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Topic: how hard are you!
no1phD's photo
Sat 05/30/15 11:06 AM
On yourself..:wink: when you make a mistake....or do something you know you should.not have..... maybe a mistake at work.. are something in your personal life?.. for instance.. you're on a diet... and you finally give in to your craving and have that bowl of ice cream..... or perhaps you have quit smoking and had a cigarette.....


..... maybe you promised yourself never to get.. fall down drunk again..

.... and then you go out with friends and... well ..get fall down drunk again.....lol.... how hard do you kick yourself in the butt.. for such a indiscretion.....

. personally I .. M. much harder on myself than anyone else.. could ever be..ohwell . sometimes it takes me days.. to forgive myself.... I have to analyze why.. did I slip up again... how did I let this happen.... what must I do to keep it from happening again..?..

... oh sure eventually.. I get over myself lol.. forgive myself. brush myself off and get back up on the horse... again so to speak....... I am my own worst critic and nightmare..lol


.sooo... how hard are you on yourself..hmm....

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no photo
Sat 05/30/15 11:09 AM
ohwell flowerforyou

no photo
Sat 05/30/15 11:18 AM
I have a tendency to kick myself in the arse quite a bit. Helps when you actually can kick yourself in the arse literally, with both legs even better. :thumbsup:

No actually I am my own worst critic....I can take what others have said and exponentially take it to extremes. I've always been very critical of myself, and sometimes don't know why. Probably because so many times I feel a deep seeded hatred for myself. oops

no photo
Sat 05/30/15 11:31 AM
I am very hard... on myself. I can't stand it when I mess up. I need to make things right straight away. I fix the damage immediately because I detest living with mistakes. So being hard... on myself works out quite pleasantly.

no photo
Sat 05/30/15 11:55 AM
Edited by unknown_romeo on Sat 05/30/15 11:55 AM



I'm quite hard on myself...especially after a few slipups in the past...taught me a lot...no messing around for me at the moment drinks

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Argo's photo
Sat 05/30/15 12:17 PM
i am definitely much too unyielding on myself when i feel the need to point out
some morons behavioral tendencies in certain situations....so, i've learned, in those
instances, my remarks are best left unsaid...thereby avoiding any conflict or the need to apologize to those big-mouth fools...indifferent

btw.... nice title for the topic...

no1phD's photo
Sat 05/30/15 12:18 PM
well it got your attention didn't it..lmao

no photo
Sat 05/30/15 02:00 PM
how hard are you! On yourself..when you make a mistake.

As compared to what?
I'm harder on myself than some.
Less than others.

I don't cut off fingers from shame.
But I don't feel nothing.

personally I .. M. much harder on myself than anyone else.. could ever be

IMO the interesting part of the whole "hard on yourself" thing is in many ways it's just trained behavior instilled in you by your parents.
Just like pavolovs dog. That continues all your life.
Childish behavior perpetuated into adulthood.

Parents punished you for what they told you were mistakes.
So now when you do what you perceive are mistakes, you punish yourself...because you expect to be punished anyway.

You create your own reality of how things "should" be.
Round shapes in round holes, left shoe on left foot, boys get trucks girls get dolls, hot burner means burned hand, crime means punishment.

And sometimes people punish themselves overly hard (emotionally, sometimes even physically) because they think (on some level) their parents will love them more, they are doing to themselves what their parents did, so are fulfilling the whole group rules thing.

Sometimes people punish themselves overly hard because their parents were hard on them and that's how they feel loved and normal.

Or their parents weren't around but they want to seem normal and like everyone else, so they adopt what they think they should be experiencing in order to be normal.

Sometimes people punish themselves overly hard just so they can feel somewhat justified in doing the next bad thing.
A mistake merits a certain punishment, go overly hard on yourself now means a little credit for next time, so next time you behave badly you don't have to feel too bad about it.

The awesome part is people don't consciously know this about themselves.
They just know the emotions involved. Of being hard on themselves, or wallowing in emotional pain for doing something wrong.
I love that.

no1phD's photo
Sat 05/30/15 03:24 PM
Awww ^^^..sounds like someone needs a huglaugh :angel:

no photo
Sat 05/30/15 07:21 PM
I'm not supposed to talk to you right now because I'm still in timeout for something I did when I was 14.

I can forgive everyone else, no matter how horrible the crime because I write it off as "Their just human and humans are messed up like that." But when it comes to me there are things that I did over twenty years ago that I still have not forgiven myself for.

no photo
Sat 05/30/15 07:30 PM
Yes.. I've learned with age that ....to thine own self be true...it helps me to move on & not get that bewildered effect that just stagnates that un-responsive behavior. Those spoil your confidence & regression just isn't in my vocabulary. Life is just too short & we just don't realize how good we it at any point in time. So, people just push forward you can't go too wrong.. Attitude is everything! As long as you have your health just give thanks & be helpful but, mostly enjoy the present time.

bashajones's photo
Sat 05/30/15 07:30 PM
I learned to let go of regrets a long time ago. I'm gonna make my decisions, and own them...good or bad.

I guess I'm easy on myself....happy

jacktrades's photo
Sun 05/31/15 12:01 AM
I am very hard on myself and I had to learn that I am not perfect and to let things go. It is still a work in progress for myself.

Annierooroo's photo
Sun 05/31/15 01:48 AM
I was very hard on myself. I would feel guilty and couldn't live with myself.
I had to put right my wrong, even then I would still feel bad for days.
I have learnt too not be hard and remember I am not perfect and I will make mistakes.

tta1128's photo
Sun 05/31/15 04:44 AM
In my personal life, I'm not that hard on myself anymore. Live, learn and move on is my motto. At work, I hate making mistakes or causing an issue. Whatever can be done to remedy is done asap. No sense dwelling on something so there's no procrastinating.

no photo
Sun 05/31/15 05:12 AM
Edited by WonderWoman48 on Sun 05/31/15 05:28 AM
We probably all do this at one time or another, but if you are constantly judging yourself for not being perfect, it may be time to take a good look at your internal self talk and make a different choice.
Some people always judge themselves harshly, while others are more tolerant of their own faults.
If your inner voice can criticize you then it motivate you too. Use your inner voice to build you up not put you down.

Nobody is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes.
We need to learn from our mistakes. We should regret our mistakes so that we do not run the risk of repeating them, but never carry them forward into the future with us.

TMommy's photo
Sun 05/31/15 07:40 AM
Edited by TMommy on Sun 05/31/15 07:45 AM
I hold incredibly high standards for myself and for ones I care about. I am driven,competitive,moralistic and a perfectionist. I believe in doing very best I can in all situations
I do not acccept weakness within myself that is luxury afforded to. others. though I understand I am human being and fallible and at times I lose my cool and get stressed out. I still get up next day and do what needs doing. Years of practice being mom machine. Does this make me hard *** now..yes in lot of ways I suppose it does

bashajones's photo
Sun 05/31/15 11:17 PM

no photo
Sat 06/20/15 07:14 AM
I get really angry with myself. Sometimes I'll end up drinking half a bottle of alcohol. Not on purpose. It's just that after around the second glass, I'll not realize how much I've drank. I've made such a heartbreaking decision, so having "the odd glass" of alcohol, quietens the chaos in my mind. I bet I look like I've taken an antihistamine. I sure feel like I have. I'm so calm right now. laugh

dcastelmissy's photo
Sat 06/20/15 08:00 AM
I'm my own worst critic ! ohwell

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