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Topic: Dying without a relationship
no photo
Mon 10/29/12 09:00 AM
Why should a person die without a relationship?. To hell with this life.

no photo
Mon 10/29/12 09:11 AM
Excuse me?
What's your point?

pyxxie13's photo
Mon 10/29/12 09:32 AM
Not sure where you are going with this...

However, nobody should die alone. Friendships are relationships as well.

no photo
Mon 10/29/12 09:39 AM
Dude get your priorites straight!!! Many folks on here are fighting for our lives and U worry about dying with out a relationship? Maybe if U wasnt looking for an intimate encounter a LADY (which the women on this site are) and start out as friends instead would be a bit more interested in getting to know U!!!!frustrated frustrated frustrated frustrated

navygirl's photo
Mon 10/29/12 09:43 AM
Edited by navygirl on Mon 10/29/12 09:44 AM

Why should a person die without a relationship?. To hell with this life.


What is wrong with dying without a relationship? My life has never been contingent on a relationship; its about me living my life to its fullest. Personally; relationships usually suck the life out of me rather than bringing anything good to my life. When I am on my death bed; I can look back at all the fun I had rather than the regrets I had because of a relationship ruining my life. And as Pyxie said; my friends are relationships so I know they will be there for me. bigsmile

shareahug's photo
Mon 10/29/12 10:25 AM
I was looking for a spot to write this and I think maybe I found it...Ihave been married twice...22 years and 16..first ended in divorce...he was an abusive alcoholic....and the second ended just about 2 years ago through death...he had lung and bone cancer...now I am used to being married....love the partnership...I had with my second husband..I like to share and have someone to laugh and talk with and of course miss the intimacy..my 3 closest girlfriends have all passed..all young...so I am very alone....I lost my middle daughter 15 years ago...have two grown daughter and two grandchildren..they all have their own lives and we spend as much time together as possible....but I WANT MY OWN LIFE>...I have done what I should do..I have grieved, gone to support groups, taken classes, volunteered(thought I was lucky to retire at 54) ....so I feel I have a good life..all that's missing is that special someone to share with....I have met 16 men in a period of 8 months....all with issues...trust, commitment, work 90 hours a week....spend every weekend with their kids....why they are on dating sites advertising that they want to be in a relationship is beyond me...I have met liars, drunks, creeps.....each of them tells me I am prettier in person a nd look ten years younger....have a great personality (not shy, not hard to talk to)....and have a fantastic sense of humor....so what is the problem..that I cannot meet an honest man...online....in my state ...around my age...I should throw all that in..I have many men who want to fall in love online from CA ...I'm in PA...that doesn't work for me...what to do...what to do..

no photo
Mon 10/29/12 10:59 AM
You won't even know where you're gonna die or when or what from. So despite wanting a relationship. I think it's unrelated to death. Will you know you're even dying when you do?

navygirl's photo
Mon 10/29/12 11:57 AM

I was looking for a spot to write this and I think maybe I found it...Ihave been married twice...22 years and 16..first ended in divorce...he was an abusive alcoholic....and the second ended just about 2 years ago through death...he had lung and bone cancer...now I am used to being married....love the partnership...I had with my second husband..I like to share and have someone to laugh and talk with and of course miss the intimacy..my 3 closest girlfriends have all passed..all young...so I am very alone....I lost my middle daughter 15 years ago...have two grown daughter and two grandchildren..they all have their own lives and we spend as much time together as possible....but I WANT MY OWN LIFE>...I have done what I should do..I have grieved, gone to support groups, taken classes, volunteered(thought I was lucky to retire at 54) ....so I feel I have a good life..all that's missing is that special someone to share with....I have met 16 men in a period of 8 months....all with issues...trust, commitment, work 90 hours a week....spend every weekend with their kids....why they are on dating sites advertising that they want to be in a relationship is beyond me...I have met liars, drunks, creeps.....each of them tells me I am prettier in person a nd look ten years younger....have a great personality (not shy, not hard to talk to)....and have a fantastic sense of humor....so what is the problem..that I cannot meet an honest man...online....in my state ...around my age...I should throw all that in..I have many men who want to fall in love online from CA ...I'm in PA...that doesn't work for me...what to do...what to do..


Ah; you dealt with an alcoholic too, eh? I have found the same thing that its hard to meet someone who doesn't have issues; that is honest, and as you say have the time to spend with you. I think people put ads out there because they are lonely but forget that they actually have to put the time and effort; as well as honesty into a relationship. I will cross my fingers that you meet someone with some integrity as well as someone that will make the time for you. By the way; Welcome to Mingles. flowerforyou

shareahug's photo
Mon 10/29/12 12:55 PM
Thanks Navygirl...for understanding and the welcome....I'm sorry you understand...that means you've been in my shoes...waving

navygirl's photo
Mon 10/29/12 12:57 PM

Thanks Navygirl...for understanding and the welcome....I'm sorry you understand...that means you've been in my shoes...waving


Oh; I do understand. I have chronic neck pain from him hitting me from behind shortly after I was in a car accident; so I have a constant reminder of what he did to me while being drunk. I guess it could be worse; I could be dead as he did threaten to do that too.

Dodo_David's photo
Mon 10/29/12 01:04 PM

Why should a person die without a relationship?. To hell with this life.


There are all kinds of relationships. Demonstrating compassion for others is one way to develop relationships.

Bravalady's photo
Mon 10/29/12 02:26 PM

I was looking for a spot to write this and I think maybe I found it...Ihave been married twice...22 years and 16..first ended in divorce...he was an abusive alcoholic....and the second ended just about 2 years ago through death...he had lung and bone cancer...now I am used to being married....love the partnership...I had with my second husband..I like to share and have someone to laugh and talk with and of course miss the intimacy..my 3 closest girlfriends have all passed..all young...so I am very alone....I lost my middle daughter 15 years ago...have two grown daughter and two grandchildren..they all have their own lives and we spend as much time together as possible....but I WANT MY OWN LIFE>...I have done what I should do..I have grieved, gone to support groups, taken classes, volunteered(thought I was lucky to retire at 54) ....so I feel I have a good life..all that's missing is that special someone to share with....I have met 16 men in a period of 8 months....all with issues...trust, commitment, work 90 hours a week....spend every weekend with their kids....why they are on dating sites advertising that they want to be in a relationship is beyond me...I have met liars, drunks, creeps.....each of them tells me I am prettier in person a nd look ten years younger....have a great personality (not shy, not hard to talk to)....and have a fantastic sense of humor....so what is the problem..that I cannot meet an honest man...online....in my state ...around my age...I should throw all that in..I have many men who want to fall in love online from CA ...I'm in PA...that doesn't work for me...what to do...what to do..


Yeah, it's much harder to actually maintain a relationship than to advertise for one. Welcome and good luck--it sounds like you have your priorities straight, and I honestly think that with a little luck you could find another who can be come "the one."

wux's photo
Mon 10/29/12 04:58 PM
I lived all my life alone. This means that I am a one-horse-cart, a one-pony-show.

If I can live alone, how hard is it going to be to die alone?

I understand that it is going to make a difference on the other side. If you killed some people in this life, they will be your slaves forever on the far side of death. Or if you ate pig meat or cow meat, you may come back as a gnat. Also, this is also true, if you lived a pious life, you will go to heaven and sing hozhannas and suzannas to praise the lord, coz he's a guy who can't get enough of that.

So given all that, I don't give a fish. Die alone, die while engaged in a very sexually satisfying and exciting, mind-blowing relationship, is all the same to me.

"Gimme liberty or gimme Milka hazelnut milk chocolate bars."

wux's photo
Mon 10/29/12 05:10 PM
Bravalady, Navygirl and shareahug,

well, you want an alcohol-free, honest man. I am honest as it gets, I speak my mind, I say in my profile I'm 5'4", fat, very fat, and poor. I don't drive, I don't have a job, and I'm mentally ill.

You can't get any f ing more honest than that.

So it is not actually honesty that you want, I call you out on that. You want honesty, AND a man who is, to your expectations, worthy of your love. Maybe have some money, be established, have a straight life, have the American dream accomplished.

That's fine, I have nothing against that, your preference, it's okay with me.

But please cut out the whining that you can't find an honest man. Honest man will tell the truth, and therefore he will never be a successful man. No boss, no woman, nobody likes to hear the truth. Heck, not even I like to hear the stuff that comes out of my mouth most of the time.

If you want an honest man, you will get an arrogant boor who is a moody cynic. If you want an established man, with a good, steady lifestyle, you won't get honesty. Maybe you will get a pleasant life, a good life, a happy life, but honesty has nothing to do with that.

Honesty and telling the truth is the pits. Stop whining about "dishonest guys", because you reject the honest AND the dishonest alike. There are totally different criteria you want in a man who can be your future partner, and that's fine, but don't call that quality "honesty".

I say this because with all my bad and good qualities and attributes, I am proud of being honest. It's nothing to be so cocky about, but it is MINE, and I am a rare man in this. I got disdain and jeering all my life for being honest, and yet I stuck with it.

Therefore I take honesty seriously, I don't want you to toss this word around meaninglessly. This is my sanctity. My quality that I uphold, not because it's such a hoo-hoo-hot quality, but because it's mine. I have it and I practice it.

This is the reason I beg you to use a different cover-word of describing a man in one single word that you want. Say tall, rich, good, dependable, anything, I won't mind, but please, please, don't use "honest" because that is what describes ME, and ME only, vis-a-vis the men from which you want one for yourself.

It is an insult to me when a woman who has rejected me a hundred times says "I want an honest man." It is ludicrous, hypocratical, phillistyne, and two-faced.

So please go and find a different word, don't use "honest", please, because that's a direct insult to me, and furthermore a complete lie you are uttering.

Maerz2803's photo
Mon 10/29/12 05:14 PM
Edited by Maerz2803 on Mon 10/29/12 05:15 PM

or gimme Milka hazelnut milk chocolate bars."


happy

With raisins it's even better

Maerz2803's photo
Mon 10/29/12 05:19 PM

Bravalady, Navygirl and shareahug,

well, you want an alcohol-free, honest man. I am honest as it gets, I speak my mind, I say in my profile I'm 5'4", fat, very fat, and poor. I don't drive, I don't have a job, and I'm mentally ill.

You can't get any f ing more honest than that.

So it is not actually honesty that you want, I call you out on that. You want honesty, AND a man who is, to your expectations, worthy of your love. Maybe have some money, be established, have a straight life, have the American dream accomplished.

That's fine, I have nothing against that, your preference, it's okay with me.

But please cut out the whining that you can't find an honest man. Honest man will tell the truth, and therefore he will never be a successful man. No boss, no woman, nobody likes to hear the truth. Heck, not even I like to hear the stuff that comes out of my mouth most of the time.

If you want an honest man, you will get an arrogant boor who is a moody cynic. If you want an established man, with a good, steady lifestyle, you won't get honesty. Maybe you will get a pleasant life, a good life, a happy life, but honesty has nothing to do with that.

Honesty and telling the truth is the pits. Stop whining about "dishonest guys", because you reject the honest AND the dishonest alike. There are totally different criteria you want in a man who can be your future partner, and that's fine, but don't call that quality "honesty".

I say this because with all my bad and good qualities and attributes, I am proud of being honest. It's nothing to be so cocky about, but it is MINE, and I am a rare man in this. I got disdain and jeering all my life for being honest, and yet I stuck with it.

Therefore I take honesty seriously, I don't want you to toss this word around meaninglessly. This is my sanctity. My quality that I uphold, not because it's such a hoo-hoo-hot quality, but because it's mine. I have it and I practice it.

This is the reason I beg you to use a different cover-word of describing a man in one single word that you want. Say tall, rich, good, dependable, anything, I won't mind, but please, please, don't use "honest" because that is what describes ME, and ME only, vis-a-vis the men from which you want one for yourself.

It is an insult to me when a woman who has rejected me a hundred times says "I want an honest man." It is ludicrous, hypocratical, phillistyne, and two-faced.

So please go and find a different word, don't use "honest", please, because that's a direct insult to me, and furthermore a complete lie you are uttering.


Wux, maybe you could accept the term sincere then?

wux's photo
Mon 10/29/12 05:24 PM

Dude get your priorites straight!!! Many folks on here are fighting for our lives and U worry about dying with out a relationship? Maybe if U wasnt looking for an intimate encounter a LADY (which the women on this site are) and start out as friends instead would be a bit more interested in getting to know U!!!!frustrated frustrated frustrated frustrated


What brought this out, Mikey? Is there any logical or emotional connection between your message and the first opening post?

If there is, I fail to see it. You are treating, it seems to me, relationhsips, loving, caring relationships, as if they were "a fair day's wage for a fair day's work", and nothing less, nothing more. You are saying many of us are fighting for our lives. Are we? Many of us? How many of us?

You are blasting a guy because s/he is letting a cry out into the great beyond about his or her loneliness. So... that's a sin, because he (let's call him a he, it's easier to type) is not fighting for his life, and he's looking for an intimate hook-up with a LADY (oh, this is so much "My **** don't smell" crap) whereas he did not say any of that, here, on the post, did he?

He is afraid of death and dying alone. Why is that so offensive to you? Do you have any insight of what other's lives are worth, and how deep their emotions run? Or is it only people in your situation, whatever it is, I don't know you, that have "earned" their keep to stay alive on this globe?

What is it that gives you the idea that you are so superior morally to others, that if, like the OP, one cries for help, you have the authority and the right and the might to put him down for not dying? How do you KNOW he is not dying? Are we not a bit presumptuous? I am not sure if the op is dying or not, but you seem to be.

"The world is divided into two groups: the righteous and the non-righteous. And it is always the righteous who do the dividing."

wux's photo
Mon 10/29/12 05:26 PM

Wux, maybe you could accept the term sincere then?

I'll see what I can do, Maerz. Let me get back to you on that, please.

Maerz2803's photo
Mon 10/29/12 05:36 PM


Wux, maybe you could accept the term sincere then?

I'll see what I can do, Maerz. Let me get back to you on that, please.

Please DO!!!

no photo
Mon 10/29/12 06:16 PM
Edited by Rawrr_Girl on Mon 10/29/12 06:17 PM


Dude get your priorites straight!!! Many folks on here are fighting for our lives and U worry about dying with out a relationship? Maybe if U wasnt looking for an intimate encounter a LADY (which the women on this site are) and start out as friends instead would be a bit more interested in getting to know U!!!!frustrated frustrated frustrated frustrated


What brought this out, Mikey? Is there any logical or emotional connection between your message and the first opening post?
I think what Mikey is trying to get across, is to be grateful for what you have. If you don't have a debilitating illness, or other major life worries, then you're blessed enough to be living within your means. Am I right, Mikey?


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