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Topic: Alone forever ?
NickQ944's photo
Tue 11/17/20 04:05 PM
Someone please help
I've been alone since my ex left me been alone for 8 years now I just need help just need happiness back in my life some days the depression is too hard to deal with some days just go by I just want someone by my side is that so much to ask for . . NYC area Male I'm just an artist loner hit my dm females all dm open

no photo
Tue 11/17/20 04:12 PM
Hey mate, I know the one. Haven't been in a long term relationship myself ever in this life

SparklingCrystal ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’Ž's photo
Tue 11/17/20 04:19 PM
Very understandable, but the thing is no one else can take your pain away and make you happy but you. Now you're looking for an outside patch, which is like a drug: it will make you feel good for a short while, then you need more, and more, and more.
It doesn't heal or change anything as the problem isn't on the outside but within.

Nor can and will you find a great healthy relationship because you aren't in the right place for that when you feel depressed, in pain, and unhappy. You cannot create nor receive happiness when you're there.
So... if you want to find great love find happiness on your own first and love yourself first. Only then can you find love because then you're ready for it.

NickQ944's photo
Tue 11/17/20 05:01 PM
I know that's true I'm just tired of being alone and I'm so anti social

Mike6615's photo
Tue 11/17/20 05:59 PM

I know that's true I'm just tired of being alone and I'm so anti social


You should consider some professional help. Good Luck with it!

phoebetbh's photo
Tue 11/17/20 07:31 PM
Maybe a pet especially dog will be good to accompany you and keep you busy instead of the feeling of loneliness?

no photo
Tue 11/17/20 07:44 PM
Hi nick ...

Depression and antisocial escapism can be a bad combination . If you truly want to meet someone you need to find the motivation and put in some effort . social media Is a good place to start and at least you can control the level of interaction . Your interest as an artist should help put you in touch with others who share your passion . Hang in there and well done for dipping your toes in the dating water lol waving

Tom4Uhere's photo
Tue 11/17/20 08:58 PM

Very understandable, but the thing is no one else can take your pain away and make you happy but you. Now you're looking for an outside patch, which is like a drug: it will make you feel good for a short while, then you need more, and more, and more.
It doesn't heal or change anything as the problem isn't on the outside but within.

Nor can and will you find a great healthy relationship because you aren't in the right place for that when you feel depressed, in pain, and unhappy. You cannot create nor receive happiness when you're there.
So... if you want to find great love find happiness on your own first and love yourself first. Only then can you find love because then you're ready for it.

Hit the nail square on the head! Blondey Too!
:thumbsup:

I personally dealt with depression and the anxiety over being alone for a long period.
Depression is a monster you feed. If you stop feeding it, it will go away.
Look into building HEALTHY self-esteem as well.
Anti-social and social distancing are two different things.
In NYC, the pandemic has taken a heavy toll on social life.
Its not the same as being anti-social but consider this, many artists are anti-social and a bit quirky.

Gaining healthy self-esteem can help you get a grip on the depression you feel. You should also try not to be so hard on yourself about things that really don't matter.
Once you get that inner smile you will attract potential mates.

Its a hard cliff to climb but it does get easier as you make progress. With each inner victory you will gain self-assurance and that appeals to people.
I wish you luck.
waving

Now, the flip-side:
Playing the 'pitiful' is not a very good strategy for getting laid. Women want strong, sure men not a whimpered child requiring all their time and energy. I'm not saying this is what you are doing but it has been and still is done quite a bit.

Pramod R.'s photo
Tue 11/17/20 09:00 PM
absolutely right

no photo
Wed 11/18/20 05:50 PM
This is very much true

no photo
Wed 11/18/20 05:53 PM


Very understandable, but the thing is no one else can take your pain away and make you happy but you. Now you're looking for an outside patch, which is like a drug: it will make you feel good for a short while, then you need more, and more, and more.
It doesn't heal or change anything as the problem isn't on the outside but within.

Nor can and will you find a great healthy relationship because you aren't in the right place for that when you feel depressed, in pain, and unhappy. You cannot create nor receive happiness when you're there.
So... if you want to find great love find happiness on your own first and love yourself first. Only then can you find love because then you're ready for it.

Hit the nail square on the head! Blondey Too!
:thumbsup:

I personally dealt with depression and the anxiety over being alone for a long period.
Depression is a monster you feed. If you stop feeding it, it will go away.
Look into building HEALTHY self-esteem as well.
Anti-social and social distancing are two different things.
In NYC, the pandemic has taken a heavy toll on social life.
Its not the same as being anti-social but consider this, many artists are anti-social and a bit quirky.

Gaining healthy self-esteem can help you get a grip on the depression you feel. You should also try not to be so hard on yourself about things that really don't matter.
Once you get that inner smile you will attract potential mates.

Its a hard cliff to climb but it does get easier as you make progress. With each inner victory you will gain self-assurance and that appeals to people.
I wish you luck.
waving

Now, the flip-side:
Playing the 'pitiful' is not a very good strategy for getting laid. Women want strong, sure men not a whimpered child requiring all their time and energy. I'm not saying this is what you are doing but it has been and still is done quite a bit.
I agree with this

Toodygirl5's photo
Thu 11/19/20 05:03 PM
Edited by Toodygirl5 on Thu 11/19/20 05:04 PM
Virus has put a stop on many men's social life.

Online is not the best venue for friends.

Look around in your Area.

no photo
Fri 11/20/20 07:25 AM
right

1SINGLEINSUFFOLK's photo
Fri 11/20/20 09:13 PM
your post makes me think you should read MGTOW for men....maybe thats for you

Duttoneer's photo
Sat 11/21/20 05:58 AM

If you are feeling very lonely, unloved and unwanted.

Stop paying all your bills for a few weeks.

laugh


LarchTree's photo
Sat 11/21/20 09:27 AM
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=e5hXtGkzZ9k

bobtail76's photo
Sat 11/21/20 11:50 AM


If you are feeling very lonely, unloved and unwanted.

Stop paying all your bills for a few weeks.

laugh




laugh

Cutiepieforyou's photo
Sat 11/21/20 12:00 PM


If you are feeling very lonely, unloved and unwanted.

Stop paying all your bills for a few weeks.

laugh




laugh

mysticalview21's photo
Sun 11/22/20 07:23 AM
Edited by mysticalview21 on Sun 11/22/20 07:25 AM

Someone please help
I've been alone since my ex left me been alone for 8 years now I just need help just need happiness back in my life some days the depression is too hard to deal with some days just go by I just want someone by my side is that so much to ask for . . NYC area Male I'm just an artist loner hit my dm females all dm open



It is hard to say to someone that is lonely... what to do ...
but as others have said ...find something that interest you ...
and work on you first... I know it is hard as h*ll to be alone ...
but better to be alone then put yourself in a relationship ...just so you don't want to be alone ... you may get hurt again ... be you ... and then you may find the right person ... again is very hard now since covid decided to take over our live ... just got to push yourself through ... stay in the forum for a while ... sometimes better to not feel your alone... if your in here TCBS... ...smile2

EliasTrueBlue's photo
Sun 11/22/20 09:25 AM
I have been alone a lot and most of the time I'm fine with it. I live alone in a large suburb house and mostly read in between my routines. Take zero medications and am well grounded....if the dating site women want a serious LT relationship, I'm ready to chat first.

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