Whenever you start to talk to a girl or a woman...she talks about what she likes and dislikes and how she wants her guy to be...then if you talk highly about her she will be happy and go along otherwise its her way or the highway... that's self centered to me.

Not all women are the same and you shouldn’t tar us all with the same brush! But believe me it works both ways as some men can also be self centred.

We are all individual and as such should be judged on our own merits and not discredited on others failings.

That's just some people m8. Or perhaps just a phase.

It may appear to be self-centered, and in some cases it is. However, when you are first meeting someone who is a potential date, of course she, and he, ought to talk about their likes and dislikes and what they are looking for as far as a potential mate. Later, if you both find there's chemistry and a connection, then you can discuss in what ways you're willing to compromise, it becomes more about "us" as a couple. Til then, yeah, it's usually all about me... meaning all about preferences of the individual, both the man and the woman.

Zach, is this the kind of woman you are talking about?

Your profile: "Profession: everybody bow to me" and you think SHE is
self-centered?

Narcissistic personality disorder involves a pattern of self-centered, arrogant thinking and behavior, a lack of empathy and consideration for other people, and an excessive need for admiration. Others often describe people with NPD as cocky, manipulative, selfish, patronizing, and demanding.

I think its amusing how narcissistic people attract narcissistic people, then complain about it.

Also, a person with healthy self-esteem doesn't need to build themselves up for other people. They are usually secure in their own identity.

I once had a boss who was narcissistic and had low self-esteem. The 'best, fastest' way to get him to do what I wanted was to play that out so he thought it was his idea.





The whole point of the courtship process is to discover the nature of the person you are courting. To build a familiar bond by understanding what makes them, them.
Online, you only get a limited range of signals and most of those signals must be shared by self-description.
In person, body language can tell you if someone is or isn't interested but online limits must be told and often emphasized repeatedly. Some people can be really dense.

When I'm interested in someone I want to know everything I can about them. Since I didn't live with them or experience their lives, I rely on them to tell me. Likewise, when they are not interested, I rely on them to tell me, just as they rely on me to tell them. Otherwise, its all a waste of time and effort.

If yer just looking to get laid, rent a hooker and let the money do the talkin...

Why is there never any cheese served with these whines????

It appears, to be a cheesy whine.

Why not ?

I just love a whine and cheese party

Get some brie and crackers. I'll bring a bottle and be over in five minutes.

Bow at her feet regardless and be thankful for either the key to her heart or the savings of time; and if it leads somewhere hope the communication continues....

because if 2 years later I got the "you know what you did" line, THAT's when I would get upset

Sure must be a difference between Pakistan women (your area) and other places in the world.

Why shouldn't they be?

The only real problem with being "self centered" is when they start to complain about it, can't understand why they aren't getting what they want, feel entitled to it, and try to make it the responsibility of others.

IOW "where are all the good ones? Where are all the nice ones? Guys/girls need to step up their game, they're all (x)!"

Doesn't really matter if it's male or female.



That's just the consumer mindset.
When you encounter that with someone you talk to, in general, it's pretty much a sign that they aren't that attracted to you.

When women, in general, are really attracted to you they're driven by things like their "tingles! tee hee," and will follow a less rational approach.

If she's specifically speaking to you directly about what she likes, dislikes, and how she wants her guy to be (iow it's not just listed in her profile), she's taking a rational approach, which means she's just not that attracted to you/your picture.
The less so, the more likely any minor thing is going to reinforce the urge to find something better, to go to the next choice.
At best she's measuring you for some benefit you represent towards some larger goal.

It's how women shop.
Impulse purchases (OMG! I just saw these shoes and I had to have them!) vs. planned purchases (I am going hiking so do you have boots that have/do/offer x,y,z,p,d,q, and your customer service better be good or no commission for you and I'm not coming back, let me speak to the manager).


Promotion of consumerism for the last century or so, and turning people into drones that basically work, spend, consume, repeat or complain to anything that interrupts that pattern.
Retraining people so when they feel any kind of "want" or "desire" it means anything that is perceived to fulfill that turns into a "store," and they interact with it that way. As the consumer, and the other person is the salesperson for the "store."


Of course you could also go into people with a net worth requiring shopping at walmart, demanding the selection, quality, and service of neiman marcus.



Because those are lazy minded shortcuts. Over time those shortcuts will become shortcuts of shortcuts of shortcuts that you won't question. They'll just become immediate negative emotional reactions that you don't question.
Then you'll spend more time looking to corroborate/validate them.
Let's say that 99% of (x) is the same. "Weeding" through that 99% takes time. You are trained on how to spot the 99%. When that 1% comes along, you'll focus more on trying to prove that 1% is like that 99%, you'll only really focus on how that 1% is like that 99%. As that's all you've trained yourself to do.
i.e. Law of the instrument. "when all you have is a hammer, you'll treat everything like a nail."

she is the prize......men compartmentalize ,,,,for women everything is

connected....we are not the same animal we can not use our yard stick to

measure and judge women.....the first mistake is we try to see the sense she

is making us.....what is needed is to see the sense she is making to her self

and how her mind works....that's how we get to know and understand others...

Zach, it'd be really nice to dream of a day when we become "selfless"! Till then lets accept the reality and move on...