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Topic: A complicated question?
roger77swe's photo
Tue 10/09/18 10:43 AM
Hello everyone! I have an interesting question for you.
Let's say you are searching around and you suddenly find someone who interests you from a country rather far away, for example if you live in Sweden and the one you are finding to be interesting is living in a country like for example Sudan.
Now here comes the complicated part. What if you, who were searching have low vision?
i would be interested to know how you guys think about things like that, if someone has a disability. so in other words, would you mind if someone who's interested in you has a disability like low vision?

Easttowest72's photo
Tue 10/09/18 10:56 AM
Be careful of scammers especially from other countries.

I think it depends on the person. A guy I went to school with is trying to talk to me. He is partly disabled because of an accident. It limits his finances and ability to do things. Not sure if I'm ready to be tied to that.

Stu's photo
Tue 10/09/18 11:01 AM
If low vision is your only problem, consider yourself lucky.

That's all I got to say about that.

no photo
Tue 10/09/18 11:10 AM
maybe

I_love_bluegrass's photo
Tue 10/09/18 11:19 AM
Edited by I_love_bluegrass on Tue 10/09/18 11:45 AM
Several thousand miles away...*and* disabled?
That'd be a no...mainly on the distance part.
Unless they have the money to fly here to see me all the time, because I do not fly, and, even if I did...I am not interested in spending thousands of dollars to visit someone enough to see if there is a relationship.

The disabilty part is less problematic..
I just want them to be able to do what *I* do physically....and I am no athlete/ exceptionally fit...but, I have land that needs maintained, and *I* do it all myself and have since I've been a widow, but wouldn't want someone who couldn't ever help out with chores...or who didn't enjoy the occasional long stroll through the woods...

Datwasntme's photo
Tue 10/09/18 11:31 AM
it's all mind over matter , i have no mind so it don't matter
wait
that wasn't it , all though true

oh yeah,
its not a disability
it's a challenge

i was not the one to coin that , came from a friend of mine that cant move from the nipples down .... he was all ways in a positive attitude

its not a disability
it's a challenge : )

the heart wants what the heart wants
<shrug>


and like Easttowest72 said be very carefull



SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Tue 10/09/18 11:56 AM
First of all I too want to say to be careful and not fall for a scammer. In order to get to love you have to meet and when someone is in another country this is not possible, meaning love cannot blossom, just the illusion of it.
Also people from a poor country are often looking for someone in a first world country so they can have a better life. Love is not part of this, it is greed.
People with a disability have more problems in finding love, meaning they are a very vulnerable group, especially when it comes to being taken advantage of by scammers a.k.a. people in a poor country that are looking for a way out.

As for your question, it would be a deal-breaker for me. It means limitations that simply don't work with my life and what I want and need in order to be happy.

Anywho, be careful. People on disability often have quite a good income, and one that is guaranteed for life, meaning you are a very interesting party for scammers. Just suggest that you cannot pay for their cost of living. You'll see how much they care about you then. I don't want to be a spoil-sport, but they'll likely disappear overnight to find another victim.

Good luck
flowerforyou

Toodygirl5's photo
Tue 10/09/18 12:05 PM
I think some people have a problem excepting a partner with a Disability.

Some people have Preferences, even with people who don't have any Disability.

I t just depends on the people involved. And if you're in love.

I wouldn't be interested in any Man living outside USA. But that's just me.




mzrosie's photo
Tue 10/09/18 12:18 PM
Hello roger77swe

I would suggest for you to avoid long distance relationship specially from far away lands. Stay local or within your country.

There are lots of unscrupulous people out there ready to pounce on innocent victims. Don't share your personal information and never ever send money to anyone no matter how sad or desperate their story is.

If low vision is your only disability, I think you are better off than most of us here, specially those who are who are mentally and emotionally challenged like a handful of regular forum posters. laugh jk love you guys :heart:

I wish you the best of luck
happy waving

Tom4Uhere's photo
Tue 10/09/18 12:29 PM
Isolation is a factor in "other country" relationships.
In the USA, we have Canada and Mexico which are quite large.
A relationship on the same land mass but in central or south America requires quite a cost for the regular travel needed to establish a bond with someone.

In Europe, foreign country travel is much simpler. The Sudan is still a complicated destination from Sweden tho.
I have been on other dating sites that warn against certain countries because they have a higher ratio of scammers and Africa is one such country.
I'd be really careful before committing to a relationship with someone from Africa, especially from East Africa. Plus, there is a lot of unrest in that region which might make you a target of hate.

Its tough finding someone when you have a disability. You can really get desperate if you haven't found your inner peace with it yet.
I recommend you heed the wisdom of the other respondents about being wary of scammers. The scammers can be very convincing if you are desperate from loneliness.

no photo
Tue 10/09/18 01:44 PM

Hello roger77swe

I would suggest for you to avoid long distance relationship specially from far away lands. Stay local or within your country.

There are lots of unscrupulous people out there ready to pounce on innocent victims. Don't share your personal information and never ever send money to anyone no matter how sad or desperate their story is.

If low vision is your only disability, I think you are better off than most of us here, specially those who are who are mentally and emotionally challenged like a handful of regular forum posters. laugh jk love you guys :heart:

I wish you the best of luck
happy waving


I agreed with this

Rock's photo
Tue 10/09/18 01:58 PM
Be careful.


no photo
Tue 10/09/18 02:47 PM
Two points were brought up here. I'm only speaking for myself, but I'm not looking for someone from another country to be in a relationship with. Secondly, it may depend on the disability a person has. I know that I'd want a guy that I had confidence in and know that he could protect me, if something unexpected were to happen.

no photo
Tue 10/09/18 03:10 PM
my "maybe" answer was just about disability.

"No" to the distance

pumpilicious 💕's photo
Tue 10/09/18 03:55 PM
Yes to distance if they can afford to fly me there often and see if we are able to live together.

Disability would be harder for me, depends on the situation.

oldkid46's photo
Tue 10/09/18 06:21 PM
The disability would depend on how they fit into my lifestyle and what I might have to give up. Some things are insignificant while others would be a deal breaker.

I have often contemplated trying to get involved with a woman from a different (perhaps 3rd world) country but have not pursued it because of immigration rules. Women from some other places in the world are much more accepting of older men and the stability they offer. European women have a much more positive attitude about sex than American women.

no photo
Tue 10/09/18 08:21 PM
I don't understand how distance relates to disability. That's 2 separate questions and topics lumped into 1. Plus there's various kinds of disability's.

FeelYoung's photo
Tue 10/09/18 09:56 PM
have you ever watched the TV show 90 Day Fiance' ??
I watch SOMETIMES and it seems the biggest problem is distance and a different culture. Sometimes they can't even visit, they each speak their own language into a cell phone and it translates to the other person. The cost of travel to meet someone in a far away land can be very hard on your finances. Then there's the foreign family to deal with, watched one where the American had to give 5 or 6 Water Buffalo and thousands of dollars as a dowry. Then he was out of money and at that point, the girl didn't want him anymore. Perhaps low vision would not seem disturbing to a new friend, but deep down in COULD be and if not honest, they could with-hold that info til you are in so deep its hard to get out --My opinion is try to meet someone in your own state/province and at least in your own country.

roger77swe's photo
Tue 10/09/18 10:03 PM
oh i see, well, as for his disability, i think what's good to keep in mind is, if it creates difficulties as far as a relationship goes, the most common cause is its the environment that creates the dificulties and not the person itself. As for me, if my braille display should shut down right now i would have no idea what i'm writing or if my white cate is ran over by a bike and it snaps in half, i wouldn't find my way to work safely. As for scams, yes i'm quite aware of those things.

Tom4Uhere's photo
Tue 10/09/18 10:54 PM
Sighted disabilities are pretty severe compared to 'other' disabilities.
Could I form a relationship with a blind woman?
Perhaps.
I know that it would be an added responsibility for me to make sure she is safe and feels secure in strange environments.
But see, I'm not a physical, appearances type of person.
There's nothing wrong with those that are, I'm just not that way.

There is also a difference in disability and handicapped.
At least here in the states it is.
I am disabled because my doctor will not sign off on my ability to work.
I'm not really handicapped as in not able to function physically.

Blindness or loss of vision is an extreme handicap.
There are different levels of disability for blindness.
If someone has never had sight, its different from someone that had sight and no longer does.
Its also different for someone that is slowly losing their sight.
Each situation has different circumstances that require different commitments from their partner.

The LDR is not the real issue here.
The disability is.
If the handicap of blindness were not in the scenario, would an LDR be the option?
Is the disability driving the LDR potential?

Chances are, a person that is born with vision problems has already come to grips with their handicap. They already know by your age what needs to happen to find someone locally.
However, if the blindness is a condition that 'happened' and you haven't come to grips with your condition fully, an LDR might be appealing because its easier.

I reiterate to find your own contentment with your condition first.
While, accepting it, adjusting to it you have to find the contentment that makes you 'feel' comfortable around those you seek for an intimate relationship.
When that happens, you might find that an LDR is not needed.
So, basically, its a two-fold remedy.
Get comfortable with your condition and those around you's reactions to your condition.
Seek locally someone that can accept your condition and commitment requirement.

I have me blind people, at first meet, I couldn't tell were blind because they 'carried' their handicap well. Only after 'getting to know' them better did I find out they were handicapped.

"Woe Is Me" is not a good way to start a relationship.
It may seem appealing to play the disability card to get someone to consider you but in reality, that is a lie. Any relationship based on a lie is bound to fail.

You basically, need to present yourself honestly and have your own contentment. Finding someone to accept you at 'face value' is difficult even without a disability.
If you find your own inner contentment the search is much easier because your inner peace and joy are not hinging on how others accept you. It is who you are, inside that others find appealing.

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