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Topic: Do you care what other people think of you?
peggy122's photo
Sun 06/11/17 08:20 AM
Do you care what other people think of you?

Whose opinion has enough power to influence your actions?

Gabriel51090's photo
Sun 06/11/17 08:34 AM
honestly i dont care, when elephant walk on streets he dont care about dpgs barking

no photo
Sun 06/11/17 08:44 AM
I have never been influenced by anyones opinions,I have not met hardly anyone in the city I live in, And the dating profile I posted is all there is about me no lies,I am always honest about me life and people I meet and have never understood how anyone could lie about anything theres only one life after birth, some people do naturally only speak truth some people lie about one another, I never attempt to assume nor have I spoke guess type of stuff about the Personal life facts of anyone, if I hear of a assumer its just one more person I could never be a friend with I only speak to honest people its socially fair to only be friends with honest people, and I have never spoke a word about anyone that is not about the persons life or identity during my life I am always honest and honesty is a naturally easy part of Life .

Tom4Uhere's photo
Sun 06/11/17 08:45 AM
Absolutely not.

Many people influence my actions with their opinions.
Not necessarily their opinions of me tho.

People around us come and go but the only constant is ourselves.

Its possible to have strong self-esteem without being narcissistic.
Its possible to be empathetic without being oppressive.
Its possible to be considerate without being manipulated.

Everyone seems to want to be liked, wanted.
Its possible to be liked without a consuming need to be liked.

People either like me as I am or they don't.
The life I live is my own.
If I live to try to please others I am living their impression of who I am not my own.

It is way harder to live to someone else's expectations.
Life is hard enough, why make it harder?

IgorFrankensteen's photo
Sun 06/11/17 08:48 AM
This is another one of those "yes, no, it depends" things.

Yes, in the sense that what people think of me can mechanically affect what I can do in life. If my boss dislikes me, I'm not likely to prosper at work.

No, in the sense that I learned the hard way, that I can't pretend to be someone other than who I am, when I'm in a mate-relationship.

Overall, that means that there's no one who can influence me to try to be who I'm not. When I discover someone does NOT like who I am, I adjust my life, so that I have minimal contact with them. Their disapproval doesn't cause me to try to change. But whenever I am in someone else's life, such as visiting at their house, society, place of business, I will cater to their customs as best I can, as a fundamental sign of my respect for others.

TMommy's photo
Sun 06/11/17 08:56 AM
hmmmm not as much as when I was young
which gives me hope that it will be even less as I get older

no photo
Sun 06/11/17 09:20 AM
yes i care about the opinion people have of me

Tom4Uhere's photo
Sun 06/11/17 09:22 AM
Human beings are social creatures. A society is a group of two or more in alignment. In a social group of any size there is always an influence that creates the alignment.

We can be influenced to start a behavoir or end a behavior. The start of a new behavior or the end of an old behavior can be influenced in many ways but the ultimate decision to change is individual and personal.

I don't like using my phone.
I have had a few people that try to make me use my phone by implying they will like me more or if I don't then they won't like me.
I do not change my own actions for approval of others.
It is MY decision.

Think back when you were in high school.
How many times did you do something you did not want to do because it gained someone else's approval?
Then think about those times when that action change resulted in someone else's disapproval.
How did you personally feel about it?
Who mattered more, you or someone else?

I was just thinking about this very subject a few days ago and almost posted a topic on it. I didn't because I felt others could not relate and the few that do, would not respond.

My thoughts were focused on the reasons why we do things.

The question I was going to offer was
"What do we really HAVE TO DO in life?"

When you think about it you realise there are really not many things we have to do.
** Be influenced by gravity
** Exist on this planet
** Die

Everything else is our own decision.

Some would argue things like
Work - I have to work
Breathe - I have to breathe
Be socially accepted
Be loved or liked
The list could go on forvever and still not name every example.

There are more things that we must agree to do than those that we have to do.
I have to live. Well, technically, you don't HAVE TO live.
I have to work so I can afford to live. Again technically you can live without money, you just don't want to.

When we change ourselves because we HAVE TO be liked or loved it is not an inevitablility, it is a decision we make within ourselves.
All the things we do, we do because we decide to do them. The things we don't do are not done because we decided not to do them.
If you are influenced by others, that influence only changes you if you allow it.

Acceptance is the continuity of a society. We choose which socieies we wish to align with and then take actions to make it so.

Chinh6978's photo
Sun 06/11/17 09:25 AM

Human beings are social creatures. A society is a group of two or more in alignment. In a social group of any size there is always an influence that creates the alignment.

We can be influenced to start a behavoir or end a behavior. The start of a new behavior or the end of an old behavior can be influenced in many ways but the ultimate decision to change is individual and personal.

I don't like using my phone.
I have had a few people that try to make me use my phone by implying they will like me more or if I don't then they won't like me.
I do not change my own actions for approval of others.
It is MY decision.

Think back when you were in high school.
How many times did you do something you did not want to do because it gained someone else's approval?
Then think about those times when that action change resulted in someone else's disapproval.
How did you personally feel about it?
Who mattered more, you or someone else?

I was just thinking about this very subject a few days ago and almost posted a topic on it. I didn't because I felt others could not relate and the few that do, would not respond.

My thoughts were focused on the reasons why we do things.

The question I was going to offer was
"What do we really HAVE TO DO in life?"

When you think about it you realise there are really not many things we have to do.
** Be influenced by gravity
** Exist on this planet
** Die

Everything else is our own decision.

Some would argue things like
Work - I have to work
Breathe - I have to breathe
Be socially accepted
Be loved or liked
The list could go on forvever and still not name every example.

There are more things that we must agree to do than those that we have to do.
I have to live. Well, technically, you don't HAVE TO live.
I have to work so I can afford to live. Again technically you can live without money, you just don't want to.

When we change ourselves because we HAVE TO be liked or loved it is not an inevitablility, it is a decision we make within ourselves.
All the things we do, we do because we decide to do them. The things we don't do are not done because we decided not to do them.
If you are influenced by others, that influence only changes you if you allow it.

Acceptance is the continuity of a society. We choose which socieies we wish to align with and then take actions to make it so.


SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Sun 06/11/17 09:45 AM
Like Igor said, depends... for me on the who, where, why, what, when.
If I'm feeling a little insecure in a situation and get criticized, it will hit me harder than when I'm feeling totally confident.

Getting me to change my actions would likely be from ppl I love the most, mostly a partner. But even then it depends. I will not change who I am simply because something displeases him. If he has a good point however, I will think about it and could very well decide to try and change that particular thing. I call that being flexible and willing to compromise.
But if someone would try to change the essence of me, no way.

soufiehere's photo
Sun 06/11/17 09:56 AM
Edited by soufiehere on Sun 06/11/17 09:57 AM

Do you care what other people think of you?
Basically, yes. Though not enough to
influence my opinions beyond facts.

Whose opinion has enough power to influence your actions?
Pretty much just my own.

no photo
Sun 06/11/17 09:59 AM


Do you care what other people think of you?
Basically, yes. Though not enough to
influence my opinions beyond facts.

Whose opinion has enough power to influence your actions?
Pretty much just my own.



flowerforyou

Beachfarmer's photo
Sun 06/11/17 10:40 AM
I guess I said in the "Too Old" thread that I wouldn't feel comfortable in a
20 something club, with a stamp on my hand.

Aside from disinterest, I DO feel it's a bit undignified.

So the platitude of not caring what anyone thinks no matter what wouldn't be "completely" honest???...but pretty close :-p

no photo
Sun 06/11/17 09:07 PM
I use to, long ago, but then I excepted that no one I found even remotely attractive wants anything to do with me. After that epiphany I became less stressed and happier. If someone doesn't like me they can get in line with all the other people I've known.

dreamerana's photo
Sun 06/11/17 09:19 PM
Sometimes

no photo
Sun 06/11/17 09:31 PM

Do you care what other people think of you?

Whose opinion has enough power to influence your actions?


I care about what my family and close friends would think about me. But I don't let anybody allow to have the power to influence my actions. I have a mind of my own, yes, I listen to criticisms or opinions of others and I weigh it. But I only take the positive things which I believe could help me but I don't let anyone decide for me. If I do something it is because I want to do it not for anybody but only for me .

Snoman1951's photo
Mon 06/12/17 03:16 AM
If only I cared then maybe I'd change...
But I don't so I won't...just let me be me

peggy122's photo
Mon 06/12/17 04:13 AM

honestly i dont care, when elephant walk on streets he dont care about dpgs barking


You re right gabriel. An elephant couldng care less about barking dogs lol

peggy122's photo
Mon 06/12/17 04:13 AM

honestly i dont care, when elephant walk on streets he dont care about dpgs barking


You re right gabriel. An elephant couldng care less about barking dogs lol

peggy122's photo
Mon 06/12/17 04:16 AM

I have never been influenced by anyones opinions,I have not met hardly anyone in the city I live in, And the dating profile I posted is all there is about me no lies,I am always honest about me life and people I meet and have never understood how anyone could lie about anything theres only one life after birth, some people do naturally only speak truth some people lie about one another, I never attempt to assume nor have I spoke guess type of stuff about the Personal life facts of anyone, if I hear of a assumer its just one more person I could never be a friend with I only speak to honest people its socially fair to only be friends with honest people, and I have never spoke a word about anyone that is not about the persons life or identity during my life I am always honest and honesty is a naturally easy part of Life .


You march to yhe beat of your own drum justinlove. That must be quite liberating :)

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