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Topic: YES OR NO TO Friends with Benefits?
Rapunzel's photo
Thu 10/16/08 05:48 PM
now Mike...


don't you think you could lighten up a bit,

and choose some different terminology...

i mean ...enough is enough flowerforyou


there are good people who live together flowerforyou

and they are not whores...noway

we really do need to let God be the Judge drinker


flame1cutie's photo
Thu 10/16/08 05:51 PM

now Mike...


don't you think you could lighten up a bit,

and choose some different terminology...

i mean ...enough is enough flowerforyou


there are good people who live together flowerforyou

and they are not whores...noway

we really do need to let God be the Judge drinker


Thank You. I agree with you.:heart: flowerforyou

countrymike's photo
Thu 10/16/08 05:53 PM
I used the term commitment as it would be biblically which is marriage...Is there not a commandment that says "thou shall not commit adultery" What is your definition of adultery?
FWB by all accounts is such an act...

Rapunzel's photo
Thu 10/16/08 05:54 PM
whether people get married, :heart:


live together flowerforyou


or have this FWB arrangement drinker


it really is an individual choice flowerforyou


no matter what we think spiritually :angel:





it is a person's free will & right drinker



we all have the right to choose smokin

countrymike's photo
Thu 10/16/08 06:05 PM
I do not want to argue the point much more but there is an old saying that goes like this...in order for evil to exist ,all it takes is for good men to do nothing...
When folks get on here and condone adultery, that raises the hair on my neck as well it should...Did you or any of these people who have commented on this taught their kids that adultery is cool? And why does age make a difference?
Lead by example..
God gave us free even to break his commandments. Do not confuse free will with "it's okay" He never said adultery was a right form of living, or have I missed the page in my Bible?

Rapunzel's photo
Thu 10/16/08 06:06 PM
i'm not trying to water down the gospel...flowerforyou


but people either believe or they don't ...happy


you can't force anything on someone else..noway

or try to condemn them :angry:

into believing what you believe

and flee from their sins...pitchfork




cause if people don't think frown


they are sinning...noway


they don't think frown


they are doing anything wrong noway


what is there to confess or flee from ?





soooo, unless someone believes the way you do...


your efforts are in vain...flowerforyou drinker flowerforyou












countrymike's photo
Thu 10/16/08 06:10 PM
Argue with Merrian- Webster about definition of whore not me...
Here it is:
1: a woman who engages in sexual acts for money : prostitute ; also : a promiscuous or immoral woman2: a male who engages in sexual acts for money3: a venal or unscrupulous person

Rapunzel's photo
Thu 10/16/08 06:13 PM
Edited by Rapunzel on Thu 10/16/08 06:16 PM
drinker

I do not want to argue the point much more but there is an old saying that goes like this...in order for evil to exist ,all it takes is for good men to do nothing...
When folks get on here and condone adultery, that raises the hair on my neck as well it should...Did you or any of these people who have commented on this taught their kids that adultery is cool? And why does age make a difference?
Lead by example..
God gave us free even to break his commandments. Do not confuse free will with "it's okay" He never said adultery was a right form of living, or have I missed the page in my Bible?



very true...drinker

i agree with you , Sweetie...:heart:


i understand & agree with what you are saying drinker


but do remember flowerforyou

that we all are sinners...frown



" for all have sinned :cry:

and fallen short of the glory of God " sad



i was just saying that :smile:


until flowerforyou


we are filled with the Holy Spirit drinker


we do not recognize these things you speak of ohwell


and it is like hearing a foreign language to others :wink:



carold's photo
Thu 10/16/08 08:56 PM
Edited by carold on Thu 10/16/08 09:03 PM

I do not want to argue the point much more but there is an old saying that goes like this...in order for evil to exist ,all it takes is for good men to do nothing...
When folks get on here and condone adultery, that raises the hair on my neck as well it should...Did you or any of these people who have commented on this taught their kids that adultery is cool? And why does age make a difference?
Lead by example..
God gave us free even to break his commandments. Do not confuse free will with "it's okay" He never said adultery was a right form of living, or have I missed the page in my Bible?
I am so glad you are done with argueing. I don't know where anyone was condoning adultery. But maybe I need to look it up in webster. And I agree with you in your first post second paragraph about commitment. But this isn't the religous chat either, it is the 50's and over group we cut up and ask opinions.Name calling has no place here. And we are on a adult site. What did you think you would read here?

carold's photo
Thu 10/16/08 09:11 PM

It is hard for me to believe what I just read...The majority of the answers forgot about God ,and morals and used age as a good reason.What have we all become when we do not respect ourselves for convenience or sex or monetary reasons as Sage suggests...What ever happened to the definition of whore whether it be male or female..or is that just acceptable because it is convenient to forget about God..At our age we should be believing in Him more and more not less...
Benefits are for doing something right not wrong..(other than wall street) A committed relationship is the best sexual stimulant we could ever hope for and great sex is the reward. .Good benefits get better with security and love and peace of mind knowing that at our age we should be with the one we will be with till we pass and believing in that.
In closing I will anger some but what I will say is the truth with no excuses needed.If you want too be a whore(male or female ) do so ,but recognize it for what it is...do not make excuses ..and then color it pretty by calling it friends with benefits.



euphoriaholic's photo
Thu 10/16/08 09:17 PM
I think everyone that has posted has different interpretations of what FWB means to them. We have all went through divorce, or the lost of a spouse. So what we choose to do with our personal life at this stage of life should be our decision and whomever we are dating.Promiscious according to my dictionary means not discriminating in our choice of sexual companions. I'm sure that many on here would take offense to think you are saying that they just jump in bed without knowing the person. And what guarantees are there for being married? Does that piece of paper mean they can't cheat, lie or make your life a total hell?

PacificStar48's photo
Fri 10/17/08 03:23 AM
I agree that calling people who do not share my feelings about the loosely defined concept of FWB whores, prostitutes, or even promiscous is uncalled for and I want it clear that my decision is not a judgement of anyone elses choices as a judgement of their moral character. Commitment to me a genuine friend yes but certainly not to disqualify their right to do what they want to do in their own private sex life.

That I find a sex only relationship with a casual friend unsuitable for me or too risky for the person I might want to be with is my personal choice and NOT one that I inflict on anyone else includeing my adult children who make their own decisions.

True I want my children to be in a committed monogomous relationship to be sexually active because I beleive that will give them the best chance at health and happiness but what they do as adults is between them and their God. Just as what I do is between me and my God.

I think the charge that living together to retain entitlements your own entitlements and seperate property is prostitution is ridiculous. To me Prostitution is when you directly sell the sex act for money or material gain.

My personal defintion of adultry is when two people are in a committed relationship or marriage and they had sex with another person or persons. I do not see sex as a single person as adultry.

My whole life I have felt sex should be and experience that is physically and emotionally intimate and I am not intimate with the definition of a friend that I do not consider a mate on some level;preferably either contemplateing or actually married to that person. HOWEVER I don't should other people and if my definition of intimacy doesn't work for others that is quite alright with me that they do what is.


oldsage's photo
Fri 10/17/08 07:21 AM
win, lose or draw

I think this has been a great discussion of a very real topic for this group.

flowerforyou flowerforyou flowerforyou :thumbsup:

countrymike's photo
Fri 10/17/08 07:54 AM
Lets all agree that there is a difference of opinion because we all must be reading a different Bible and using different dictionaries..but I will add the reason we as Americans are looked down upon by most of the world is our lack of morals and our lack of Godly behavior and it shows here on a sight talking about FWB for folks over 50...I laugh at the idea that you think God rewards anyone for acts like this..
By definition this is what I found...
Whore: a promiscuous or immoral woman2: a male who engages in sexual acts for money3: a venal or unscrupulous person
Adultery: Although the legal definition of "adultery" differs in nearly every legal system, the common theme is sexual relations outside of marriage, in one form or another.

For example, New York defines an adulterer as a person who "engages in sexual intercourse with another person at a time when he has a living spouse, or the other person has a living spouse."[8] North Carolina defines adultery as when any man and woman "lewdly and lasciviously associate, bed and cohabit together."[9] Minnesota defines adultery as: "when a married woman has sexual intercourse with a man other than her husband, whether married or not, both are guilty of adultery".[10] Adultery is against the governing law of the U.S. military.[11]

Solicitation:In the United States, solicitation is a crime; it is an inchoate offense that consists of a person offering money or something else of value in order to incite or induce another to commit a crime with the specific intent that the person solicited commit the crime. The term 'solicitation' always implies some sort of commercial element (payment). Local ordinances that forbid solicitation may prevent door-to-door sales, but they cannot exclude Jehovah's Witnesses, political candidates or others who advocate a position, but do not offer or request money. Putting Fliers on a door is not soliciting. In the other common law countries, the situation is different:

prostitution: A variety of terms are used for those who engage in prostitution, some of which distinguish between different kinds, or imply a value judgment about them. Prostitute is generally accepted as the least value-laden term; common alternatives with varying implications include escort and whore. (Not all professional escorts are prostitutes, however.) Prostitution is sometimes nicknamed the "world's oldest profession".The English word whore derives from the Old English word hōra (from the Indo-European root kā meaning "desire"). Use of the word whore is widely considered pejorative, especially in its modern slang form of ho'. In Germany most prostitutes' organizations deliberately use the word Hure (whore) since they feel that prostitute is a bureaucratic term. Those seeking to remove the social stigma associated with prostitution often promote terminology such as commercial sex worker (CSW) or sex trade worker. A hooker or streetwalker solicits customers in public places; a call girl makes appointments by phone.

Call it what you may,just do not imply you are not a whore if you are engaging in acts of FWB..

oldsage's photo
Fri 10/17/08 08:08 AM
Mike, you got the last word, so let it go.

We are ALL entitled to our own opinion.


RainbowTrout's photo
Fri 10/17/08 09:09 AM
I have found friends with benefits that has nothing to do with sex.

Friends who like to drive, too so that I don't have to do all the driving.

Friends that like to go to yard sales.

Friends that can cook; I am not a good cook.

Friends that like hugs, too; I like to share hugs.

Friends that have money when I am broke and to be able to have money when my friends are broke.

countrymike's photo
Fri 10/17/08 09:13 AM
Sage ,
I have never told you to shut up and while I understand you are the "great man of knowledge" here and the mediator of sorts,please do not ask me to stop when others are prodding me with sticks..
My opinion on this will never change but there is a chance that through reading my or your opinion someone else may change their lifestyle.While you promote out of wedlock arrangements,I do not and feel it is only right to clarify definitions when needed..
knowledge is power...

Rapunzel's photo
Fri 10/17/08 09:14 AM
Edited by Rapunzel on Fri 10/17/08 09:16 AM

I have found friends with benefits that has nothing to do with sex.

Friends who like to drive, too so that I don't have to do all the driving.

Friends that like to go to yard sales.

Friends that can cook; I am not a good cook.

Friends that like hugs, too; I like to share hugs.

Friends that have money when I am broke and to be able to have money when my friends are broke.



flowerforyou yeah... rainbow trout...that is really flowerforyou


drinker the only kind of friend with benefits that i like drinker












Rapunzel's photo
Fri 10/17/08 09:17 AM

Sage ,
I have never told you to shut up and while I understand you are the "great man of knowledge" here and the mediator of sorts,please do not ask me to stop when others are prodding me with sticks..
My opinion on this will never change but there is a chance that through reading my or your opinion someone else may change their lifestyle.While you promote out of wedlock arrangements,I do not and feel it is only right to clarify definitions when needed..
knowledge is power...




drinker i'm backing you here smokin Country Mike....drinker





RainbowTrout's photo
Fri 10/17/08 09:18 AM
Rapunzel, my sponsor told me that I should be friendly with my friends. It makes sense to me. My mother told me that at an early age. She told me that if I didn't behave my friends would have to go home.laugh

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