Dated an alcoholic and drained me of everything. I would be worried someone would fall off the wagon and put me through hell again

Short answer.... hell no!

I work in substance abuse. I know a lot of great people in recovery, but it is highly unlikely I would get in a relationship with someone. Even if they have significant sobriety those behaviors take even more time to change.

In treatment, we steer clients to wait as long as possible to get into a relationship... at least 1 year clean time.

My husband was an alcoholic the last ten years were hell especially when they fall off over & over again. If given the choice I couldn't do either been there done that I don't think I have the strength to go there again

What behaviours.? Do you mean mindsets? Thank you for replying.

Exactly... I did hard drugs in my early twenties I was an addict.
Once an addict always an addict.
I am just a clean one and have been for over 30 years.

Me personally there are too many factors in this equations. I try very hard
not to make hard and fast rules. Since there is always an exception.
They would have to be clean everything else case by case

Hugs

That is awesome!

Thank you ladies... I figure it we are out here may as well keep it honest.

Having done the relationship thing with an active alcoholic, all I gots to say, is that it was a trip to Hell in a
bucket, that i never want to repeat.

Clean/recovering? Yeah, I might give a chance to.

I wish nothing but the best and love for those in recovery. But after pure hell guess I'm gun shy

That being said, I'm going to quote something, from one of the finest human beings I've ever been lucky enough to call my friend. He was an old timer. He had gotten sober back when Jesus was still in diapers.
"Alcoholics aren't bad people. We're just f'ing nuts".

I wish I had enough confidence to get into something with a non drinking alcoholic or ex drug addict but I just don't have the confidence with people who in general have "addictive" personalities.

I would pass. I will say it could be situational. If that man was long term recovered and a health and fitness guy I might give him consideration. I just hate drama and too many people with addictive personalities seem to have drama follow them around like a black cloud.I don't do drama.

I would get into a relationship with a heroine using prostitute,
if she had gotten clean, sober, and had turned her life around 360�.
Because I can pretty much guarantee, she would have learned more
life lessons than most people.

I so agree... with this
What one does when they are young should have no bearing on one
as they get older if they learn from their mistakes.
I know for a fact I would never use again. Have I been tempted absolutely
knowing the hell I went through getting clean..keeps me clean

It also depends how much you love him and how hot he is.

There's no such thing. Once an addict, always an addict.

"It's alcoholISM, not alcohoWASM.

wow i know a gal did pain meds for years, from her doc, shes been sober for 21 years, she went thru alot to detox, help her thru it, she came out strong,as ever,,so there your wrong, not always the case,,