Yes but the list would be so long it would melt down the server.

Going to bed early; under the weather.

If stateing and opposeing opinion is considered a slap on the behind by and OP and they check themself then it is not and attack any more than ignoreing or even posting like opinions is necessarily endoresing the original post. I totally agree with letting Mods deal with abusive posts or posts that violate the rules. I don't thank that means laying down and ignoreing when someone floats a premis that is full of holes.

Being "fired" the first day is sometimes approriate when someone comes in with a nasty abusive attitude. Not then no.

I can't speak for others but I have had a life plan for most of my adult life.

I purposely married young, had a child, tied a knot in the baby making machine, and adopted a child. I raised them while I was young enough to enjoy doing it and old enough to be responsible to do a good job; 22 to 40 something. I enjoy my grandchildren occasionaly but my children raise their own just like I did. Now I am enjoying the things I set aside to be that responsible parent. It is my turn and I am not going to give that up.

If the people I run into have other plans; specificlly having children later in life, or raiseing their grandkids, and I realize that is a choice that sometimes really isn't much of a choice then they are not the right match for me.

I even limit the friends I make who "have" children because I do not want to be the friend they turn to when the inevitable demands of having children make you lean on friends. I feel I have taken that responsibility many times over and now it is someone elses turn.

It is not like I don't ever do things for children because I often do. I just don't make them a part of my day to day lifestyle. Not to say I am not tempted occasionally. I do think it is the ultimate cruelty to a child and their parent to try to be something you really don't want to be. Every child deserves to be wanted. intensely. They know when they aren't. I can guarantee that.

Would depend on the reason they were leaving. If they can't handle the being online or it causes relationship problems then being happy in the real world has to take presedence.

If it is because someone was a jerk to them and it has kind of scared them or made them feel creepy tell them that is something all internet user's run into sooner or later and don't delete the site for one bad apple. Report the problem or as the moderators for advice how to handle it. They are really very nice and helpful.

If they are leaving because they feel left out try introduceing them to people you like. Maybe they make some friends they will want to stay. It is a lot more fun when you get mail.

I would suggest to them maybe putting their profile in sleeper mode for a while rather than deactivateing. Sometimes a break from here makes it a lot more fun.

Hope they will consider staying. If they are your friend I would think they are pretty nice folk.

I don't think creativity is necessarily only present for book smart people. Sometimes what you don't know doesn't limit your imagination. Think of some of the things that started with the Thought "Oh wouldn't it be cool if" and then with the technical skills they worked it out. Invertive thinking sometimes defies original intent.

Sure thing "L" will be glad to send up prayers for you.

Somehow I think this is going to be one of those deals where one door is closed so another can be opened.

Being displaced out of work sure makes it easier to qualify for additional schooling. With a new semester I would jump on the chance to get in as the fall semester starts. You can always drop a class or two if a good job comes along.

If your income has crashed apply for assistance early. Again this is something you can dump if you don't need it. Start with utilities because it is only and option if you are not behind.

While I wouldn't turn down any job I would try to look for a really secure one. Don't overlook jobs within the faith community. Contact your Inner Faith Alliance for any one offering job search support groups. Jewish Vocational Services are awesome and it is not just for those of the Jewish faith.

If you are in a rental property be straight up with your landlord. Not always but often they will work with you rather than loose a good tenant. Sometimes you can partially pay and work off the balance cleaning other properties. Sometimes they will let you even transfer your lease to a less costly unit.

Good luck. You run into any problems email.

This premise is flawed because there are a lot more combinations.

It also assumes that all people will have the same evaluation you have. Fortuneately perception is not that universal.

It has been my experience that looks alone is never enough. The perception of beauty fades very fast with familiarity.

While the opposite is not universally enough it often is if the personality is genuinely loving and other positives.

If a newbie comes in and is nice I will make every effort to make them feel welcome. I try to respond to all threads in the spirit they seem to be posted. If someone comes in and asks a legit question even if it is redundent I try to answer. Even encourage them to think at several angels.

If they come in acting like they are doing the site some big favor lowering themselves to be here or start off whineing or bashing a previous relationship or the opposite sex in a public forum because they are too cowardly to do it in person or can't get away with it there it isn't going to pass by me here either.

Newbie or other wise a post that asks a question better be ready for the answer. You have to be an adult if you are here and if you open your mouth and are just showing your Arse I really don't care if I use reason and pointing out another view to expose that.

As hostile and brutal as that seems it really is an opportunity for that person to have a perspective that they rarely get when no one puts the mirror to their words. Calling names or curseing them or even ignoreing them has no effect. Sometimes attacking the behavior, and not the person, changes the behavior, sometimes it doesn't.

It is a fine line to walk and I am sure I have stumbled off a time or two so to those whos toes get inadvertently stepped on I humbely apologize. But one thing it doesn't do is let it go unchallenged so that it is repeated over and over. When it doesn't turn aorund the OP sometimes the only lesson is to be learned are those who watch from the sidelines. To me makes it worth the effort.

I don't think a friend lets what needs to be challenged just go by. To me Mingle is a collective friend and even the ones I find hard to like at the moment gets what I think is fair. Some times that is a hug sometimes it is a slap on the behind.

That I could have my grandchildren in my day to day life.

Nah I don't think they really spread the paint that well once they are washed out and dry. I just watch and buy them cheap at a super discounter or off season. Sometimes you can even get them super cheap at Habitat for Humanity ReStores. Always my first stop when I am planning a project.

Read your own profile. What are you really offering a young woman? Laying around watching a movie, walking in the rain, meeting your needs for useing her time, emotions, and body? Wow what an irresitable offer. You want to get love you have to make it a visable option that you are also going to give love. Since I don't see evidence, at the peak of your work life, that you have a career or any accomplishments you don't look like much of a catch. You might want to take the steps to correct that rather than complaining women don't like you because you are short or don't smile right.

I don't see picking on people you are asking help from as real productive; maybe that is what other people see you do in other settings and they loose interest before you are ever up to bat.

^5 on the "You loose 100% of the dates you don't ask."

Hopefully if you are mature enough you don't care but feelings do not go away so quickly always.

I would hope my friends would be a little more compassionate before they go full steam ahead at my left overs. Not that this is what the OP's intentions were.

Is it fair to the ditched Ex to be a social outcast? No but that is the cost of doing business with a popular woman.

A normal cooling off period would only seem in good taste for all involved.

I personally would not date and Ex of a friend period. I don't even bring boyfreinds around my friends, or coworkers, or family so I am probably much more private than most.

My son had two pediatricians Dr. David Ortballs & Dr. Harry Hymen.

As nice as it would be in some ways to go back to the earlier years I don't want to have to go through the bad again so thanks but no thanks. I will just deal with the fact that I now how choices I did not have then and the choices I don't really are not that important to the general scheme of things.

While I tend to agree that the likelyhood that only frusterateing experiences are going to occur when you insert alcohol into the social equation that was not the whole problem.

This scenario skipped over a few social mores.

First is a friend would pick up on the fact that when and "Ex" walks up and starts "hitting on" a another woman, especially a friend of and ex-girlfriend, that it is a purposeful insult or at least the most obnoxious level of arrogance.

Second breaking up by it's very nature is a failure that no one likes publiclly rubbed in their face. Even if it is to acknowledge a previous lapse in judgement later recognized, and corrected.

Third your friends felt like you betrayed them playing along with this social insult by even acknowledgeing this jerk existed.

The assumption is that if you do acknowledge their cast offs; or more insensitively ignored they were cast off, then you believe that this guy is fair game.

Fourth if you respond to this play it at least suggests that you see yourself as somehow more desireable. That you think you can reel him in when they couldn't. Not exactly a comfortable feeling.

Especially when the fifth finger of the punch, intended or not, is it happens in a very public setting with the push of alcohol to add to the humiliation.

I do believe that premature sexual relationships tend to amplify the humiliation of break ups; and I am not saying this is even a factor here; but if this Ex relationship was long enough that as a new friend you were aware of it the possibility is strong.

In a world where having a respectable boyfriend is so competative when you mix friendship with "hunting", come on being in a bar with both sexes is more the latter than the former, is a recipe for someone being low (wo)man on the totem pole.

My advice is if you still want these women to be your friend is to send a note acknowlegeing the faux pa; making no excuses. It is likely they will torture you for a while; but if you are truely able to see their side, and learn, you may have long term friends when you really need them. And believe me in real life you will.