I think you said it just fine, msharmony But thanks!

Perhaps we need to bring back dating guidelines?
1st date - public place, 2-3 hours maximum (leave em wanting more)
2nd date - public place, a few hours, maybe with mutual friends.
3rd date - holding hands and perhaps a goodbye kiss.
4th date - excited to see if that kiss holds it's promise.


Three dates should take a minimum of three weeks to occur with one phone call in between for a short chat and to confirm date 2and 3 plans. Overly simple maybe (what do I know - not having had a date in a few years) but dating is a process that should be enjoyed and leave both people an easy way to say 'thanks but no thanks'.

Since my husband died I have dated a little only to get the 'bums rush' each time. I am not rich, overly beautiful or easy, don't think I give off signs off wanting an instant roomie... Why the rush? It screams to me of neediness, desperateness, traits I do not find attractive and which send me home alone shaking my head about how grown supposedly mature men (people, I am sure this happens the other way around too) can get a simple date so wrong.

Dating means to me the casual getting together with someone of interest to see if they are still of interest after the date - goes both ways of course. It means the chance to spend some time talking, sharing a meal etc as a way to begin to get to know each other. Dating is what we do to learn if a relationship is possible and desired. Dating does not mean we are not seeing anyone else, does not mean LOVE and or that sex is rightfully expected. I think dating is a mostly lost art but would love to be proved wrong.

My wedding was small, simple and very beautiful. It was in a small chapel (nearly) on a beach in DE, my 10 year old son rang the church bells with abandon as we exchanged our "I do"s. We danced all evening with each other and loved ones, all the impromptu toasts were heart felt. Amazingly I don't think there were any of the negative under-currants so usual at family affairs. Who could ask for more? Not I.

I don't think about another wedding, don't see it happening.

As for enjoying going to weddings, I like the idealism they represent and seeing the happiness on the bride and groom's faces but don't enjoy them if they are big expensive formal affairs. Those types of weddings scream waste and ego to me.

Does staying in the car include the honeymoon?

It doesn't just happen to the young, back when I joined and was a regular here I could have excepted several proposals a month (marriage and otherwise LOL) Funniest part was that my experiences here were mimicking my 'real' life attempts to date a few years after losing my husband. A few dates and it was TRUE love! WTF you don't even know me went over like a lead balloon....

Keep posting, I got to know some great people here, some are still around and have written me saying I have been missed. (thanks you guys) Likely many new good people too, get to know regulars in the forums, get known and good things are likely to happen, if not a great love at least some great fun.

Good luck to you.

Ditto! We must be twins separated at birth!

I don't, but my mom washes her paper towels in the washing machine, hey paper products are cheap!!!

Krupa, think this beats yours????

Cheapest thing for me is living in Maine with almost no heat, lots of layers and really good blankets.

My greatest fear might be not having enough fear. Go through what I have and small stuff just stays small. I know a lot of you can relate to this too.

Of course there is the fear that the over grown, gigantic Willow tree in my yard comes crashing through my roof while I innocently sleep in my bed, doesn't immediately kill me but traps me amongst it's million limbs and keeps my from reaching the bedside phone. Slowly I die from puncture wounds....For real, on the coast of Maine we get some pretty rough wind and I do have this fear. On really windy nights (anything over 50 mph sustained winds) I tend to sleep on the sofa downstairs.

I fear being alone and sick with no one to say "yes you need to go to the ER" When sick I don't trust my own judgement.

I can't eat a banana if the skin has any spots, buy them cause I should, wait for the spots to appear and then give them to neighbors, guess I am not a banana fan.

Can't seem to keep my feet and back from hurting due to my job.

Can't seem to find a better job!

Can't stop loving my son or parents.

Can't believe that for the first time in decades most of my family (11 siblings) will be together for a party that was to be for my mom's 80th birthday but is now a Welcome Spring party because mom doesn't want the spot light.

Can't believe how long I have been away from here and you all!!

And then not well enough!!

Great pictures!!! You are one beautiful women!!!

I am sorry for your isolation, your condition is little known about and mis - understood often. I hope you are getting the right help and are able to move forward in over coming this terrible condition. I wish you only the very best.


As for me I live alone so very often eat alone etc etc etc. I do have my folks very close by so on my days off we share a meal, how nice is it to have someone else put a plate of food in front of me? VERY nice! Lucky for me I have never been shy so I can eat out or go to a movie/event alone, don't always like going alone but glad to have seen the movie or whatever the event was.

Used to do the bar scene, had a lot of fun too but too tired most of the time and to expensive!!

You would too!! Just another reason to love you!!

I cried through the end of June and all of July this summer, it sucked. Hadn't cried so much since my hubby died 11-2-05, cried for years then though. Obviously neither times were non-stop but there sure were lots of tears.

Got a little teary today while emailing my son, saying to him how another summer has come and gone without us seeing each other. It has been over 4 years now. We are very close, talk about anything and everything. Time, money and distance are the culprits.

I used to be active, now, not so much but I guess I am not a lurker, I just don't come by very often any more.

Yea! Rides for all takers!!!



What is a 745 anyway???

19! Congrats!! You are still so young, have no fear!

I had no issues with my son aging until he was turning 30!! I had no problem turning 30 myself BUT my child turning 30 was another story! I planned to have a 30th birthday freak out for months in advance...was going to buy myself expensive hand and face cream, attempt to undo the years...LOL When he did turn 30 (almost two years ago) I was sooo over myself. Instead I looked at where he is in his life, how happy he is, how in love he is with a wonderful woman and just shrugged and knew I had done my job as his mom well. Till he was 10 I was a single mom and then again when he was about 25 when my husband died, my son was still floundering then and again I helped him find his strength. I did good and I can acknowledge that. Feels good too!

Enjoy 19...it is all getting ready for him to fly the coop from here on out. Be proud of you parenting skills and love every moment with him.

Be very proud that you and his dad did this together even though you two weren't!

Hi and welcome to Mingle2, jump into the forums to start to get to know us and let us start to get to know you. There are great people here and you can have some fun too!

Good luck to you.

It really is what is on the inside that matters. Anything another person finds attractive on the outside is gravy. If you feel good about yourself - great, if not make a change.

I have been thinking about cutting my hair for some time now and the day before yesterday I had it cut. I got wonderfully nice reactions from co-workers and some of my regulars. Sometimes change is good.

Lies and liars make me crazy.