Topic: Divorce papers:o)
no photo
Fri 11/14/14 07:31 PM

I guess some men look at their marital status in a different way from women. I am separated too....7 long years and waiting to sign the papers to finally be considered free and single. But not my soon to be ex.....he is contented to still be 'married' and yet he starts a family somewhere without being actually 'free', and still dragging his feet about this too.

I would not get into a relationship with someone who is still in a legally binding marriage, though they may even be separated for 20 years...and I did walk away when I found out he was still married!


Amelinng if separation is delayed by him your hands may be tied for a while. Not forever. However, there is an obvious difference in attitudes between you and your ex, which speaks volumes. You are not a person who wants to sit on two chairs at the same time.
I hope you will close that chapter of your life soon, leave the past behind and feel happy and free again.
Let's celebrate it together here on Mingle! flowerforyou

Amelinng's photo
Fri 11/14/14 07:42 PM


I guess some men look at their marital status in a different way from women. I am separated too....7 long years and waiting to sign the papers to finally be considered free and single. But not my soon to be ex.....he is contented to still be 'married' and yet he starts a family somewhere without being actually 'free', and still dragging his feet about this too.

I would not get into a relationship with someone who is still in a legally binding marriage, though they may even be separated for 20 years...and I did walk away when I found out he was still married!


Amelinng if separation is delayed by him your hands may be tied for a while. Not forever. However, there is an obvious difference in attitudes between you and your ex, which speaks volumes. You are not a person who wants to sit on two chairs at the same time.
I hope you will close that chapter of your life soon, leave the past behind and feel happy and free again.
Let's celebrate it together here on Mingle! flowerforyou


ONJ..flowerforyou flowerforyou
I have taken the first step out by mingling....love all you guys/gals in Mingle town! Makes me laugh, I need that.
I have done my :cry: and the well is dry (I hope)!! Thanks for your kind kind words!flowers

no photo
Fri 11/14/14 07:51 PM


ONJ..flowerforyou flowerforyou
I have taken the first step out by mingling....love all you guys/gals in Mingle town! Makes me laugh, I need that.
I have done my :cry: and the well is dry (I hope)!! Thanks for your kind kind words!flowers



That's a good sign. smile2 You are stronger now and your wings are growing. You'll get there. Don't worry. You will.:thumbsup: And than, we shall celebrate! :banana:
May I bring fireworks to that party? LOL

Amelinng's photo
Fri 11/14/14 08:40 PM



ONJ..flowerforyou flowerforyou
I have taken the first step out by mingling....love all you guys/gals in Mingle town! Makes me laugh, I need that.
I have done my :cry: and the well is dry (I hope)!! Thanks for your kind kind words!flowers



That's a good sign. smile2 You are stronger now and your wings are growing. You'll get there. Don't worry. You will.:thumbsup: And than, we shall celebrate! :banana:
May I bring fireworks to that party? LOL


LOL.....ONJ!! You are good for my spirits! We will party when it is done....roll out the food & fireworks!drinks

no photo
Fri 11/14/14 10:20 PM




ONJ..flowerforyou flowerforyou
I have taken the first step out by mingling....love all you guys/gals in Mingle town! Makes me laugh, I need that.
I have done my :cry: and the well is dry (I hope)!! Thanks for your kind kind words!flowers



That's a good sign. smile2 You are stronger now and your wings are growing. You'll get there. Don't worry. You will.:thumbsup: And than, we shall celebrate! :banana:
May I bring fireworks to that party? LOL


LOL.....ONJ!! You are good for my spirits! We will party when it is done....roll out the food & fireworks!drinks


Can't wait! LOL

davidben1's photo
Fri 11/14/14 10:57 PM
Edited by davidben1 on Fri 11/14/14 11:00 PM
if one seek state "officials" to make it's union as recognized to it self and all others as valid, than one must also recognize it will be only when all "officials" recognize it's union as legally dissolved, that all whom believe in the state and officials will deem it to be be equally so.

now pay up!

10,000 euro's i believe one said it self would be paid.

peterbrorsson's photo
Sat 11/15/14 12:19 AM

I get what you're saying.. in your mind, it's over.. so women should trust in your feelings towards them along with your uttered reassurances, and disregard the fact that there's still a piece of paper (your marriage license) that's binding you yet, to another woman...

if I may state the obvious.. women can be as territorial as men in relationships(as well as other areas admittedly).. we like to think we're the ONLY one in our 'mans' life.. and because there are women (and men) who take the sanctity of marriage very seriously.. it's oftentimes hard to overcome the 'feeling' that our MAN can't totally commit to the current relationship, until that paperwork is done!

in other words.. perhaps these women ran because they didn't feel you were 'free' enough to REALLY be with them in a committed relationship, regardless of the affections you showed them AND you saying "trust me"!

some may also perceive that without 'doing the paperwork', you may one day return to your ex (having unfinished business with them perhaps? still hold a torch for perhaps?) and are leaving your options open by NOT finalizing the divorce! that said.. if you have a flippant(or unconcerned) attitude towards the marriage relationship itself.. some may surmise that maybe you're a) not ready to move on, or b) relationships in themselves aren't AS important to you, causing the sense that the current relationship isn't worth fighting for! if you follow...

tell me.. if you were reading a book.. would you start another book beFORE finishing the first? or watch a movie or TV show only 3/4 of the way through then change the channel or switch the DVD? it's similar in principal when you think about it for a moment.. the logic is.. finish what you've started THEN move on with the next project.. be it book.. movie.. or relationship!

but that's just MY opinion flowerforyou


Hi, that was a well thought and balanced post! + with a wish to understand the question! Look, I'm not asking this in order to complain, I'm just curious and like to have discussions!
Flowers right back at you:o)

peterbrorsson's photo
Sat 11/15/14 12:35 AM


Would it help speed the divorce process along, if your wife knew you were on the interwebz, claiming to be separated?


It's not a part of the question but ok. I don't believe marriage makes any difference regarding faith in each other. So yes, I'm a bit lazy about pushing thru the divorce. However, It's my wife that drags her legs behind regarding divorce. But that's of topic…..

Peter

davidben1's photo
Sat 11/15/14 12:40 AM
if one ignored it's wife's words as mine, whom you owe 10,000 euro's, than no no wonder one seek out only the flattering opinions flattering of one self...

hah...

cheese doth mold when it but try to pasteurize it self....

cheesy men only get cheesy women.

some men don't even deserve cheesy women.

no photo
Sat 11/15/14 12:41 AM
It's just a bit of paper which guarantees jack ****!~

Introduce them to your ex LOL

peterbrorsson's photo
Sat 11/15/14 12:47 AM

if one ignored it's wife's words as mine, whom you owe 10,000 euro's, than no no wonder one seek out only the flattering opinions flattering of one self...

hah...

cheese doth mold when it but try to pasteurize it self....

cheesy men only get cheesy women.

some men don't even deserve cheesy women.



Sorry if I ignored you before but will continue doing that from this post!

davidben1's photo
Sat 11/15/14 12:58 AM
hehehe...

OMG!

my feelins are so hurt!

tears

your quote below!

Now here'��s my 10 000 EURO question. (I will not pay until satisfactory answer occurs and I'll judge it;o)

so of course, you shall ignore me quoting the very words you spoke, just as you did her when she reminded you of all the words you told her!

smiles...

please feel free to ignore me all you wish, as each moment you ignore another, 10 others shall be sent to ignore one self....

hehehehe...

and some think they are so coy, and so wise, and so trample and blame their poor wives who are not here to defend their side of the one sided story told...

hah...

it shall be a great day in mortal time when only what be shown love or mercy be only what deserve love or mercy.

drinker


davidben1's photo
Sat 11/15/14 01:01 AM
please, will somebody pass the syrup for my taters please.

graywolf55's photo
Sat 11/15/14 02:14 AM
:thumbsup: Just a suggestion: If you really want a Divorce, Check your State Laws, It Can happen!! If your spouse just wants to hold on like they have ownership papers on you (Marriage License) You and a Judge can end it yourselves! I've done it!! Anyone that allows it is also just as Guilty for one reason or another in staying in an unwanted Marriage for whatever the reason! Get your unfinished business done and then move on in life!! Just moving on solves nothing and involves an innocent person!! And again its still called (Adultery,Cheating!!) :thumbsup: Then Move On in Life!!drinks My X didn't sign the Divorce Papers" Me and a Judge did!!" Surprised the Hell out of Her!!:angel: tongue2

no photo
Sat 11/15/14 02:26 AM
Decision making and consequences belongs together.

When a man is not willing to fully cut off the former marriage, how will he handle the next relationship?

One door has to be fully closed before you open another.

Honor your former wife by giving her 10.000 Euro! slaphead

graywolf55's photo
Sat 11/15/14 02:46 AM
winking Agree!! Most of the time it involves one of two things,(Money or Control)!! Throw a dollar in the air,its just like a dime. The dollar may be slower getting to the ground than the dime, but the results are the same (heads or tails)!! drinks The Beginning,The End and The Beginning again!! tongue2

no photo
Sat 11/15/14 03:06 AM
I was with a man who lied to me about being divorced..in fact he was not divorced after 20 years of separating...it does mean something about the man I found out...they are players and users with no respect for anyone else..these type of men are not worthy.

Rock's photo
Sat 11/15/14 03:58 AM
Edited by Rock on Sat 11/15/14 04:04 AM



Would it help speed the divorce process along, if your wife knew you were on the interwebz, claiming to be separated?


It's not a part of the question but ok. I don't believe marriage makes any difference regarding faith in each other. So yes, I'm a bit lazy about pushing thru the divorce. However, It's my wife that drags her legs behind regarding divorce. But that's of topic…..

Peter

Just because my response didn't validate you, doesn't make it "off topic".

In your own words, you admit to being lazy about getting a divorce, and further claim your wife is the one dragging her heels.

Grow a pair, tell your wife what you're up to. I bet she'll stop dragging her heels about that divorce, you've been too lazy to tell her about.

peterbrorsson's photo
Sat 11/15/14 04:35 AM

Decision making and consequences belongs together.

When a man is not willing to fully cut off the former marriage, how will he handle the next relationship?

One door has to be fully closed before you open another.

Honor your former wife by giving her 10.000 Euro! slaphead




Well, she got more than that:wink: Fair and square share of common belongings.

peterbrorsson's photo
Sat 11/15/14 04:43 AM




Would it help speed the divorce process along, if your wife knew you were on the interwebz, claiming to be separated?


It's not a part of the question but ok. I don't believe marriage makes any difference regarding faith in each other. So yes, I'm a bit lazy about pushing thru the divorce. However, It's my wife that drags her legs behind regarding divorce. But that's of topic…..

Peter

Just because my response didn't validate you, doesn't make it "off topic".

In your own words, you admit to being lazy about getting a divorce, and further claim your wife is the one dragging her heels.

Grow a pair, tell your wife what you're up to. I bet she'll stop dragging her heels about that divorce, you've been too lazy to tell her about.


Ok, it was not my intent to drag my private life in specifics. This is the last thing I write regarding our private dealings. My wife knows my intent for sure. Further on it's a bit more complicated with different countries involved but now I stop with this. Also, I don't lie about my current situation as some seems to think…..