I would love to date a taller woman. I saw one in Wichita, Kansas. She was 7 foot 2 but then her tall boyfriend caught up with her. I think it would be so cool to be carried across the threshold even if she had to drive a forklift.

I treasure both of my mistakes. They never call or write though. Must be hell on your mother when the abortion talks back. You must be like the proof of her mistake. I am sorry to hear what you are going through.

I take two days off and I am lost. I know how you feel.

I was thinking of using Pam pan coating. It is not suppose to stick.

(((Rapunzel)))

Duncan, young poets just kill me. November 11 will make twenty four years for me in clean time and sobriety. Since I have written a lot of poetry they think I am something. This 15 year old girl from the UK asked me to read some of her poetry. It is freaking beautiful. I like her latest quotes. "I keep walking back to the one thing I need to get away from." I never knew my type until I met you." I am beginning to wonder if some women were just born Alanons. I know if I have a real problem with women I go to the Alanons for advice because their preamble states that the insanity affects the whole family.

The more I try to teach the more I get taught. I am really cursed. I was trying to teach the aide who came back because she had been working as a counselor at the treatment center for a year and had gotten out of practice with being a nurse's aide. She told to treat her like she was new which was hard for me to understand since she was at the nursing home when I first got the job. Everything was going fine until I was telling her about this resident that I really have had trouble with. I was trying to spare her needless aggravation. I thought by being in the room with her until the resident got to know her would be helpful. Then the resident got combative like always. The aide told me it was okay that she liked combative residents and didn't need me. To me it was like the fox with the grapes. The fox couldn't reach the grapes so he said, "They must be sour. I didn't want them anyways." I can't but help but think of, "The Grapes Of Wrath" by John Steinbeck.

After being frenchkissed by my little spitz while being sound asleep or having her sharp claws dig into my back I have been contemplating if it could be any worse than have cold feet on my back. Even though neither of the two dogs that I now have can talk we do have a good relationship. But sometimes I do wonder if another human being might be better.

Do you think the bedpan could be used as a musical instrument? I was thinking of starting a rock group with just bedpans of different sizes but am still thinking of how to tune them.

Have you noticed that the plastic bedpans are a lot warmer than the old stainless steel type? I think the plastic ones don't hurt as bad when you get hit over the head with one. Still I think the stainless bedpan hurts less than eight ball skillets.

Actually she is pretty light but she is like a spider with thin arms and legs. The hard part is keeping balance. Will have to try the powder since they don't make big funnels for bedpns.

Oh, yeah - twister thats the game.

Yeah, I have been thinking about taking up needlework since I keep tearing my scrub top pockets on wheelchairs and doorknobs.

Yeah, I make sure she has the soaker pad under her. But I have really tried not to be so clumsy but it is a real challenge. It was like that game where you have to put your feet and arms on the spots with another aide. You know the one where you get tangled up with them. I am trying to keep my balance and the aide was trying to keep her balance. The resident has this expression of wtf but of course she can't talk.

I used to be so alone and married but then one day I got a computer. I watch my married friends and it reminds me what lonliness used to feel like. Sometimes I still get lonely but all I have to do is point and click or go out to meet people.

You're right, James. So to make up for my transgressions I went to Harp's and bought some Always Save mushroom spaghetti sauce; two small cans of mushrooms; two large slices of garlic bread; a pound of hamburger meat and with the spaghetti noodles it came out pretty good. I know it probably as good as homemade but it sufficed. Since I had to take the two dogs out so they would stop jumping for the big plate I was able to answer one of the great philosophical questions that has been plaguing mankind for a few years and that is, "Who let the dogs out?"

So far I have tried to get the bedpan out and another aide said she tried to get it out without spilling the contents, too. We were both tried to get it out without spilling it and just about spilled it on each other. I sure hopes someones has a good answer.

The nurse's aide book only covers so much and hardly mentions the topic. One can only hope that most of those you might have to care for is ambulatory or atleast an easy wet check. I am sure those who work in hospitals this isn't much of a problem since it must seem like old hat. But for me we got this new resident whose language is mostly guttural and we have to guess what she is saying. We were lucky that she could say peepee which lets us know she has to urinate. The problem is now she is on just on a big mattress with cushion restraints that keep her from rolling off the mattress with a thinner mattress on the floor just in case she manages to roll over the six inch cushion. She is known to have seizures which is why the baby monitor is in effect. From the aide book it says to have the resident roll onto their side or lift their bottom. The problem becomes when one has their knees on the thinner cushion which makes the aide in an unbalanced position trying to lift the resident because the resident can't roll and th bedpan is on a mattress that gives like the thinner mattress. One nurse thought that baby or talcum powder might be a good lubricant to keep the bedpan from sticking to the glutemas maximus. I was just wondering if there was another lubricant that might be better.

So does drinking increase your bust size? It would seem from the picture that the more you drink the larger your breast get.

Great thread, JPMU57. I hope that you don't settle for less that what you want because it would seem that wouldn't make you happy or her either. You have managed for a few years on your own. I think that is really something as it shows you have a survivor spirit. Kudos