speaking_head: “It was Dennis the next door neighbor,” she replies.
The husband says, “Great!! Did he say anything about the 500,000 he owes me?”:rolling_eyes:

JulieABush's photo
Tue 03/07/23 03:12 AM
Funny. Apple Lovelaugh .

Apple of Your EYES's photo
Sun 03/12/23 01:51 PM
The day i will never forget in life:scream:was the day
my Dad was in

the sitting room, I was outside. He called me
to help him

bring his shoe :mans_shoe: from his room. I brought the
shoe and asked

him where I should keep it. Dad said I should
keep it on his

head. Brothers and sisters, as an obedient
child,:raised_hands: I kept the

shoe on his head. The only thing I remember
after placing

the shoe on his head was that the earth
became void and

without form. Everywhere was dark and it felt
like Genesis
chapter 1:1&2 all over again. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
ctto

Apple of Your EYES's photo
Mon 03/13/23 11:23 PM
Newlywed wife, Monica said to husband Nick, "I have great news for you. Pretty soon we're going to be three in this house instead of two..."
Nick glowing with happiness and kissing his wife, purred. "Oh, darling, I'm the happiest man in the world."
Monica smiled and added, "I'm glad you feel that way, luv, because tomorrow morning my mother moves in with us."

JulieABush's photo
Tue 03/14/23 03:24 AM
Funny Apple Love:laugh .

Apple of Your EYES's photo
Sat 03/25/23 11:46 PM
A lonely 72-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again. She put an ad in the local newspaper that read: "Husband wanted! Must be in the 70 to 75 age group, must be kind and gentle and never raise his hand to me, must not run around after other women and, most importantly, must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person." She then included her address details.
The following day, she heard the doorbell ring and, much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a smartly dressed grey-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. In a basket on the back of the chair was an enormous bunch of red roses. Unfortunately, however, he had neither arms nor legs.
"You're not really asking me to consider you, are you?" the widow asked: "Just look at you, you have no legs!"
The grey-haired gentleman smiled and said: "Therefore, I cannot run around after other women can I?"
"But you don't have any arms either!" she snorted.
The grey-haired gentleman smiled and said: "Therefore, I can never raise my hand to you can I?"
She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: "Well O.K. but are you still good in bed?"
The grey-haired gentleman leaned back in his wheelchair, beamed a big, big smile and said: "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"🤣

JulieABush's photo
Sun 03/26/23 03:12 AM
Funny Apple Lovelaugh .

Apple of Your EYES's photo
Sun 03/26/23 04:43 AM
Funny Apple Love:stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: .

enjoy Julie:wave::blush::innocent:

sonofrangi's photo
Sun 03/26/23 12:53 PM
Bloody animals are smarter than I thought 🤣🤣🤣

Apple of Your EYES's photo
Sun 03/26/23 04:55 PM
looking forward to that smarter age of the 70's:grin::wave::wave:keep on laughing Sonofrangi

JulieABush's photo
Mon 03/27/23 03:16 AM
Ahh there’s the unspoken answer, he had a well trained service dog ring the doorbell for him:thumbsup: .

Redcarpet's photo
Mon 03/27/23 06:25 AM

A lonely 72-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again. She put an ad in the local newspaper that read: "Husband wanted! Must be in the 70 to 75 age group, must be kind and gentle and never raise his hand to me, must not run around after other women and, most importantly, must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person." She then included her address details.
The following day, she heard the doorbell ring and, much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a smartly dressed grey-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. In a basket on the back of the chair was an enormous bunch of red roses. Unfortunately, however, he had neither arms nor legs.
"You're not really asking me to consider you, are you?" the widow asked: "Just look at you, you have no legs!"
The grey-haired gentleman smiled and said: "Therefore, I cannot run around after other women can I?"
"But you don't have any arms either!" she snorted.
The grey-haired gentleman smiled and said: "Therefore, I can never raise my hand to you can I?"
She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: "Well O.K. but are you still good in bed?"
The grey-haired gentleman leaned back in his wheelchair, beamed a big, big smile and said: "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"🤣



Death by laughterlaugh laugh laugh laugh

 Ꮢ Ꭷ Ᏸ ɨ Ꮑ's photo
Mon 03/27/23 07:22 AM
🤣WOMEN TOO LIKE MONEY🤣🤣✍

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings.:bell:

:woman:The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs,:runner:‍♀️ when she opens the door, she saw Dennis, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Dennis says🗣" I’ll give you 500,000 naira to drop that towel.”:yen::smirk:
After thinking for a moment:thinking:, the woman drops her towel and stands nakéd in front of Dennis.🧔:eyes::peach:

After a few seconds, Dennis hands her 500,000 naira and leaves.:walking:‍♂️
The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks 🗣“Who was that?”
:woman:🗣 “It was Dennis the next door neighbor,” she replies.
The husband says, “Great!! Did he say anything about the 500,000 he owes me?”:rolling_eyes:

:laughing::laughing::laughing:
Never leave the moments.. great deal

Douglas's photo
Mon 04/03/23 03:21 PM
She shook her head and sniffed as we parted. "You'll never find another like me."


My dear, that is th

Douglas's photo
Mon 04/03/23 03:25 PM
She shook her head and sniffed as we parted. "You'll never find another like me."


My dear, that is the point.