Will put them on the top of the God Bless list. Sorry to hear you have to cope with this. Farming accidents can really be scarey but seems like it really brings the best out of the community and I have seen miraculous things happen. Hope your miracle is swift.

Seems like the bugs always come into the system on the holiday's. Oh well. Wish I could talk to a grownup.

Thanks for carrying enough to help her resolve this challenge. While it is good that you are onboard understanding the need as an adult she needs to take the lead in solving this health condition for herself if she can.

Someone who is depressed enough to be on medication in the first place has been told the importance of maintaining the prescription and I have never known a physician to not provide a patient a list of legal resources to do that.

All states have metal health services funded by federal funds through their county where she can recieve assistance in getting ongoing care and medications.

Some people will refuse to participate in these programs because of the stigma which is very sad because Depression is very common and hightly treatable for people who want to.

Other's sometimes try to plead poverty to their people thinking the sympathy and or attention will somehow make them feel better. Or just pay for the medication as some proof they love them. The dangerous part in that thinking is you can usually bever do enough to prove to a depressed person that you love them.

Look up the the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill for a list of local resources.

There is also a federal program where your senator or congressman can help you get a year of her medication funded. It won't be an immediate solution because the paper work takes some time but it should be enough to get her on the right track.

I would recommend a a trip to a library and do some reading about depression if you are seriously considering a relationship with someone who copes with this often chronic condition.

LOL At my age as long as I can lick and icecream cone I am happy.

I would say from experience on both sides of the spectrum just try to make each day as normal as possible, enjoy being a parent and forget the "foster" part. Remembering that you have a person you are trying to give their own place in this world not be a hero, not make up for their parents failures (believe me that is impossible), saving the world, or making up for something you think you need to make up for it will probably be worth all the hard work. It will help if you realize that you are going to make mistakes just try not to think that you have control over all the variables because you don't. One thing I found being a foster parent is you have very little control over many things. Just honesty with your foster child will help them the most because that has been in really short supply in most of their lives. Keeping in mind that being honest is not permission for being cruel.

If participateing in the foundation will help you learn to cope with your greif and give you a way to memorialize the daughter that you have in your heart I think it might be good on a limited basis. The foundation will be around for many years so you can do a little each year and still go forward with your life as a parent to the child you have.

I am not saying at times it won't be excruciateing. Loss of a child, is the worst loss you can bear, but you can survive it and I have found with time you will realize it is a priviledge. I say that because as painful as it is by surviving you honor her by reflecting the love that all your children reflect on you if only in the blink of their short lives in this universe.

Another organization that is a great comfort for families that suffer this all to common loss is Compassionate Friends.

I tend to think a child walking in there sleep is probably just a natural part of dreaming sometimes.

But it it is consistent I would probably want to be watching for other signs or stress or neurological disruptions. A watchful parent can give invaluable information to a well qualified pediatrician.

If they seem normal and happy on all other levels I would just make accomodation for the possibility that they will sleep walk and relax and count your blessings. There are parents in the world that would be glad if their child could walk asleep or awake.

To the original question; I think both parents have a responsibility to contribute so that their child has a standard of living equal to their own and to a level that the child's basic needs for food, shelter, public education, and healthcare are met even if it impoverishes them.

Since it is not a child's fault that parents decide that the other is no longer tolerable to live with and that living seperate is a luxery they can not afford doesn't justify them not having their needs met.

If you have the misfortune to get stuck with a deadbeat as a co-parent you just have to bite the bullet and do the best you can.

The reality is it is going to be a harsh existence for most custodial parents or the non-custodial parents that do do the right thing. That pretty much means that you have no life of your own and the only treasure of your life is your child.

Sadly ultimately the child, usually in their teens and twenties, will probably fault the most responsible parent for not having the forsight to see it and control the less responsible parent but hopefully they eventually learn the reality of relationships and that none of us have a crystal ball that tells us what the future will hold.

My personal standard has been to do the best that I could do and expect that the character I model for my children will help them be the best that they can be. The one thing is when they are adults they are on there own if you do it right. If you concentrate on their education, character, and social skills and don't worry so much about them likeing you they will do alright. You just have to be there even when you really don't feel like it; such as the end of the work day when you are exhausted or when you desperately need someone of your own. (Little hint is most people will leave when they have to play second fiddle to your child so faceing the reality early that it is probably going to be a solo act and learning to deal with it is your best shot of copeing.)

I am just about as far from Florida as you can get here in Sacramento. Sorry afraid of gators. Just kidding how are things going there?

Seems like you could get a court order forceing the grandparent to produce the child for visitations and maintain a constant address so that you could find employment that would accomodate visitation.

If a non custodial mother is on public assistance and non-supporting then she may be required to be fully disabled or in a treatment or training program which you do not know about.

I don't see how the state, (which is taxpayers like me) who did not require you to create this child should have to pay you child support unless you are living below the income requirements; then you could collect.

Lucky for you being the breadwinner instead of pregnant/an full time parent usually comes with a paycheck or at least unemployment instead of welfare as and unemployment perk. Try putting labor and delivery down as a job skill. Or paying for a babysitter with no money because you need a job.

Can you send me that in and email? I want to post that in my office. I like the sign that says "Due to lack of funding the complaint department will be closed until further notice."

Maybe they are just trying to avoid an awkward moment where they have to tell you it is fine being in contact on line but I don't want to meet in person say at a Mingle gathering or unexpected meeting. It is hard to to like someone as a friend and just keep it on line. Small world and things can happen to bring you together not expected. I won a free trip and had an online friend get really mad that I didn't stop buy for a visit because I knew some of their choices.

I could care less if a person chooses to smoke or not; their health, their environment, their money.

But if they are sending me mail I will tell them they are not a match if they are a smoker. Most times I will not elaborate why. But if they ask, or whine about never meeting people who care about them, then that card goes on the table. I am sorry if it hurts their feelings but many times it is the only negative I see in a profile. I will assume a "no answer" as someone who does.

As a smoker in my teens/early 20's I understand the habit. and how difficult it is to break, but enduring several miscarriages, dental problems, and watching five family members die of smoking related cancers I didn't like my odds and have managed to stay off nicotine over the years. I am sure that would not happen if I dated and or got serious with a smoker as a companion.

Maybe smokers would rather just guess why they are being rejected?

Personally if there was one thing about me, that I could change, that would affect my odds as radically as smoking seems too I think I would want to know.

I do think people could show a little manners about it. It is a legal thing to do; at least in a few places.

I do think smokers get discriminated against in many ways they may not even realize. Work, houseing, friendships, medical care, and others.

Birds Don't nest in bare trees.

Cooking and gardening. Would love to have a private garden that could cater special events for.

I would not expect to be or agree to be exclusive with someone after one date because you can't possibly know if the person is interested or even what they are really like from one date.

However I do think it is grossly unfair to continue to accept dates with someone you have gone out with several times and decided to keep looking.

I think if you don't see someone naturally spending their date time exclusively with you that they are just not that into you and you need to move on.

I personally have never seen dateing as a competition between anyone. I do know if I thought a man was thinking of me as competeing with anyone I would drop him like a hot potatoe. If you want to be with me it has to be about likeing me for the individual I am an how I treat you not seeing yourself as a prise.

Mostly because that is the ultimate in selfishness but because it would be also clear that I would see that person as very likely to cheat whenever someone that was the flavor of the day came along.

I do think if a guy finds himself consistently falling out of his dates interests then he has to do some serious self assessment about what he brings to the dateing process and the kind of women he is dating. If he dally's around about asking for dates he shouldn't be surprised if someone else comes up with and invitation and it being accepted.

I realize dateing can be expensive but if you are into a woman you need to use your imagination and make dateing a real priority.

I want to run the Canteen or make costumes. Could never remember my lines.

Once you survive the loss of a child there are not many pains you can not endure; physically or emotionally. There does seem to be more you won't put up with and just avoid or put a stop to real fast.

Yea sure we go back to and attitude that lead to people believeing that casual sex is the be all / end all of existence. Relationships last about as long as an instant coffee and you are a disposable commodity. So children concieved grow up parentless (more or less) and don't need their parents and after the flush of youth starts fadeing husbands and wives and parents seem less necessary. That works for awhile but as chronic headonism drains your credit and sometimes your health more traditional people don't feel like cleaning up your self made mess. Life is a give and take proposition and people who only take sooner or later end up begging for someone to take advantage of. Begging for someone to take care of them. Because they have not learned how to take care of themselves be ever holding up their end of a relationship.