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Topic: Why is Money such an issue in all relationships?
LonelyButLooking1's photo
Thu 11/14/13 12:17 PM
Why is money such an issue in relationships......the love of money is the root of all evil!!! so where does this come into play with love? If you truly love someone shouldn't you love their heart and not their pocket book?

LonelyButLooking1's photo
Thu 11/14/13 12:20 PM
I mean God forbid....what if something happens with the government and it happens to where the banks shut down and the stores close and we are all left to fend for ourselves....wouldn't a woman want a man that could help her to survive in other ways besides paying bills and buying expensive shoes??

sparkyae5's photo
Thu 11/14/13 12:40 PM
Edited by sparkyae5 on Thu 11/14/13 01:02 PM
its not really the money most times its security-as men we are expected to provide and protect the ladies-and be strong emotionally- they do want us to crack under life's pressures--what they say they want [on a conscious level] and what they really want [emotional level] are not the same-- good luck-- you will need it--they in most cases will test you and it will come from nowhere-- like i said good luck--

ShannonLee1970's photo
Thu 11/14/13 12:49 PM
Money should never play a part in the happiness of a relationship..2 people together should as one be able to survive the same with or without it..yea it will be hard at times but those are the time you should band together and use each others strengths..a women should feel security with a man no matter how big his wallet is..I personally would rather live in a card board box with the one I love than in a mansion..I'm a jeans n t-shirt kinda girl..always stand behind what comes out of my mouth, if you don't prolly shouldn't be talking :))

no photo
Thu 11/14/13 01:07 PM
Edited by Ouizee on Thu 11/14/13 01:08 PM

Why is money such an issue in relationships......the love of money is the root of all evil!!! so where does this come into play with love? If you truly love someone shouldn't you love their heart and not their pocket book?

I think there's a couple of things at play here!

If you marry young and you are both working, you get used to the flow of money coming in. Two wages are very nice and leave lots extra for "entertainment" and "clothing" for your active social life. Then come the children and the mortgage and the credit card bill, etc. You both got used to spending in most cases. And now money seems to be tight! Arguments do begin as stress heightens!

All it takes is one of you to be the "spender" of money you don't have. Some people don't seem to grow out of the spending mode! The claim that they "need" the newest technology, the new game station, the new cell phone, ... I think the main problem is that they've never learned to differentiate between needs and wants!

Money shouldn't be an issue as long as you are both living within your means.

What ever happened to doing things that are fun that don't cost anything? To me it's not what you're doing, it's who you're doing it with! flowerforyou

no photo
Thu 11/14/13 01:21 PM
I think it really depends. From my experiences money only becomes an issue when one or both of the partners have money/honesty/trust/reliability issues. Overall I don't think money is that important in a healthy relationship.

dcastelmissy's photo
Thu 11/14/13 03:37 PM
I personally would never let money become and issue in my relationship. We would manage one way or another. Money becomes an issue in a relationship only between people who just can't manage it. :smile:

no photo
Thu 11/14/13 03:49 PM
Because, if she doesn't have money, she can't buy me horror movies.

peachy78's photo
Thu 11/14/13 04:22 PM
Money has never been a deciding factor for me in a relationship. My ex-husband and I did fight about it A LOT though, but that's because I was bringing it in, but then when I went to pay bills it was gone. All spent on drugs. Hence him being my ex.

no photo
Thu 11/14/13 04:26 PM
Money is always an issue if there is never enough...

ohwell

raboateng09's photo
Fri 11/15/13 07:20 AM
I always taught love was the main ingredient in relationships until my girl friend left me for another man. so now I am striving to make more money before I find another one.

no photo
Fri 11/15/13 09:29 AM
Edited by Mark_the_Man on Fri 11/15/13 09:31 AM
Well I don't think it should ever be the focal point of a relationship, but abuse of funds you and your other rely on for your own security is a violation of trust and diminishes affection, encourages fear, and can lead to a a whole host of other problems that wouldn't have existed in the first place had you or had they been more responsible.

For good or ill, life here can't be supported without money, and it follows then that neither can a successful relationship.

nainiea's photo
Fri 11/15/13 09:29 AM
i think not really in ALL relationships...its just ONE of d issues a relationship cld go thru...it depends on where they are and what they have or can afford...it shld just work two way...when real love gets in,it cnt be bought how much money its worth.

peachy78's photo
Fri 11/15/13 09:32 AM
My Mom always told me its just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as it is to fall in love with a poor man...I just need to figure out where these rich men are hiding! Lol

Goofball73's photo
Fri 11/15/13 12:05 PM
Because women always want shoes or purses. I mean...they have to have a closet full. And dudes need beer and big screen TV's. It's maddening. grumble laugh

Dodo_David's photo
Fri 11/15/13 02:12 PM

Why is money such an issue in relationships......the love of money is the root of all evil!!! so where does this come into play with love? If you truly love someone shouldn't you love their heart and not their pocket book?


Money is an issue because some people are in love with a particular lifestyle that money can buy.

no photo
Fri 11/15/13 02:15 PM

Because women always want shoes or purses. I mean...they have to have a closet full. And dudes need beer and big screen TV's. It's maddening. grumble laugh


I don't want shoes. I admit I do want purses. But I buy my own.laugh

And in regard to why money is "always an issue in relationships" it's only an issue when one or both people don't have any, or when one person tries to control the spending of another. My solution to that is, his money is his money and my money is my money and voila, problem solved.:banana:

Dodo_David's photo
Fri 11/15/13 02:24 PM

My solution to that is, his money is his money and my money is my money and voila, problem solved.:banana:


I have money? Not unless Congress raises my monthly SSDI payment. :tongue:

no photo
Fri 11/15/13 02:33 PM
huh

PacificStar48's photo
Fri 11/15/13 03:01 PM
Too often people use or abuse of money is a power play and it really trashes the relationship.

So many people really have lousy money skills and that can cause a lot of stress. I think the "stress fighting" over money is really more often the core issue. Everyone makes money mistakes but if you can never get forgiveness or co-operation in doing the "money thing" better then relationships will circle the drain fast.

Some relationships flounder from money success because when the sharing and struggling fade that united challenge fades and distance grows or people get their values mixed up in their net worth and all the hustlers telling them what they want to hear rather tan the truth.

Particularly sad when parents let kids become money hustlers because it sure is not love teaching a kid by endorsement of that behavior that it is acceptable in any relationship.


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