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Community > Posts By > willowdraga
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Topic:
Culture encouraging fatness?
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Luckily, there are men who like women in all states of being in all races. Women who do not buy into their social misrepresentation will be confident and happy in their body and therefore be beautiful in all states of being. If a person is happy and big, the happiness is all that is important.
I am not thin and wouldn't want to be. I do however work out and eat healthy for my health but I don't ever want to be skinny. I want a man who loves me how I am as should all women. |
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Liberal intolerance is kind of an oxymoron isn't it? Right. |
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Topic:
sex on first date
Edited by
willowdraga
on
Mon 01/28/13 09:48 AM
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no its not ok for you need to respect yourself and not let the man control your mind you need to take things slow and not let any man take advantage of you Women can think for themselves and enjoy sex. Just because they decide to have sex on the first date does not mean they're letting a man take advantage of them. So yes, it's ok. ... but what if it doesn't work out, you've just added another sex partner to your list then THE THINGS THAT MAKE YOU GO... hhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmm Well, that's the risk you'll need to take any time you have sex with a new person. It can happen whether you're in a relationship or not. It is funny how women willingly limit themselves based on the old ideals of men who wanted to control women (through the fear of their sexuality)because controlling them was the only way they knew how to deal with them. We take a risk each time we allow someone closed to us, for sex or otherwise. Risks have to be taken to experience other humans. No matter if sex is involved or not. |
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OK yes dating is hard and trying in todays world.I have noticed some really bad attitudes and wont say much more than that and you know what I mean..But come on 4 to 7 years on a dating site what thats about? My cut off date is 24 months if nothing has developed nothinh by then im gone.Damn im not a ken doll and yes over 50 and have a few wrimkles but stable have great job,fun and very positive attitude.I just think people exspect to much out of people when dating.I dont live in a fantansy land of dating my request is easy be nice and down to earth.Just wanted you guys to give me your views,,thanks I have been on this site since 07. I recently changed my screen name so it doesn't show it. But I was on here for friends and play. I actually date more from other sites I am on that seems to have more people close to me. That doesn't mean I won't keep up with those I know on here and the best way to do that is stay here. Dating is hard. Having the attraction and the lifestyle/qualities/intellegence all together is actually difficult to find. I wish you luck in your search. I hope it happens for you in under 24 months. |
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Topic:
Is sex all men think about?
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No, I think I've heard both men and women saying that about how men use love to get sex and women use sex to get love. It's the old putdown that all that men want is sex and women on these forums complain about it all the time. A previous relationship of mine failed for a number of reasons but one of them was that she felt that all I wanted to do was to have sex with her and I didn't really want to take her out on dates and do all of those other things that couples do that are supposed to be romantic and make a lady feel special. It wasn't really true that I didn't want to take her out but at the time I was a bit afraid of the world and I wasn't all that enthusiastic about going out. I felt that I had a girlfriend and I didn't need to go out to meet people. I enjoyed just spending time alone with her and my saying that if she wanted to go out and do stuff we could do anything that she liked just made her feel that I didn't really want to go out and I was just saying that because she was hassling me. I remember taking her out for a meal and feeling frustrated that she didn't want to have sex when we got home because she had eaten a big meal and felt too bloated and tired. I couldn't just be happy that we had had a nice evening because I was expecting sex at the end of it. I do still feel that the physical intimacy is important in a relationship but it is not all that I want from a relationship and I don't do one night stands or try to pick up women just for sex. I do want sex but I don't want meaningless sex and I see sex as one of many ways that people express their love for each other. If I have a girlfriend and she wants to cook me a meal that makes me feel that she cares about me. If she gives me friendship and support that makes me feel close to her and that she cares about me. If someone just wants me for sex but doesn't want to get involved and have a proper relationship that isn't enough for me. I have settled for casual relationships in the past because I get lonely and something is better than nothing but I do not just think about sex and my relationships with women have not worked out because those women felt that they could not give me what I do need. Women also carry on the misogynistic ideology they were taught was "how it is". So they are their own worst enemies in some cases. I too have dealt with partners who thought I only wanted them for sex. I have had them feel that I wronged them because I had sex with them once and didn't want to see them again. Not one night stands just inferior performance that I did not want again. I just have a high sex drive and they did not, in the cases of the relationships that he felt he was a sex object. It is an incompatibility that happens. I have grown to know that sex for the purpose of sex has its purpose just as the amazing lovemaking I have with someone I love has its purpose. Neither being wrong. |
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Topic:
Is sex all men think about?
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Some women only want sex from men. It depends on the view of the person. It can also depend on their emotional state of being at the time. Emotionally unavailable people tend to just want sex or see sex as the only purpose for the interactions with their attracted partners. If they only want sex from you, they are doing you a favor in letting you know that right up front. You then know you are dealing with a person who is unavailable to you emotionally. Take it or leave it at that point. This is true but when a woman tells you that she just wants to have fun and nothing serious she may want more than just sex from you. She might want you to take her out on dates and she may even act as if you are in a relationship. Someone tells you that they aren't really looking for anything serious right now and you think that if you romance them they might decide that they do want more than just a fling. I do think of sex as an intimate experience that you share with someone that brings you closer to each other. I have tried to get women to love me by making love to them. They say that women use sex to get love and men use love to get sex but as much as I like sex it isn't all that I think about or all that I want. I want to be in a relationship with someone that makes me happy and I have known happiness although my relationships haven't worked out. I don't get what you find so hard to understand about why people want to be in relationships Tex. If you are one of those people that feels happy with your life and being on your own then I almost envy you but you say that you do want the emotional stuff and if you get emotionally involved with someone it is a serious relationship. You may want your relationships to be on your terms but unless you are kidding yourself about your relationships with women being emotional you do want to get involved and you do get why people want to be in relationships. It doesn't just count as a relationship when you marry someone or give them your credit card. I presume, "they" who say that women "use" sex to get love were men. The same old by line. In the old days, which some are still stuck on, men and women, women had to withhold sex because of social constructs ie they were not employable like a man so a man was needed to make a life, they were not considered equal so they had less rights making it impossible to get what they needed in life without a man, men control everything so it was hard to catch a break without playing it how they wanted it, etc... This is breaking down now but not all the way gone. Women can have sex for pure pleasure. If they can shake the taught misogynistic ideology that men have a right to judge her sexuality as wrong, that is. |
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 Think about it! It is too late for that to be a worry. We have already passed the time when the citizenry can fight against the government in a bloody battle and win. just the facts as they are But I will not have my grans killed by you or your friend who lost their mind and killed them in school in under a minute with an automatic rifle regardless to the non acceptance of the fact that there is no equal to firepower between the government and citizenry anymore. |
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For years I have advocated that the Second Amendment be mandatory in that everyone regardless of Race, colour, creed or mental condition be required to have guns. I have also advocated that the general population have access to equal weapons of the armed forces, just in case they are told to act against their own people by order of the govt. Let's keep the 'playing field'(aka 'the killing fields') level.It's all a matter of trust and if people cannot trust their government, why trust their military...never mind the police. Sorry but I have no reason to trust you or any other joe blow not kill my children or grans with a automatic rile. So no, every joe blow cannot have them. There is no way at this point the citizenry can compete with the force of the government or the police for that matter when it comes to fire power, it is too late for equal ground. That has to be accepted. |
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Topic:
Is sex all men think about?
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Some women only want sex from men.
It depends on the view of the person. It can also depend on their emotional state of being at the time. Emotionally unavailable people tend to just want sex or see sex as the only purpose for the interactions with their attracted partners. If they only want sex from you, they are doing you a favor in letting you know that right up front. You then know you are dealing with a person who is unavailable to you emotionally. Take it or leave it at that point. |
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If we want to take this to an evolutionary level....don't know if you want to get that deep or not but...
A woman has to care for the result of sex evolutionarily speaking, making sex more of serious consideration than just if she feels the urge with that person. Now with birth control, this should be a moot point but I am observing that these evolutionary residuals are more at play than some would think. A man thinking you are easy is really a social ill, it has nothing to do with real feelings or love or character of the woman. If a man chooses to allow social dictates to rule him, he is probably not good material to begin with. |
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We find what we look for, correct? So if you are looking for head games you will find them. A woman knows if there is chemistry, the chemical reaction our bodies have with someone that is chemically exciting within a few seconds of being close to them, yes. Does a woman decide sex will happen then, no. For me, sex isn't decided at any point. I let nature take it's course. If I am attracted enough to spend some time with you.... then if I am attracted enough to kiss you....if that goes well then maybe more will happen. I still hold the right to say no whenever I feel the need and so does he. I always look for facts and the truth. We could have told you from the beginning that not all women are the same and therefor women will decide to have sex at different times. Not all will know immediately if they're going to have sex with someone. laugh So, why didn't anyone? Facts and truth from your perspective though....which is slightly biased in one direction, wouldn't you agree? |
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Edited by
willowdraga
on
Mon 01/21/13 09:50 AM
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We find what we look for, correct?
So if you are looking for head games you will find them. A woman knows if there is chemistry, the chemical reaction our bodies have with someone that is chemically exciting within a few seconds of being close to them, yes. Does a woman decide sex will happen then, no. For me, sex isn't decided at any point. I let nature take it's course. If I am attracted enough to spend some time with you.... then if I am attracted enough to kiss you....if that goes well then maybe more will happen. I still hold the right to say no whenever I feel the need and so does he. |
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I'd want to know that they are single. Beyond that, I would hope the questions would just come up in conversation, as I don't like being interviewed on a date. And I have no desire to sit and ask someone a list of questions. Right. I know (as best you can) if they are single first before I ever have a long conversation with them....they don't get a date if not. But I try to just kind of lead the conversation in certain areas otherwise it is a natural flow. |
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it's not counter productive if sex is the only thing he was there for in the first place. So it is just the conquest is what you are saying? Invest time and energy just for the notch in the belt? Isn't that still counterproductive though....you might get horny again and she/he might be game still??? |
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And too, if the sex isn't good, I always try to give it a second shot because first times are so awkward that it is usually not either persons best. Ya know? Believe me only time I have only gave it one chance is when it really sucked normally go for it a second time just to make sure it was not as bad as I thought it was...  But.....have found out when it is really bad it still is the second time as well... Agreed. It is usually bad too the second time but I have had one exception and so glad that I did give it the second chance. 
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Topic:
Friends with benefits
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Fwbs is actually kind of complicated because it involves the friendship first and foremost so you have the mutual respect and then the sex happens nsa when both are available or in the mood. It is hard not to fall in love with someone you already love as a friend. You know you have a friends with benes if no sex is happening and you still hang out together.
Of course lots of people mistake fwb as almost anonymous nsa sex which that is not fwbs at all is ansa sex..... |
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But men should realize that women are not as excited about sex as you are and you are not doing them a favor providing your sexual services no matter how good you think you are, therefore they might have something you want and you are not 'entitled' to it just because she is dating you or even living with you. Women can absolutely be as excited about sex as men are.
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I've read in this forum a number of times that women decide whether or not they want to have sex with a man within only a few seconds. If this is true, why would you want to put it off? Are you afraid he'll think poorly of you if you have sex too soon? That he won't respect you? Or is it some kind of power play/head game? Personally, I would like to see how compatible we are at that level too as soon as possible because I have invested time into bad lovers before and it was wasted time. But if he shows misogynistic ideology at all then I won't even go there with him. If he believes women can be sluts and hos, then I won 't give him the chance to place me in the catagory. But it is not a head game ever with me. I am acting on what is happening between us. |
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And too, if the sex isn't good, I always try to give it a second shot because first times are so awkward that it is usually not either persons best. Ya know?
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Thanks Txs
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