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| Topic: have fallen for a married man | |
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Wasn't looking for it, did not want to, not sure how it slipped up on me. The sad truth is I have fallen for someone that belongs to someone else. I don't want to break up his family. I do still want to spend as much time with him as possible. I know this has no happy ending just wish i knew how to let go. I try and date others but he is the only one that captures my attention. I am so confused.
I know you people here will not hold back on your opinions and looking forward to hearing what you have to say. Is it possible to have a happy ending when in love with a married man that you want him to stay with his wife but still want him as a lover, friend etc.... |
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Wasn't looking for it, did not want to, not sure how it slipped up on me. The sad truth is I have fallen for someone that belongs to someone else. I don't want to break up his family. I do still want to spend as much time with him as possible. I know this has no happy ending just wish i knew how to let go. I try and date others but he is the only one that captures my attention. I am so confused. I know you people here will not hold back on your opinions and looking forward to hearing what you have to say. Is it possible to have a happy ending when in love with a married man that you want him to stay with his wife but still want him as a lover, friend etc.... The only way it would be a happy ending is either the family doesn't care you are involved with him or they are swingers. Otherwise someone is bound to leave with a broken heart. |
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Maybe you need to set your standards a little higher. The married man is obviously someone with little character.
Sorry to be so blunt but maybe you deserve better. Good luck to you. |
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&& If he's cheating on his wife what do you think will happen if he ever got together with you?
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You need to search your heart and do the honorable thing.
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&& If he's cheating on his wife what do you think will happen if he ever got together with you? i agree with her! you are wanting something that isnt realistic. |
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Slipped up on you?....you mean like a nieces birthday, or a thief in the night?
Why is it that whenever people do things they know are wrong, this becomes a viable defense? You are a grown-up and you knew very well what was going on and still, you chose to allow it, own it and call it what it is. Do not lie to us or yourself. There comes a point when even in the midst of the bright and shiny, one makes a choice. There is always that one moment when we say to our selves yes, or no. Do you remember it? ……..Does he? Do you think his family will search for it? That moment. How about his wife? Will she wonder what it was like that instant he decided to forgo their life together? I bet she will and I bet she asks him to…I wonder how it is going to sound “I don’t know, it just slipped up on me,” I’m sure that will be quite comforting to her. |
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Edited by
Kings_Knight
on
Wed 08/18/10 10:41 AM
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Gee. My ex did the same thing.
That's why she's my EX ... Oddly enough, she, too, got her feelings hurt when he began cheating on HER ... It ain't rocket science - HE was cheating on HIS wife with HER and she was cheating on ME with HIM - but she expected HIM to be 'faithful' to HER ... ? Effing unreal ... Key word: MARRIED ... Wanna play? Key word: DIVORCED ... |
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Edited by
earthytaurus76
on
Wed 08/18/10 10:59 AM
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You can stay happy if you know how to play the game, cash in the benefits, and dont expect much.
Date others, and keep your options open... hes the desperate one.. not you. Ps... Lemme guess he told you 4 months into it that he was attached? I dont know why but 4 always seems to be the magic number. Ps happy ending? Probably not. |
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Wasn't looking for it, did not want to, not sure how it slipped up on me. The sad truth is I have fallen for someone that belongs to someone else. I don't want to break up his family. I do still want to spend as much time with him as possible. I know this has no happy ending just wish i knew how to let go. I try and date others but he is the only one that captures my attention. I am so confused. I know you people here will not hold back on your opinions and looking forward to hearing what you have to say. Is it possible to have a happy ending when in love with a married man that you want him to stay with his wife but still want him as a lover, friend etc.... What you do and how you feel about it is for you alone to truly know......I have never entertained the notion it was ever okay to even consider falling in love with a married man for myself......I, also, do think that falling in love is an easy thing with anyone that treats me right, if you allow yourself to do so.......and getting over love is easy for me too, if they do not treat me right.....I know where the door is and I don't need an exit sign in that case......and a married man allowing another woman besides his wife to love him, wow, I hurt for his wife and what she may or may not know..... 
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"It just happened"..I HATE that phrase..it was made up by people who don't wanna take responsibility for the wrongs they've done..NOTHING just happens..It's like when men pop up and say "I didn't mean to sleep with Lucy..It just happened"..THAT don't fly either..you decide who you fall for..you decide who you sleep with..If you know a person is already taken then you do not open your heart to him/her..if you can't spend time with a person without falling in love with them then you DON'T spend time with married men..cut ties with him..if he keeps calling,change your number..if he comes over..DON'T open the door..it's your door..you decide who gets in!
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"It just happened"..I HATE that phrase..it was made up by people who don't wanna take responsibility for the wrongs they've done..NOTHING just happens..It's like when men pop up and say "I didn't mean to sleep with Lucy..It just happened"..THAT don't fly either..you decide who you fall for..you decide who you sleep with..If you know a person is already taken then you do not open your heart to him/her..if you can't spend time with a person without falling in love with them then you DON'T spend time with married men..cut ties with him..if he keeps calling,change your number..if he comes over..DON'T open the door..it's your door..you decide who gets in! Right on, right on ... good on ya ... ! |
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Umm, Bad idea!
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Wasn't looking for it, did not want to, not sure how it slipped up on me. The sad truth is I have fallen for someone that belongs to someone else. I don't want to break up his family. I do still want to spend as much time with him as possible. I know this has no happy ending just wish i knew how to let go. I try and date others but he is the only one that captures my attention. I am so confused. I know you people here will not hold back on your opinions and looking forward to hearing what you have to say. Is it possible to have a happy ending when in love with a married man that you want him to stay with his wife but still want him as a lover, friend etc.... What you do and how you feel about it is for you alone to truly know......I have never entertained the notion it was ever okay to even consider falling in love with a married man for myself......I, also, do think that falling in love is an easy thing with anyone that treats me right, if you allow yourself to do so.......and getting over love is easy for me too, if they do not treat me right.....I know where the door is and I don't need an exit sign in that case......and a married man allowing another woman besides his wife to love him, wow, I hurt for his wife and what she may or may not know..... Bingo! Y' hit the nail on the head ... |
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My ex husband cheated on me three times that I know of during our marriage. He moved his girlfriend into our home 4 months after I left. His cheating nearly destroyed me and it definitely destroyed our family. My daughters ask me all the time (even though its been 3 years) why their mommy and daddy can't be together. They don't understand.
Um not going to tell you what you should do. You already know. Cheating is wrong. For any reason. Don't be selfish. Walk away before more people get hurt and lives are destroyed. |
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My ex husband cheated on me three times that I know of during our marriage. He moved his girlfriend into our home 4 months after I left. His cheating nearly destroyed me and it definitely destroyed our family. My daughters ask me all the time (even though its been 3 years) why their mommy and daddy can't be together. They don't understand. Um not going to tell you what you should do. You already know. Cheating is wrong. For any reason. Don't be selfish. Walk away before more people get hurt and lives are destroyed. 
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You may have a point but I have been dating for a year or so and have not had anyone take a hold of my heart like this one. I really think it is because believe it or not he really is a nice guy. I know he feels guilt too but I am not sure if I feel what he is doing is so wrong. If he stays with her what is the harm in him seeking something missing with her. I know that he has tried to get her to see things his way but she is not meeting his needs. That being said he loves her I know and for what ever reason that doesn't bother me. I know i should set the bar a little higher but i have dated and men and continue to keep options open but no one makes me feel like he does. All the other men I have dated just seem to bore me or no spark. I may be settling but it doesn't feel that way all the time.
I am having a hard time letting go. He is the closest thing i have found to what i would like to find in a my next partner. The cheating thing doesnt bother me. I know it happens and i know it doesn't mean you care for anyone any less it is just something that can make you feel good again if kids etc take over at home. |
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You may have a point but I have been dating for a year or so and have not had anyone take a hold of my heart like this one. I really think it is because believe it or not he really is a nice guy. I know he feels guilt too but I am not sure if I feel what he is doing is so wrong. If he stays with her what is the harm in him seeking something missing with her. I know that he has tried to get her to see things his way but she is not meeting his needs. That being said he loves her I know and for what ever reason that doesn't bother me. I know i should set the bar a little higher but i have dated and men and continue to keep options open but no one makes me feel like he does. All the other men I have dated just seem to bore me or no spark. I may be settling but it doesn't feel that way all the time. I am having a hard time letting go. He is the closest thing i have found to what i would like to find in a my next partner. The cheating thing doesnt bother me. I know it happens and i know it doesn't mean you care for anyone any less it is just something that can make you feel good again if kids etc take over at home. Have you ever been cheated on? |
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bleh, you reap what you sow...
$.02 
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yes i have and at the time it really hurt. It was that feeling of is every thing a lie.. I am not saying i don't feel bad for her. I would hope she never has to find out really. I don't want to break up there family I really don't. I wish there was a way to back up. I know what I have to do but it is so freaking hard. I wish I didn't care for him so much is all. If i had ever met her i know i could have never allowed this to happen.
Oh one more thing that really makes this a dead end street i am 10yrs older than he is. Yep i know I am set for a heartache just need a kick in the *** i guess to get on with it. Easier to be with him and happy at the moment. I hate this i really do for many reasons but still i am here in this stupid mess. How to walk away??????? Please tell me how?? |
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