In my survey of dating sites across the internet, I have come across a consistent, rampant misunderstanding of feudal chivalry, its use in modern times, and its application for females. While it is neither my responsibility nor my obligation to correct this misunderstanding, it will not persist based on my lack of trying to spread more accurate information about chivalry.
I found the three articles I link below using the search term "��the female role in feudal chivalry"�� �- terms which I hope will avoid bias that may have arisen by using terms like the "��passive"�� female role, or the "controlling"�� female role. The results are three of the top seven returns, avoiding sites like Wikipedia, which I think would only compound the misunderstanding.

http://chivalrytoday.com/women-chivalry/

http://chivalrytoday.com/women-and-chivalry/

http://www.usna.edu/Users/history/abels/hh315/Chivalry.htm

While the first two articles are not very good -�� they do not go into detail or provide (literary, historical) examples of exactly what women did as part of chivalry - they both agree on an important point: chivalry did not reduce women to a passive or servile role either then or now.
If you take the time to scroll through the third article (an academic one, so be prepared for a read), you�'ll get a much better-supported argument for exactly what chivalry meant for medieval practitioners. If you read just part I, Abels discusses the modern re-creation of chivalry and how it was interpreted by Victorian morality. If you continue on to V.2, V.3 and VI, Abels goes into the courtly demands on knights, which is mostly where the modern confusion centers on. ("Chivalry"�� defined as being polite and nice to women, as opposed to having feudal obligations and courtly manners.)

To sum up a definition of chivalry, it is: a guiding set of principles that governed how a lower-rank noble was to interact with his feudal lord, behave at court, and manage his social inferiors.
To sum up chivalry as it applied to women of the time, women were to provide judgment, wisdom, and guidance (as decided by social consensus), and to moderate and guide violence to serve more constructive ends.

Now, I don'��t much care if this changes your perception of chivalry, or the respective roles of males and females within the structure of chivalry. I suspect most people are going to either ignore the information here, or pick it apart to help "��prove"�� their own gender-biased agenda. I'm just putting this out here so there'��s a slightly clearer understanding of what the term meant, and how bastardized it has become.

I think it would be unavoidable to not notice things that might influence me if i was thinking long term. Obvious things like cleanliness would become an issue if it was that bad. But if i liked her a lot,i would hope it would be something to work on.As for choice of books on shelves etc,as long as they weren't tutorials on bomb making or how to get rid of your partners body ,i would just be happy that she was literate and enjoyed reading as i do...

Yay ! Well done Crystal