You know what? I keep trying to tell people nobody is right nor wrong and everybody still bickers like children... I am hated upon for being human not brothers in arms not even cared or looked after forced to live my life follow my dreams and heart... My cat has feelings and it looks to me for comfort and consideration in knowing me more than anybody... what I have to say does not even matter I am probably the only person in the world that is correct because every side simply must have it their way this issue or not it has to be the correct way cause someone else said so... and that's what you know not what you personally believe you're being fed like sheep to follow someone else's identity making you the same people that anything I have to say period is being argued amongst grown men that have no value or acceptance of another's way of life all of us is wrong and it's my way or the highway move out? And I am just walking away...

Other than that I keep an open mind to learning new things google can teach a chimp brain surgery so if anything is possible is that none of us is right nor wrong we keep fighting each other over such said beliefs and all we are is... millions of years old.... yet history and the bible say thousands... something gave us this realization to our genetic being all of us cross bed and are off distant cousins a man in Africa is related to me somehow me being in United states and white... over and over this branch of having any kind of genetics that all of us popped up and mingled is false we simply have over populated the planet some multiple partners some find love all of us is simply misunderstood and wondering our own existence who's to say all of us isn't crazy?

Madness, provided it comes as the gift of heaven, is the channel by which we receive the greatest blessings... the men of old who gave things their names saw no disgrace or reproach in madness; otherwise they would not have connected it with the name of the noblest of arts, the art of discerning the future, and called it the manic art... So, according to the evidence provided by our ancestors, madness is a nobler thing than sober sense... madness comes from God, whereas sober sense is merely human.
Plato

If they do not I'll try not to grieve carry on like I always do... she deserves a lot in life and not sure on her general thoughts she told me some of it between us.... who she is is rather sweet and vividly crazy and unique a real fire cracker a deepest sense of a poet even though she will not share hers ;) I think there is more to be explored in this one that well it's up to her or not? That I can say all these things is breathtaking sincere and regardless maybe even reckless embarrassing who she is is important to me check your thread on pain and what keeps you moving forward to hear why i'm saying this to her...

I have a lot views I'm not typically Christian ordained but this is my story my reason for hope me essense for life...

Was driving along the road midnight around there and the next thing I know it hits dark and all goes black I hear a sound of rumbling and the scraping of steel... i'm blacked out... I wake up my window is smashed in I had hit a bridge just a near oversight. The tire wheels are spinning into the floorboards... on my side... I let go of the gas if I had not been broken I would have plunged in the river... it's a deep night I feel my head to feel inside and put two finger tips inside my own head... this scar remains and still hurts a tad if pressed I also have a thing that looks like a permanent hickey from that wreck... I walk down the road flag down help maybe knock on some doors... middle of the night no one's coming around... it had been awhile I was knocked out and given the situation dead of night this old couple drop by country road my own residential neighborhood do not know such said people they have a phone being old timers or not and call police and ambulance... I was able to walk to flag down help and when in the gurney the crew is telling jokes just another day for them worst day in my life for me... at the hospital I am on the bed examined I had 79 liaisons and needed 150 stitches still came within an inch of severing my aiorta… something saved me that night because the car insurance adjuster tells me he's seen a lot of accidents and some of them in less damage that he was actually stunned and in awe I was alive and well and not missing body parts I didn't even use Vicodin they gave me... the people in less accidents had safer vehicles than my 95' Ranger and given the situation of is any of us not meant to exist... I couldn't answer that some people die some live only things that truly matter is how much time we actually have left to tell people how much they mean to us new or old friends relatives...

Was driving along the road midnight around there and the next thing I know it hits dark and all goes black I hear a sound of rumbling and the scraping of steel... i'm blacked out... I wake up my window is smashed in I had hit a bridge just a near oversight. The tire wheels are spinning into the floorboards... on my side... I let go of the gas if I had not been broken I would have plunged in the river... it's a deep night I feel my head to feel inside and put two finger tips inside my own head... this scar remains and still hurts a tad if pressed I also have a thing that looks like a permanent hickey from that wreck... I walk down the road flag down help maybe knock on some doors... middle of the night no one's coming around... it had been awhile I was knocked out and given the situation dead of night this old couple drop by country road my own residential neighborhood do not know such said people they have a phone being old timers or not and call police and ambulance... I was able to walk to flag down help and when in the gurney the crew is telling jokes just another day for them worst day in my life for me... at the hospital I am on the bed examined I had 79 liaisons and needed 150 stitches still came within an inch of severing my aiorta… something saved me that night because the car insurance adjuster tells me he's seen a lot of accidents and some of them in less damage that he was actually stunned and in awe I was alive and well and not missing body parts I didn't even use Vicodin they gave me... the people in less accidents had safer vehicles than my 95' Ranger and given the situation of is any of us not meant to exist... I couldn't answer that some people die some live only things that truly matter is how much time we actually have left to tell people how much they mean to us new or old friends relatives...

But being a lady she can only look at such words and wonder if i'm simply the truth or if I'm just another poser to explore her heart make her smile does she remember why I kept following her My words are true she has conversations who she is is rather peculiar that she'd climb thing to beat me down :)

If only she knew all this, Latin women po causes nails to cut a man into two like steel knives you're never the same you think twice I wonder if this is even nice she'd give me a hug or slap me just for fun :(

I don't know why any of us knights in shining armor are so lost
little boys playing swords dedicated unto you I feel happy
And this tears away of who I am making me wonder right from wrong
I keep up this game of shadows and always lose who I'm looking for is not real has not been there for me
I saw someone so beautiful inside and out greet me at the doors and I didn't want to go out and say it but I did and you said thank you
I cannot say I am perfect or that I'm 100% kind
What I am is a man trying to look past my own scars of what keeps me sane in this world
This reality check....
Cause each and every night I dream of the future it tears me apart no matter how vivid I saw it exists it happened fate wise torturing me
Who I am is really someone very simple
A shy geekily boy had an sweetness about him
This boy grew up got tore apart by the world I could no longer understand my own pain my own trauma my own inhibitions to really better myself
That that man grew up worked to the bone decided to keep writing keep measuring his greatness through the pen rather than the sword
And my heart shattered reveling this boy again...
Someone that no matter how deep I have felt I am dreamless
And you deserve happiness
I think you deserve me
You saw in me unwrapped talent that fit me like a glove
That words pour out of me like honey
And if always on my mind... who I am does not seem to care I want you to test those waters
And keep building ships off to shore to keep me from drowning
If I am to save myself it is because of you I see any right from wrong
Any truth to this so given world and who you are is this royal gem
Worth garnishing worth exploring and if I can fight this darkness you are the light
You are the way to salvation versus anything I may have wanted
Someone that obviously cares about me so much to keep responding to my blasphemous calls that I keep up being the man of her dreams and everything to her simply because she was always with me
In my heart...
If you need time to keep up this life I respect that
I see a movie like Jerry McGuire playing and it's the same story different people different places
Each of us torn apart to better ourselves
A Capricorn will go completely bonkers when in love and I cannot wait for the next dosage treatment
You are my sky my hopes my ambitions to see you succeed hurting you would demolish me tearing me apart if I did have such dreams walking away from you would be a tragedy
And giving you time is the key to understanding myself better why I exist maybe even to see you happy to know me...
Forever dedicated to a Queen of true virtue that steals the night like a storm always in mind of value I carry a strength to carry on....

People have mocked me my whole life I honestly it's like 50 cent taking another bullet it stings but I keep on living. I'm old tired and nothing anybody says matters I can get upset but it never solves anything other than their own drama... people hate it that i'm honest people hate it that I actually have a heart give a care... Who I am is a Capricorn that will always protect his mate no matter how shrilled she gets when I choose her... it can take a long long time for a Cap to find this person when they do is devoted to protecting his family keeping his wife happy at best and raising his children providing them with experience and knowledge... sorry I don't hang out at the beach as much I've been there the sand got in me so much I got little pebbles in my belly button I can try to ignore what people do but it's all the same crap anyway that I have a talent a voice of opinion a lot of what I say can be sarcastic to just prove a point...

I was looking up myself online to see what the world knew about me found out more about my books than the man himself... Yet when I look up the book itself it's misdirected... Who I am does not exist? I keep smiling painting pictures with words being unnoticed because of some factors if I really listened to a woman she could tell me a lot of good positive qualities in myself. And likewise on the web know nothing about me? Just the work I produce...

Each year gets deeper trees nestle in grass becomes dewy and soft I feel alive as a butterfly truly making my own way be heard... Who I am is happy unremorseful and free to be pluckered at like a dandelion exposing myself even more... I am simply wishing to be thought of as someone unique weird and talented with a good caring heart... words that pour out like honey... but no matter how deep I get or happy or moody this person keeps me content to just be me pushing me to keep doing things for her... and before I know it she pushed me so hard I look back and I moved an entire mountain to let her pass onto the valley...

It is the deepest night I have dreamed of you
A wondering star a long lost ghost I miss the most
To walk by you to graze your face
Falling into madness have I ruled my kindom justly and fair
Have I given you your say so your will to be
You are everything to me and I can't let go
Not knowing what keeps time from slipping
And each time I see you I wonder if I'm losing faith or exploring opportunities

And I can keep writing this stuff on end
Go to a ballpark enjoy the game
I can go skating in the park
It's all the same why bother going out at all
To engage with other people to laugh to cry
To fall in love with hoping she loves me a long while
It is better to love once than not at all but I honestly
If you want to know me I am more likely to fall for the sounds of your words than you as a person
And in meeting that person love them more because of such said unspoken words
I'm a writer it's what I do...
This path I am looking for unconquered my deepest hopes my dreams my fears
If you're not willing to meet up with me take my hand guide me to love you for all you're worth
I never will know love...
I love myself I love my talent I love even when I am torn apart and scared
What I want is some sort of pen pal some really deep minded blonde girl with a deep sense of heart and character really sweet
Someone that I have always wanted and while she exists in this present world through some sort of reality of my hopes and dreams she keeps listening to me not saying hi
A lot of people read my posts that I'm deep and likewise goofy
What I want is to enjoy life for you to take my hand
And as said you have more talent than I do...
You keep pretending I don't notice you and keep up this game of if we're going to bump into each other
But I'm not budging I'm going to take care of my life as needed
Keep writing keep posting things that help me further my talent and I will still be a shadow compared to you...
Or maybe what I think about you is so great my talent has no real meaning just empty words some find pretty or pretty annoying :)

Madness, provided it comes as the gift of heaven, is the channel by which we receive the greatest blessings... the men of old who gave things their names saw no disgrace or reproach in madness; otherwise they would not have connected it with the name of the noblest of arts, the art of discerning the future, and called it the manic art... So, according to the evidence provided by our ancestors, madness is a nobler thing than sober sense... madness comes from God, whereas sober sense is merely human.
Plato

What else did he mean by that? We can keep second guessing our nature that they are different or keep acknowledging our productivity is to keep these people mind warped or not? To keep them talented doing the same shifts they suffer regardless of medical aid while it can help some pills hurt at times... To better answer this piece a great philosopher wrote is any of us not any madder than the other? Some might tell you to lighten up buddy you're too tense not seeing this side of you that is not deep but simplistic, caring, kind, stupid, smart, an a hole, a enigma, a deep person, someone cute, someone funny, someone bland and boring... we all become this role to fill our knowledge of who we were five minutes ago replaced with the unknown this deeper chamber into our own fears? What else is there in life but to keep guessing pondering our own existence and saying you know what? Screw it... I got to move on with today's life and fix the car...

Napoleon Bonerparts just like the general leads a massive front mission to conquer the world and failed miserably at the battle of waterloo... this scene is considered classic and discouraging I have not seen this scene played out but have heard just like the leader is where his career plummeted... People online tell a lot of stories *twiddles lips*

Brilliantly put... No matter what we must endure this pain to keep moving... I have had a constant need for cigarettes have smoked a ton in my life I am a light smoker today but while working if on the floor for five hours if not given a chance to break continue on knowing darn well i'm going to start firing up as soon as I hit the clock or break room.

I am without thought some random woman looked at my profile I was drawn in baptized drawn into her thought this is the one perhaps... felt my words just appearing before my fingers... just for her to turn into a robot offering me free sex... I am stupid regardless of any given notion :P That whatever is making us feel "love" could be misguided and delusional.... any rational thought of the concept is because we kept up this commitment to be with our partners turning it into love a given choice not this epic destiny although I can honestly claim to have seen into the future at times for it to play out in reality... That I had no interest in writing until a friend introduced it to me and knew I could be a writer later on I almost flunked 11th grade English and after I decided not to join the army for given a circumstance turned to writing my life flushed my hopes gone I carried on and made an effort to keep moving balancing myself... Idk what category to put this under so I Just labeled it into Creative writing... Other examples of this weird psychic ability I possess are having empathy that I feel the other person through my own self though I know it's not from me... And likewise as said having a dream to come true is walking around on a video game in a dream and for the exact scene the same woman I dreamed about following me saying nothing... I had muted such said so connection off my friendslist on that game and she was following me just like the dream... this could go under writing or phenominal experiences either or can be moved to as such...

Living with a mental problem... still making an effort to better myself encouraging others to achieve their dreams getting kicked around spit upon and still trying to make people laugh and smile... Every day of my life is pain... And regardless I still strive to make each and everyday worthwhile enjoyable and unique I can honestly say some of my worst days turned into my best simply because I found the will to smile at night :)...

My IQ is tested around 130 - 140 range and still am thought to be retarded :)

Chocolate, tear gas and other people smiling

A poet exists for many purposes sometimes are not grammatically correct. This attracts even deeper people all of us waste time in life doing what we love those of us who work, which I wish was everyone but to each their own we all struggled at one point...
keep doing what they love even when they hate it been made fun of for it... maybe even to say o'well I am who I am? Not everyone understands me a lot of people I really can't say I blame them either but I am still human as they are...