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Community > Posts By > inni_dreamz
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Topic:
80/20 rule
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I read something in a profile once, that stuck ---
"The grass is always greener, where you water it" I have always tried, while in a relationship, to appreciate the good and understand that there is never anything perfect. As long as the good out weighs the bad - it's all good - in my book. My ex-husband became a drug addict and would not seek help. My ex-boyfriend chose sports over a relationship. In both relationships - the percentages flipped 80% bad 20% good ...so to speak. It would truly be a blessing if I could find someone where it was even 70-30.  I think you make a very good point - and one everyone should keep in mind while actually in a relationship. Focus on the good!!! :) Work on the gaps. Remember to be happy. |
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Topic:
Multiple Facebook Accounts
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If the guy really has 10 Facebook accounts; I would call that a flaming red flag. I can't say why for sure, but it sure sounds sketchy.
I have two Facebook accounts - one for gaming, and one for friends & family. It's hard to imagine why anyone would have more than 2 ... but 10? I'm glad you decided to come back and hang out in the forums! :) Good luck. 
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Topic:
Married couples
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Why do married men not break up with their wife if their in such an unhealthy and miserable relationship even though kids n house is involved? selfishness,, wanting all of what they want, with as little sacrifice as possible I agree. If either man or woman is unhappy in their marriage, they should end it ...before moving on to someone else. I do not date married or even "separated" --- fell for that once, a very long time ago. There is nothing anyone can do if the person lies about their situation, except end it the minute you find out. |
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Tired....
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I think women at least win, hands down ...no pun intended...in the "receiving pleasure" department, with their "multiple orgasm" capabilities. I have always envied this about them....all without maintaining an erection, also. Now I'm depressed.  cheer up Max ... orgasms are depressing too   :wags finger: No no no They are good 
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Topic:
im a girl that wants a bf
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Welcome to all those new to Mingle2 ~ and Good luck! |
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Inni_dreamz, Hey you, you poor girl, I can honestly say you truly love your husband if you can accept his illness. It takes special person to be able to look past the illness and still maintain a marriage. gold star for you. Well, he's my ex .. so eventually, I couldn't. We got together very young, and to this day - I doubt he would admit to being a narcissist. He added drugs to the mix - and that was a d.e.a.l.b.r.e.a.k.e.r....for me! |
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CrystalFairy, Hello, well I read your answers and I was floored and excited to see where you coming from. May I ask this, could love prevail with the right treatments, medication therapy, and love & understanding? Could it work? With a narcissist? Very difficult. There is no treatment for that. He could do therapy to learn different behaviours and reactions, but then it will still be learnt and copied behaviour, not from the heart. And you will always feel that it's not genuine, not heartfelt. Apart from that, they won't do therapy, because typically a narcissist will be adamant there's nothing wrong with him, but there's something wrong with you. The way they convey that time and again is so convincing that if you're vulnerable you'll start to believe he's right. The reason he won't do therapy is simple: narcissism is caused by a trauma that hit him real bad. Therapy will make him both face that trauma and will make him aware that his entire personality is fake. (he does know that by the way). He built that fake personality to not feel and face that trauma, so he won't be willing to go there. So no therapy for him. Only a mild narcissist may do so, most won't. I've done therapy with him, together. Not aimed to 'cure' him, relationship therapy. The way he dealt with a therapist was astounding. They either charm them to death too, or they verbally and mentally fence them off in a way that deserves a Nobel prize. It's almost admirable. That was my ex-husband. |
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If you haven't known them long enough to know their mental, emotional and physical health issues, before asking them to marry you, then you are moving way to fast. If they are hiding their illness(es) from you, (which should become noticeable)then what else would they hide from you. I'd be gone. I'm inclined to agree with this ^^^ .... Any significant mental illness should be disclosed well before you get to the "marriage" stage of a relationship. Now, if the person was honest, up front - from near the beginning of the relationship and taking medication for a moderate to mild mental illness - I would not consider that an instant deal breaker. It would truly depend on how they managed it. It's impossible to give a blanket answer to a very individual situation. |
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Topic:
for singles
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...lovin', touchin',squeezin',laughin',talkin',huggin'....
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Technology doesn't really replace jobs, it simply changes them from unskilled work to skilled labor. kiosk replairmen, software developess to creat the kiosk, network engineers to cable them up, steel/metal fabrication for design. .....it takes many many people to implement such a change. ...it' actually created jobs that one could make a career out of...... Not necessarily true, when you take a production line that required 12 people to run - and replace it with one mechanic. You just lost 11 jobs. OT of wages and Mc D's .... Wages have NOT kept up with the cost of living - period. That is a fact. Asking for better wages does not seem to solve the problem, obviously. I can't imagine how anyone can support a family on minimum wage. |
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My youth
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Topic:
Happy Turkey Day!
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Happy Thanksgiving to all who celebrate
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I wouldn't call it friend zone yet - unless the person is sure they will never have "those" feelings for the other person.
After really like before love ... it's just like a lot
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Some strange mix between happy and thankful and lonely and sad.
Mostly happy and thankful tho... |
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I couldn't agree more!
I'm not sure he gets that just yet, but he does a bit. He was doing pretty well at his last job. :) Sometimes, we lose our motivation - I just need to be sure he gets his back!
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I don't really care for parades lol ...
I have lived in So Cal most of my life and never wanted to go to the Rose Parade. I did go to the RoseBowl once - good game, but tiny little seats lol I have always loved Peanuts ... all their holiday shows and even the comics. |
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Topic:
single to mingle
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Welcome to Mingle2 |
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My guess is not many would be forthcoming with this information. We sort of hope you already like us quite a bit before you find these things out, and as soufie said - everyone does it. I recently asked a guy if he still believed it when girls said they don't fart, burp or poop.
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Winter in Southern California is nice - I must say.
It's 61 right now - and perrrfect. :) |
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