Topic: Feminism
shareahug's photo
Mon 11/05/12 06:46 AM


Oh Green Eyes ..how right you are....out of all the men I have met face to face in the past 8 months..nothing has gone beyond a second date.... ...Yes I do agree...with all you've said...I found most of these men talk about leaving all baggage, drama and old issues behind...but they are the ones who have it all...they put words in your mouth...I just sit dumbfounded sometimes....LOL....at the stupidity in what other hear being so different from what you've said......but I think I've learned alot here...I appreciate all of you who have the maturity and compassion to be able to read a profile and see it all clearly and not look for hidden messages..because I don't have any..I don't have an agenda with men either.....thanks all..


What are you really trying to say? waving



LMao! Hiker....am I that blunt???:banana:

Gossipmpm's photo
Mon 11/05/12 06:53 AM
i am a feminist


why?

because i love and care about women!

i also love men who are feminists:heart:

EquusDancer's photo
Tue 11/06/12 02:36 PM





Since when did independent/independence become the definition for feminism?....Feminism is about "defining and establishing" EQUAL RIGHTS for women as they DIRECTLY relate to men's rights socially, politically, and economically!...Independence is the PRICE TAG women pay for this equality, which, FYI, is still not fully achieved...

If men and women are secure within themselves, feminism should only serve to enhance their relationships with each other....whoa
I agree!...Back in the 60's and 70's many women fought for "fair custody rights" for fathers after a divorce. This was an important issue for me...I didn't want to see kids deprived of time with their fathers...And a lot of men supported equal rights and better pay for women...How can we push for positive changes in society (for everyone) if we're bogged down in silly "tit for tat" kind of games? And never bother to look for "common ground?"


Speaking peer to peer, yes, yes, yes!...The game of "tit for tat" is child's play....

I agree with what you wrote about being secure too...A secure man doesn't want or need a "shadow" or a "cheerleader." Or a "little woman" by his side to make him look "tall!"


Yes, so true...I found many of the posts troubling because there seems to be a lot of misunderstanding about feminism and HOW and WHY the feminist movement(s) came about...In order to continue to effect positive change, understanding by both men and women is vital...Unfortunately, women are still fighting for equal ground, especially in the workplace and the political arena...This makes it doubly important for our young men and women to have a clear and concise understanding of feminism and how it benefits society as a whole....Women have much to contribute....Their contribution to society should not be limited to that of homemaker, wife, and mother...In fact, time has proven that the traditional household is becoming a luxury most modern families can no longer afford....


Random pop-up from out of the blue! I luv you both! happy Beautifully said!

EquusDancer's photo
Tue 11/06/12 02:36 PM

i am a feminist


why?

because i love and care about women!

i also love men who are feminists:heart:


Ditto!

SpicyExcel's photo
Tue 11/06/12 03:15 PM
The changes that have developed over the last 150 years' men needed to look at what's important. As feminism developed (after the war) for independence/equality family bases deteriorated for a justifiable reason. This is no fault of either gender, but to develope a society where men can feel that there wife or daughter has a chance to survive with out harm. It took both geneders to change things and both were educated at the time. Some with wealth others not so wealthy.

As moderen day society developed men (in general) realized that some day something may happened that will leave there wife and children alone and who would take care of them.

Inflation sky-rocketed which meant duel income was needed to survive just to maintain one house hold. What was this caused by? The people who were just trying to survive. Then we need to look at family court and what has developed through that system.

Parents in the past educated there children to be two things: boys to be men and girls to be soft (simplistic explination). Men are to take responsibility for all serious errors because that is what a man does. It keeps' women safe and from harm.

This type of change is slow its' part of human innateness to survive in all humans. Before we had a broad intelligence man hunted generally and the woman prepared. Its' all about animal instinct and it's not going to change in just a few hundred years. Man's past need to protect is a loss of their ability to provide; with independence and equality.

Feminism is not so much different that children trying to develope rights for themselves so they feel protected (Child Protection Act) and have a voice. It's taken less time than feminism has.

no photo
Fri 11/09/12 09:53 AM

Is this the fundamental reason why some men like to chase and women enjoy playing hard to get in return? Seems to be a lot of the reason a man feels he has to work hard to get "the prize." Whatever happened to passion in relationships anymore? Has this drained out because women stopped being "women" or rather "self sufficient" and can make their own decisions, their own money, have a choice in a guy? I was thinking this could explain a lot of what is really going with broken relationships lately. Today's woman is very different from what she was in the 20s on to about the late 60s. Seems like it could be a factor in the demise in a lot of relationships.

Guys, are you bothered by a feminist?

Your reasoning is faulty. "The prize" just may not be worth as much as you value it. A strong, independent woman is truly a prize. A domineering controlling ***** is not. Seek balance including between men and women and there will be no need for labels.

willowdraga's photo
Fri 11/09/12 10:05 AM
It is a role change. Man ruled society dictated that women were of the submissive role. Men being born with a penis meant he was the dominant and women submitted. Men working and women not, allowed for a continuation of the dominance because a woman couldn't really do anything without his knowledge and approval unless she got it for free or in a trade of some kind.

Women have now taken the control ie money, job, education, social status to a more equal level, not all the way yet but more and it has upset the status quo.

But men are learning that we need them, not as our daddies but as good, hard working, respect inspiring, fellow companies on this trip through life. We stand next to them with our own bank account, job, community respect, etc... just as they have always had. Equal, yet different.

Ladylid2012's photo
Fri 11/09/12 10:55 AM
Edited by Ladylid2012 on Fri 11/09/12 10:57 AM
Much confusion on what feminism is...as stated in previous posts.

As long as people find humor in rape jokes...feminism is needed.
As long as girls and women are abused and mutilated ALL over the world, feminism is needed.
As long as little girls think " him pulling my hair means he likes me"...feminism is needed.

Man hating is about that..hating men.
Feminism has nothing to do with hating and or not needing men.

no photo
Fri 11/09/12 12:20 PM






Since when did independent/independence become the definition for feminism?....Feminism is about "defining and establishing" EQUAL RIGHTS for women as they DIRECTLY relate to men's rights socially, politically, and economically!...Independence is the PRICE TAG women pay for this equality, which, FYI, is still not fully achieved...

If men and women are secure within themselves, feminism should only serve to enhance their relationships with each other....whoa
I agree!...Back in the 60's and 70's many women fought for "fair custody rights" for fathers after a divorce. This was an important issue for me...I didn't want to see kids deprived of time with their fathers...And a lot of men supported equal rights and better pay for women...How can we push for positive changes in society (for everyone) if we're bogged down in silly "tit for tat" kind of games? And never bother to look for "common ground?"


Speaking peer to peer, yes, yes, yes!...The game of "tit for tat" is child's play....

I agree with what you wrote about being secure too...A secure man doesn't want or need a "shadow" or a "cheerleader." Or a "little woman" by his side to make him look "tall!"


Yes, so true...I found many of the posts troubling because there seems to be a lot of misunderstanding about feminism and HOW and WHY the feminist movement(s) came about...In order to continue to effect positive change, understanding by both men and women is vital...Unfortunately, women are still fighting for equal ground, especially in the workplace and the political arena...This makes it doubly important for our young men and women to have a clear and concise understanding of feminism and how it benefits society as a whole....Women have much to contribute....Their contribution to society should not be limited to that of homemaker, wife, and mother...In fact, time has proven that the traditional household is becoming a luxury most modern families can no longer afford....


Random pop-up from out of the blue! I luv you both! happy Beautifully said!


TY Equus! :heart:


GreenEyes48's photo
Sun 11/11/12 06:37 AM


Is this the fundamental reason why some men like to chase and women enjoy playing hard to get in return? Seems to be a lot of the reason a man feels he has to work hard to get "the prize." Whatever happened to passion in relationships anymore? Has this drained out because women stopped being "women" or rather "self sufficient" and can make their own decisions, their own money, have a choice in a guy? I was thinking this could explain a lot of what is really going with broken relationships lately. Today's woman is very different from what she was in the 20s on to about the late 60s. Seems like it could be a factor in the demise in a lot of relationships.

Guys, are you bothered by a feminist?

Your reasoning is faulty. "The prize" just may not be worth as much as you value it. A strong, independent woman is truly a prize. A domineering controlling ***** is not. Seek balance including between men and women and there will be no need for labels.
I agree...I don't call myself a feminist. I don't like labels either. (Because I don't want to be "boxed-in" or limited or restricted or defined as being one way or another!)..Nobody likes bossy or pushy or "bratty" people who insist on having their "own way" all the time. This applies to both men and women!

GreenEyes48's photo
Sun 11/11/12 06:37 AM
Edited by GreenEyes48 on Sun 11/11/12 07:04 AM
Made a double post by mistake...So I'll add something else. I grew up as an only child so I don't know what it feels like to have brothers or sisters..But I do think there is a lot of separation and segregation between boys and girls in school (and just in general) when we're growing up...When boys hear their coaches call them "girls" or "sissies" on sports teams this doesn't help! The implication is that girls are stupid and dumb or weaklings etc. So no boy wants to be called a "girl!"...It all starts off when we're small. And too often it carries on into adulthood....Boys and girls need to be taught to relate to each other as "people." And encouraged to show respect for the opposite sex at a young age. Don't you think?

GreenEyes48's photo
Sun 11/11/12 06:46 AM

Much confusion on what feminism is...as stated in previous posts.

As long as people find humor in rape jokes...feminism is needed.
As long as girls and women are abused and mutilated ALL over the world, feminism is needed.
As long as little girls think " him pulling my hair means he likes me"...feminism is needed.

Man hating is about that..hating men.
Feminism has nothing to do with hating and or not needing men.
Great post and points!...I remember getting teased and tormented by a few boys when I was in grade school...These boys didn't know how to relate to girls in normal or positive ways...They thought they had to be a "brat" to get attention I guess...But there were a few boys in my classes who treated girls as "friends" and equals and this was nice.

indianadave4's photo
Sun 11/11/12 05:53 PM
Edited by indianadave4 on Sun 11/11/12 05:53 PM
...

MariahsFantasy's photo
Sun 11/25/12 05:49 PM

Much confusion on what feminism is...as stated in previous posts.

As long as people find humor in rape jokes...feminism is needed.
As long as girls and women are abused and mutilated ALL over the world, feminism is needed.
As long as little girls think " him pulling my hair means he likes me"...feminism is needed.

Man hating is about that..hating men.
Feminism has nothing to do with hating and or not needing men.


How could I miss this? It's right on the nail. bigsmile

indianadave4's photo
Wed 11/28/12 04:29 PM
But men are learning that we need them, not as our daddies but as good, hard working, respect inspiring, fellow companies on this trip through life.


Never state the phrase "But men are learning that we need them, not as our daddies but as good, hard working, respect inspiring, fellow companies on this trip through life" within earshot of a real feminist. You would be seriously persecuted and ridiculed for such "female heresy".

no photo
Fri 11/30/12 10:24 AM

Is this the fundamental reason why some men like to chase and women enjoy playing hard to get in return? Seems to be a lot of the reason a man feels he has to work hard to get "the prize." Whatever happened to passion in relationships anymore? Has this drained out because women stopped being "women" or rather "self sufficient" and can make their own decisions, their own money, have a choice in a guy? I was thinking this could explain a lot of what is really going with broken relationships lately. Today's woman is very different from what she was in the 20s on to about the late 60s. Seems like it could be a factor in the demise in a lot of relationships.

Guys, are you bothered by a feminist?


Not at all!
Women (and men) seem to think that they only get to gain in a relationship. Collective bargaining is not only gaining more than what you have today. You can also loose. If you fail to give 100%, money, body, sex, effort, fun, tears, pains, et.al. then you will never enjoy the true nature of what a relationship can be. Hold back anything and there will be diminishment. This goes for both parties in a relationship. Being a feminist or a machoist is a personality trait. In order to receive you can not be giving, and in order to give you can not be receiving. Give all and let your partner choose what they want to receive.

And todays woman is different. A lot more selfish, and so are men.

no photo
Sun 12/02/12 09:24 AM


Is this the fundamental reason why some men like to chase and women enjoy playing hard to get in return? Seems to be a lot of the reason a man feels he has to work hard to get "the prize." Whatever happened to passion in relationships anymore? Has this drained out because women stopped being "women" or rather "self sufficient" and can make their own decisions, their own money, have a choice in a guy? I was thinking this could explain a lot of what is really going with broken relationships lately. Today's woman is very different from what she was in the 20s on to about the late 60s. Seems like it could be a factor in the demise in a lot of relationships.

Guys, are you bothered by a feminist?


Not at all!
Women (and men) seem to think that they only get to gain in a relationship. Collective bargaining is not only gaining more than what you have today. You can also loose. If you fail to give 100%, money, body, sex, effort, fun, tears, pains, et.al. then you will never enjoy the true nature of what a relationship can be. Hold back anything and there will be diminishment. This goes for both parties in a relationship. Being a feminist or a machoist is a personality trait. In order to receive you can not be giving, and in order to give you can not be receiving. Give all and let your partner choose what they want to receive.

And todays woman is different. A lot more selfish, and so are men.


well I would agree that selfishness in general is more acceptable today....I think some of that has to do more with recent generations being born into an instant gratification world rather than feminism

I think women becoming financially independent may appear as selfishness because we do not want to take on extra duties outside of work, but rather want those duties divided equally. Even FT home makers are more aware these days of the financial worth of their labours. I still think that once you meet the right person though, love you feel as a man or a woman will compel you to want to do for the other. It is when reciprocation is lacking that problems start.

Also the prevalence of divorce I think has made men (mostly) appear selfish because many take large financial losses in divorce so subsequently cop and attitude of "mine" toward their money and it seems like all they care about. This is a huge turn off to women who don't understand that experience where the man is not really selfish but the current legal environment has taught him to be very protective of his belongings to survive

me? I am bothered by both, originally not at all selfish I am now incredibly so...I took monumental losses in divorce and will prolly never marry again. Divorce has drastically affected my standard of living with little justice. AND I was married to someone who took me for granted - we took each other for granted so I am very wary of that now ....I learned not to do that - but am overly paranoid of being taken for granted...alas....it makes it hard to trust a man's motives - even when they are genuine.

but I see these things as not necessarily related to feminisim per se

Ray1010's photo
Sun 12/02/12 10:03 AM
Believe Her! The Woman Never Lies Myth...

http://www.ipt-forensics.com/journal/volume6/j6_2_4.htm

note to feminists- you want the truth...you cant handle the truth,
quite simply feminism has got legal process by the short n curlies, but they are on to you. This is probably why a lot of educated males tend to take their time these days, falling in love with the right woman isnt as simple as it once was, blame feminism !:banana:


Hikerjohn's photo
Wed 12/12/12 10:33 PM
Edited by Hikerjohn on Wed 12/12/12 10:35 PM
Anytime you try to make something not true, true, there is chaos.

The goal for equality between two non equal entities will never be true.

Believing its true still wont make it true.

Believing a lie only makes you a fool, doesn't make the lie a truth.

A bolt will never be a nut. And a nut will never be a bolt. Sorry Chaz. But they function quite well together. Each will always have its purpose.

But what damage has been caused for both sides of this equation in this useless goal of making a nut equal to the bolt.

And for the record, there are strengths and powers a nut has that a bolt never will. It doesn't make one more important than the other. Just different.

so all you nuts out there who which to be equal to a bolt, find peace and embrace being a nut.

And keep in mind. a healthy strong bolt doesn't want a nut that doesn't want to be a nut.

msharmony's photo
Wed 12/12/12 10:42 PM

Anytime you try to make something not true, true, there is chaos.

The goal for equality between two non equal entities will never be true.

Believing its true still wont make it true.

Believing a lie only makes you a fool, doesn't make the lie a truth.

A bolt will never be a nut. And a nut will never be a bolt. Sorry Chaz. But they function quite well together. Each will always have its purpose.

But what damage has been caused for both sides of this equation in this useless goal of making a nut equal to the bolt.

And for the record, there are strengths and powers a nut has that a bolt never will. It doesn't make one more important than the other. Just different.

so all you nuts out there who which to be equal to a bolt, find peace and embrace being a nut.

And keep in mind. a healthy strong bolt doesn't want a nut that doesn't want to be a nut.


laugh laugh

now thats a funny analogy, even though there arent really solid strenths and powers that are as set in stone as those of tools and nuts and bolts

I dont know there is anything one gender can do that another can 'never' do

besides impregnate (only men have the equipment) and give birth (only women have the equipment)


but I do get your jist, ,I never thought men and women should see each other as 'equal' either

equally important,, yes, but the same ,,, no
dont know why women ever wanted to be the same instead of pushing for acceptance and appreciation of the way they already were,,,