Topic: Virtual medium & rude behaviour
Kevin's photo
Fri 04/16/21 08:00 PM
Does the virtual medium bring out darker shades of our nature that we would otherwise keep veiled?
Can we exhibit rude behavior here, without second thoughts?

motowndowntown's photo
Fri 04/16/21 09:11 PM
Of course.

Just look at the BDSM posts.

no photo
Sat 04/17/21 01:32 PM
Does the virtual medium bring out darker shades of our nature that we would otherwise keep veiled?

When phrased like that, not really.
People are just people.
People banging themselves on the foot with a hammer isn't due to the "hammer medium."

People want to "bring out darker shades" of their nature, fulfill self interest, so they look for things that help them do so.

"The internet" is basically just businesses people use that are ultimately catering to providing what people want.

The "virtual medium" isn't making victims of people to the "darker shades" of their nature.
The "darker shades" of people are transforming the internet to what they want it to be, as the internet has enough elasticity to cater to it.

People that say things like "I'm addicted to the internet! I'm addicted to social media! I'm addicted to the forums! I'm addicted to technology!" are simply going through mental gymnastics for the sake of rationalizing behavior.

Can we exhibit rude behavior here, without second thoughts?

Sure.

no photo
Tue 05/04/21 06:57 AM

Of course.

Just look at the BDSM posts.


hey Motown.. psst. which posts?

asking for a friend

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Tue 05/04/21 07:51 AM

Does the virtual medium bring out darker shades of our nature that we would otherwise keep veiled?
Can we exhibit rude behavior here, without second thoughts?


Well, I do know of some fora where you do not really want to raise any subject as regardless what it is, you get horrific chit poured out over you. Best to not become a member there.
In a way I think it depends on the rules and what the mods do to keep it civil. But there clearly are places and people that don't hold back at all and I seriously doubt they'd go through life that way. They'd have permanent black eyes and prolly their teeth knocked out if they did, hihi.

And it is easier to make callous comments that you normally wouldn't so easily make.

But I also have been member of fora where people were great, supportive, loving, caring. These were mostly spiritual fora.

So I do think the 'I don't know you personally' bit of social media can indeed make people harsher and more rude than they'd be in real life. Chances are high you will never meet the people you gave chit, so no risk of losing your teeth, hihi.

Tom4Uhere's photo
Tue 05/04/21 08:03 AM
Edited by Tom4Uhere on Tue 05/04/21 08:04 AM
Doesn't a thread with this subject already exist in m2 forums...recently?
Not worded the same but the same subject?

How you portray yourself thru online interaction reflects yourself.
If your personification is rude online, chances are high you are rude offline.

When a persona is used for online anonymity it reflects elements of the true personality.
Someone who is rude online shows their capacity to be rude in person.

Usually defended with "I'm just playing" indicates that capacity is easily reached and the rude behavior means little to them.

Play acting is sourced from somewhere.

This holds true online and off.
In person, if someone is play acting, chances are they draw that persona from their personality.

A person who is not rude will not choose rude behavior in their personas.

Professional actors work hard to build convincing personas. It often involves research and observation of the personalities they are trying to mimic.
Even professional actors have trouble removing adapted personas from their personalities when their acting job is over.

Almost all absurdity of conduct rises from the imitation
of those whom we cannot resemble.

~ Samuel Johnson

We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others,
That in the end we become disguised to ourselves.

~ François de La Rochefoucauld

You are who you pretend to be,
so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.

~ Kurt Vonnegut

soufiehere's photo
Tue 05/04/21 08:16 AM


Of course.

Just look at the BDSM posts.


hey Motown.. psst. which posts?

asking for a friend
hahahahahahahaha

Kenzie's photo
Tue 05/04/21 08:23 AM
People instinctively talk more freely over the internet, where we're less subjected to judgement.

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Tue 05/04/21 08:41 AM


Of course.

Just look at the BDSM posts.


hey Motown.. psst. which posts?

asking for a friend

You gotta be quick when they're there...
These danged mods are fast!!




***Thank goodness for our wonderful moderators!***
flowerforyou :heart: flowerforyou

Rock's photo
Sat 05/15/21 05:55 PM
*Belch!*

Dodo_David's photo
Sat 05/15/21 06:59 PM

no photo
Sat 05/15/21 08:33 PM
The internet can be a dark place .. but I have always considered mingle tame in comparison . I guess it depends on what sites you have been exposed to biggrin

As for being rude .. often there is a cultural or personality clash involved . Sadly not having English as a first language can make someone an easy target . Whether that projection is rudeness or boredom it is not always apparent .

Topics can also be a source of conflict . Sexuality or politics often become heated and disrespectful , when there are opposing values or an unwillingness to consider other viewpoints .. frustration and rudeness can quickly turn to personal attacks .

Online ,there will always be potential for written communication to be misunderstood or misinterpreted , or for a poster to be targeted rather than the topic .

Di, soufie and kristi do a fair job of keeping the mingle forums civil and inclusive .

Now ..did someone mention BDSM drool drool tongue2






Güney's photo
Sun 05/16/21 01:38 AM
Edited by Güney on Sun 05/16/21 01:39 AM
I had to close my account on Reddit, I was using my name and picture being direct and honest but most people weren't and they were rude, weird (for me) or maybe just being their true selves with aliases. I did that because I was only subjected to Escorts, Frauds, Gun lovers (nothing wrong with it -if in moderation of course) and just fake internet people. But surprisingly out of all in a dating site (with my short experience being here) people are less like that! In the end who would have thought?

Güney's photo
Sun 05/16/21 09:58 AM
Today I got messaged by another person asking for Amazon Gift Card with a fake name and photos...

delightfulillusion's photo
Sun 05/16/21 10:06 AM

Today I got messaged by another person asking for Amazon Gift Card with a fake name and photos...


Please report those members by using the report system in place.

no photo
Sun 05/16/21 03:54 PM

Does the virtual medium bring out darker shades of our nature that we would otherwise keep veiled?
Can we exhibit rude behavior here, without second thoughts?



Of course. You have to have a thick skin to put up with the messages and posts you get on social media and I am not meaning latex.


Auto's photo
Mon 05/17/21 12:17 AM
You get back what you give.
So if you're being rude with your comments or towards someone then the rudeness will come back to you.

Same as if you're being nice then everyone around you will be nice to you.

And if you are being naughty, well......

Toodygirl5's photo
Tue 05/18/21 10:08 AM
Rude people are more prevalent on some sites.

Kevin's photo
Thu 05/20/21 06:37 AM
Well, how would it be if we actually discuss these in real time, in a virtual meeting? Is it feasible? If most of the active members on this thread agree, I may arrange for a zoom or google meeting on the next weekend.

Tom4Uhere's photo
Thu 05/20/21 07:50 AM

Well, how would it be if we actually discuss these in real time, in a virtual meeting? Is it feasible? If most of the active members on this thread agree, I may arrange for a zoom or google meeting on the next weekend.

The topic/subject of this thread doesn't merit a forum change.
There's been one page of replies in a month and most of those replies consist of less than a paragraph.
Not what I would call a 'hot' topic of discussion, even for M2 forums.
How likely do you think it is members here would leave this site to participate in a distraction banter at a forum dedicated to this subject?

This forum is idle entertainment at best.
Online community forums are not as popular as they were 10-15 years ago.
Even well-established discussion fourms are less populated and less diverse.
Online discussions have been "twitterized".

In the past, if you were very interested in a subject you could do a search and you would see a multitude of community forums about the subject on the first page of results.
Now, the few you see are buried 5-10 pages deep in the results and most of those are twitterized discussions.

actually discuss these in real time, in a virtual meeting? Is it feasible?

Not anymore...Not an actual rational discussion...those are now the domain of "experts" and 'authorities'.