I'm not sure how to feel right now. I'm happy that I get to move back to Cali with my son, but at the same time my friends I know out here are moving too, to where I can't just take a drive and see them. So ill be missing some things out here In UT.

For those that kind of know me. The judge signed the custody order
and I have custody of my son It's been a long three years, but well worth fighting for my son. So I can move back to Cali when I'm ready too and no one to stop me

I also just want to thank everyone that knew they helped me or not. No names just thank you all

Yep, ill put my foot down. She will be getting out in a couple weeks and I know the Ole poor me...

One thing I have learned in life is not to enable anyone. It will just keep them from growing.

I think the reason I posted this was more for me to be reminded where things really are and sometimes just chatting a little can go a long ways.

I know what your saying Andy, She is Bi-polar and has to take for medications just to be somewhat normal. A year and a half ago she was never like this and your right. The speed she does from time to time doesn't help her in anyway. My thing is if I could help and i know i can't, but it would be more on when talk to her to keep things real on how they are at that point. Talking about our son Seems to help a little, but as we all know once they are walk away. it's like you never really talked. If and when she gets clean, the rest might fall into place. But it's like you said. This is where she has to take the action and really want it before anything will change. Until then, I will be a friend, but there is limits to that on this one.

At this point id say yes. Id do all the **** were not suppose to do. Hell, it would be fun robing a bank just for the hell of it and then doing a car chase etc etc As long as no one gets hurt. Id wouldn't mind knowing i'm on my way out

Right now I have to agree with everyone as far as letting her live with me. It's not a good idea just the couple days she was here, she was acting weird. I gave her a couple days and that was it.

She is not living with me. I let her stay a couple days and it wasn't long as I was thinking. She was arrested again 2 days ago, so when she gets out. She will have to bring a officer to get her stuff. from the way she has been acting and how she was arrested. I'm not letting her back in. I gave her a couple days to find a place and in that time she did sign the agreement we have. As I sent a email to you. There is no way I can help anyone that far gone knowing they don't really want help anyway.

It's interesting being on dating sites other then the forums.I have to say that out almost all the women that have been interested in me, that checked out my profile. I had to be the one to get things rolling. I'm sure there are more that I haven't contacted that like to hid when looking at ones profile. So, I have to say that when it comes to dating. Men uaually have to be the ones to make the first contact. It is actually a shame that there aren't more women out there then right now that have no problem being a little more agressive then other women.

For me it's not so hard raising my son. It's his mother that doesn't know how to be there for him at this point. I believe both parents should be in their childs life inspite how the parents feel about each other. By both parents being in a childs life it's helps with a childs develament, as long as both the parents are heathy to say too.

How about stop trying to figure out what he wants and actually do what you want. It's understandable that you want him back. But there is no sense driving yourself nuts trying to figure him out when you have yourself to take care of. And that alone goes for anyone.

Thank you,

I try to do whats best for my life as i do for our son. See, knowing me and the mother had our problems. it doesn't mean things can't work out as far as us communicating for the best interest for our son. By all means, I have my part in this relationship as she does. So in all, i'm still learning things from this and always will. The good thing at this point is. were learning how to be friends and will see where things will go from there.


Just one more thing. Even though I might be heading the right way and have somewhat of head on my shoulder. I still need to be reminded of thing from time to time.

I think taking care of yourself is better then letting somone else do it. You never know what might happen

I'm here because i helped build this site JK although I did get the new members forum up


Actually though, I have to say the same thing as Txsgal said. I was tired of the bs paying sites when I first started signing up on dating sites. Lesson learned, and now i'm here because I can be

I agree, and know a lot of what you all are saying. I been around AA for 30 years of my life. It has open my eyes up to a lot of things in life.

At this point knowing we have been talking about this for this last month and a half, and made the document together. Monday we will go to the court and sign this in front of the clerks at the Courts office. So at this point I think she is at least being honest about that. If not, it would be a big mistake knowing the court is taking her rights away from her for the other two little girls. Her sister that has them and her side of the family that don't want to have anything to deal with her right now. Said, they will go to court with me and will bring up the DCF case and all the other arrested between her and her bf in court. I wouldn't have any problem getting my son that way knowing it's the same judge that is taking her rights away from her right now and is ready to condemn her as an unfit mother.

I'm just trying to keep the peace at this point and not wanting to do this the ugly way. I want her to be in our sons life, but she needs help and knows it. Time will tell...

Thanks Romeo.

That is what this is about. Our son

No, I agree with everything you said. I think this is more of keeping the peace between us at this point. My main interest is our son and that is what I have been talking to her about. Keeping her on the same page is what has been working. She told me she knows he needs to be with me and he needs to be out of her life at this point. She said and knows he is unsafe being around her bf knowing how their life is. I'm on edge right now like most would be and keeping my eyes open to what ever might happen. YES! any sign of any trouble, and I told her this. She is out and i'm done with her. She might be using me for a place to live at this point, but I gave her a time limit to stay. She wants to work with me so we don't do a ugly custody battle.

I don't want her back. Not to be rude here, but she makes my feel sick at times and no women has ever done that to me. this is about being a friend. We have had our hard times and that is because of her relationship with her bf. She knows our problems have never been just about her. if all this works out as far as custody goes. ill be moving back to cali in a couple months. This has been a long hall for me. But our son is and will always be worth fighting for to have a chance to live a healthy life.

Sorry, hope you can read this. I was putting it in the wrong forum.

I normally wouldn't post anything like this and I really don't like people knowing my life, but at the same time. I don't have anything to hide either if someone asks me questions. For me, this will explain why I chose to be single right now and have no interest in dating at this point. Also, I take responsibility for my own actions in this relationship.

Some of you kind of know me for what it may be being on the net. For those that don't. I know there is three sides to a story, i'm just telling my side. I will try to keep this short. right!


Almost four years ago I met someone on this site. As we all hope for when beginning a relationship, that the communication grows and the relationship grows. Well, a lot of the time it does't work out. Longer story short. We end up having a beautiful boy. I end up moving from cali to Ut to raise our son only to find out that my ex was getting back with her ex. My worst nightmare became true. Almost three years now I have been fighting for custody for my son because the unsafe, unhealthy violent environmental my ex has been raising our son up in with the man no matter what happens she wont let go.

My ex has been going in and out of jail like her so call bf this last three months. She lost her other two children too, through the court. She doesn't know this at this point. But the judge is going to make them make a choice. One of her sisters is getting full custody of the two children with full rights, and my ex is going to lose her rights weather she gives them up willing or not. If she doesn't give them up wiling, the court is going to find them both as unfit parents. To make matters worst. She is not taking her medication and has talked to me about it, plus her father past away 4 months ago. So now both parent have past and she is still dealing with that emotionally. She is homeless and thats because her uncle kicked her out of her fathers house and has no income what so ever. Have any of you seen that TV show hoarders? enough said on that.

As of yesterday, we sate down and made a document to ask the court to modify the joint custody. My son has been in my care full time since this last August. She is willing to sign the document and give me custody.


I'm not heartless, but I do have a wall up right now. She is the mother of our son and always will be. She has never heart our son and does love him, just she knows our son needs to be out of her situation because she knows it's not over with her bf. At this point She can't take care of our son. A couple days ago she asked to stay with me since she has no place to live. I agreed for a little while. She just got out of jail last week and has another court hearing and might get six months. Her so call bf will be getting out in a couple days. I told her as long as your drama doesn't come back to my house. I have no problem helping her for a bit. No drugs, drinking, and none of her so call friend will be allowed near my house or our son. And our son is not to leave the house what so ever with her. She agreed and I have my roommate and my nephew to help with that.

So, knowing all this. Would you help your ex knowing that they do know they need help, and is willing to give up their rights for the best interest of your child?

Like some, I don't see getting marred ever again. If you think about it, being married is no different then being in that relationship not married.


My advice to people that have plains to get married. try to make sure you know the person your going to be getting married to. Because if the relationship is not going well before you do it. it will never work either way.

Nothing personal to the elderly ok but I think after a certain age there should be driving test once a year. I have seen to many people that should not be driving. Like this lady that couldn't see over her steering, that decided out of the blue to slam on her breaks and stop in the middle of the freeway in the fast lane. If the truck that squeeze in between me and that driver didn't know how to drive. He would of slammed into her and would of slammed me into the side of the mountain. I have seen to many elderly stop for no reason and nothing wrong with their cars. Like the ones that stop on a freeway on ramp waiting for cars to past by?